


Making Dough

by 8ethespider8itch



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-13
Updated: 2018-02-05
Packaged: 2018-03-07 09:40:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 41,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3170168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/8ethespider8itch/pseuds/8ethespider8itch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A young woman stands in her bedroom, unsure as to how things managed to get this out of hand.</p><p>After losing her job, college student Vriska Serket takes employment at a locally-owned pizza shop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Vriska Serket was in deep shit.

At 22 years old, Vriska was a dual major in chemistry and physics. Her penchant for disaster and destruction as well as her fascination with the end of the world made her a fabulous and innovative student, though at the cost of causing conflict and chaos wherever she went. One little extra credit project had destroyed Eridan Ampora’s apartment, and almost taken Equius Zahack’s with it. Disaster even followed her to Harley’s Diner, the infamous hangover-curing eatery just off campus where Vriska waited tables. Coffee pots were shattered, meals were spit in, and screaming matches were had. Until now, that hadn’t mattered. The tiny family-owned  diner, where everyone ate at from 10 pm to morning, had kept her on to clean up after messy parties and kick out drunken minors before the cops showed up for breakfast. None of the other waitresses were willing to do the jobs Vriska did on the graveyard shift. Also, no one else would be caught dead applying for a job there, so it wasn’t as if anyone could replace her if she lost her head and threatened a customer or threw a coffee mug against the wall.  That had all changed two weeks ago. Old Mr. Harley, a firecracker if there ever was one, had been accidentally shot and would be spending the rest of his days in a nursing home, bemoaning his aching hip. The diner was changing hands, and the new management wasn’t a fan of Vriska’s “go fuck yourself” attitude or her methods for drunk removal. They fired her before they even saw her in action, having heard the stories of her impressive endeavors.

All of this lead up to one Miss Serket losing of her only source of income. She lived in a tiny off-campus apartment with no roommate to split the bill. Technically, she could call her mother. Incredibly wealthy and somewhat predatory in nature, Vriska’s mother could afford to pay her daughter’s bills just as easily as she paid tuition. However, asking Momma involved swallowing several gallons of pride, since Vriska had told her mother that she was “not some 8itch 8a8y” and she could “totaaaaaaaally 8e a grownup and pay her own 8ills or wh8tever.” Being a grownup did not involve calling your momma every time there’s a small hangup.  Besides that, it felt safer to avoid being linked with her mother’s dubious income. So Vriska sold her TV for a month’s rent money and had been on the job hunt since. So far, she had heard back from none of her would-be employers.

This was about to change.

A generic ringtone sang muffled notes out of Vriska’s pocket, signifying an unknown caller. She tapped the call button and put the phone to her ear. “Hello?” she asked brusquely.

“Hi, is this Vriska Secret?” an irritable voice crackled through the speakers, a bit too loud for polite phone conversation. Vriska cringed, both from the butchery of her name and the loud voice destroying her eardrums.

“Serket,” she replied automatically, unable to keep herself from snapping. “May I ask who’s calling?”

“I’m calling from Suburban Grub Pizza and Eatery on South Main. I need you to come in for an interview. You /did/ apply for a job with us, didn’t you?” the cranky voice on the other end, still grating, seemed to be trying to suppress hostility. The speaker was failing. But this was it! The opportunity Vriska had been waiting for! Finally, a job. Sure, it was just a greasy family-owned pizza joint just off campus, but money was money.

Vriska’s tone became suddenly polite and professional. “Yes, I did. When would be the most optimal time for me to come in and speak with you?”

Cranky Pizza Voice was silent for a moment, aside from the sound of papers being shuffled frantically. “I’ll see you at 2 pm tomorrow. That good enough?”

“Of course. It’s been a pleasure speaking with you,” Vriska answered, still in her best kiss-ass tone. Shouty Pizza Voice didn’t answer. There was a click, and soon all Vriska could hear was a dial tone ringing faintly in her ear.

Vriska wasn’t nervous. She was the best at everything. She was the best physicist, best chemist, and she’d been the best damn waitress Harley’s Diner had ever seen. What did she have to be nervous about? Shouty Pizza Voice was obvioooouuuusly going to love her and hire her on site. So why did her hands shake as she pushed open the door of the pizza shop the following afternoon?

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­The clearly harried manager, who she had immediately recognized as Shouty Pizza Voice from yesterday, met her at the counter with a sullen-sounding hello. He was a short, slouchy guy around Vriska’s age with heavy shadows under his eyes and very Italian features. Judging by his resemblance to the photos of the founder and his family that decorated the shop’s walls, Vriska thought it safe to assume that he was the owner’s son, or maybe his grandson. She was ushered into a small back room and the Shouty Pizza Manager offered her a folding chair before sitting behind a desk stacked high with paperwork and paper plates. He shuffled some files and pulled out Vriska’s application. “So,” he said irritably. “You worked at Harley’s for three years…did you do anything before that?”

Vriska fought back a sigh. Her lack of real, taxable job experience was what had kept her from having a job before she’d been mercifully hired at Harley’s.  “I worked at a gun club. Picked up unshattered clay pigeons and stacked them in boxes to be re-shot. A penny a disk. It was under the table, obviously, but if you call the club they’ll recognize my name.”

Shouty Pizza Manager, whose nameplate said “KARKAT” on it in scratched letters, sighed hard and loud. Vriska found herself wondering whether it was a surname or just unfortunate. Those capital letters paired with Shouty’s inability to speak at conversational levels made it impossible for her not to yell his name in her head. “And what about your disability? You have yourself listed here as ‘minorly physically handicapped.’ We don’t discriminate, but will you be able to do whatever your kitchen duties of the day are with your handicap?” KARKAT’s gaze searched her boldly, seeking some kind of obviously lacking limb.

“The majority of my left arm is ceramic and titanium, and I’m legally blind in my left eye. Nothing to hold me back from my ‘kitchen duties.’” Vriska was barely able to resist putting air-quotes around the phrase with her fingers. The manager glared at her, but that seemed to be his usual expression.

“Your availability still 5 evenings a week?” Vriska nodded at him silently, trying to avoid her inevitable sarcasm slipping out and ruining her chances. Apparently this effort paid off, because the next thing KARKAT said, after shuffling around some papers on his disastrous desk, was “You’re the only applicant who’s even remotely qualified for the job and has substantial availability. I don’t like hiring on the spot, but it looks like you’ve got yourself a job.”

Vriska grinned and fought the urge to punch the air. KARKAT, who looked no older than her aside from heavy shadows under his eyes, lobbed a balled up tee shirt at her. “Work uniform,” he told her gruffly. “Wear some kind of black pants with it. I don’t care what, this isn’t an office. You’ll be training under Terezi. Best pizza maker I’ve ever met.” Vriska swore she saw a blush below his sleepy shadows, if only momentarily. “Weird as all hell though. Your first shift is tomorrow at 6.”

“Yes sir, fearless leader!” Vriska said enthusiastically, with only a touch of sarcasm.

KARKAT stared at her for a second, then barked “Get out of my office!” Startled, Vriska barely kept from jumping, before turning and heading out the door. She heard him call after her “Make sure you have that hair pulled back when you come in!” as she hurried to her car.

Later that evening, when Vriska was home and had made a cursory attempt at straightening her room, she phoned Kanaya.  Both ex-girlfriend and current best friend, Kanaya was taking classes at a school in their hometown, roughly half an hour away. She and Vriska texted regularly, and evening phone calls were fairly regular. However, Vriska was generally too irresponsible to remember to call first, so it was with some surprise that Kanaya answered the call on the first ring.

“What Happened? Is Anyone Dead? Should I order takeout?” Kanaya asked, her tone calm and even but her pace a bit quicker than the norm.

“Wow fussypants, may8e I shouldn’t tell you the good news. You’re 8eing verrrrrrry 8itchy tonight,” Vriska snarked, holding the phone with her good shoulder while mixing her last packet of ramen into some boiling water and trying not to think about takeout.

“Good News?” Kanaya asked. Vriska could hear the indulgent smile in her friend’s voice from across the line. It was this tone that made Vriska feel as though she was being humored, treated like an adult to avoid meltdowns more than out of respect for her adulthood. She tried to ignore it.

“Yes!!!!!!!! I’ll 8e working at a pizza place off campus starting tomorrow. I’m gonna 8e the 8est pizza maker in the whole world. Look out world, Vriska Serket, pizza pir8 will 8e making her de8ut tomorrow at 6 pm!”

“Congratulations Vriska! I Am Very Proud Of You. Perhaps This Weekend When I Visit We Can Celebrate Your Newly Achieved Employment Status With Alcoholic Beverages And Celebratory Chinese Food?”

“Sounds 8adass to me. You gonna 8e here Friday night or are you coming Saturday?”

Kanaya hesitated. “That Depends On Your Feelings…Would It Be Improper For Me To Bring Along A Young Lady?”

Vriska gasped dramatically. “8ring a woman? Into my house? Oh the horror!” She laughed. “8ring your lovely lady along, fussy8itch, I don’t mind. Would this 8e the infamous Miss Lalonde, 8y any chance?”

“It…It Could Possibly Be Rose, Yes. If You Are Sure That Would Be Acceptable To You.”

“Of course you can 8ring her along! I’ve 8een asking to meet her for aaaaaaaages!”

“I Know You Have Vriska, But Until Recently We Were Not Officially Courting. And Aside From That, I Felt That A Meeting Between My Former Lover And My Future Lover Would Be Uncomfortable For All In Attendance, Myself In Particular. However, After Immense Pressure From Both You And Rose, I Have Decided It Is Time For The Two Of You To Become Acquainted.”

Vriska snorted ungracefully. “Well it’s a8out damn time. You’ve kept us 8oth in suspense for too long. Anyway, I’d 8etter go, I can’t safely eat these noodles while I’m on the phone with you. Text me.” She hung up before Kanaya could utter any more maternal musings, possibly on Vriska’s nutrition, table manners, or inability to multitask.


	2. Chapter 2

 

Staring in her wing mirror, Vriska fussed with her hair. She had 5 minutes until her first shift at Suburban Grub Pizza and eatery, unofficially known by students and locals as Sgrub, officially began, and she was not at all nervous. Not even a teeeeeeeensy bit. Not about the cranky manager or the other employees, especially not Terezi, who her manager had described as “weird as hell.” Not at all. A bead of sweat dripped down her temple. Just as her fussing was about to become fretting, her phone vibrated from her lap.

“Good Luck At Work Today. I Know You’ll Do Splendidly.”

“O8viously. I’m the 8est ::::)” Vriska hastily replied, before stuffing her phone in her bra and climbing out of her car toward her impending doom.

When she walked into the shop, a bell rang above her head, announcing her arrival. KARKAT (first or last name? Should she ask?) didn’t say anything to her, just jerked his thumb behind him then continued jotting down an order with one hand and twirling the phonecord with his other. Vriska directed her attention to the only other person in the shop, a tiny little thing with short dark-red hair tossing a pizza crust lightly on her tiny fingers. She must have heard Vriska enter the shop, because she shouted in a raspy, oddly high-pitched voice “Karkles! Is that the new meat you hired yesterday?” The girl turned to face them, and Vriska gulped back a gasp. She had a pretty, pale face with freckled cheeks, narrow, pointed features and delicate, translucent skin, but her wide eyes were by far her most prominent features. Mottled blue-white and thickly marbled with red scar tissue across her lids, they seemed to burn through Vriska, taking in nothing and everything at once. The strange effect of her clearly sightless eyes was only heightened by a pair of red-lensed cat eye glasses. “Don’t be shy, fresh meat! I don’t bite hard enough to do any lasting damage. Unless you ask for it real nicely!” The girl grinned at her, revealing teeth that were straight enough to avoid braces, but crooked enough to be noticeable. Crookedness aside, her grin seemed oddly predatory. Not only were her eye-teeth needle-sharp, the rest of her grin seemed threateningly pointier than most people's. But maybe that was the nerves that Vriska obviously was NOT feeling. She sauntered up to the girl, intent on exuding utter confidence.

“Hey, I’m Vriska.” She offered the girl a hand to shake, waiting a half a beat before realizing Terezi couldn’t see her hand to grasp it. Arm swinging awkwardly back to her side, she coughed. “I guess I’ll be working under you.”

Terezi winked at her. “I’m sure you’d like that an awful lot, fresh meat. But I’d prefer you just work next to me, thank you.”

Vriska’s jaw opened and closed a few seconds, chewing on some particularly bitchy retorts as well as some immensely suggestive ones.  Grateful that her suddenly rosy cheeks were invisible, she managed to tell Terezi that she was flexible so she guessed that would be fine. Terezi cackled, her wicked laugh shattering through the various machine noises in the kitchen, causing Karkat to shout at her to shut her godawful mouth already dammit.

Terezi showed her the ropes, so to speak. She started with a walking tour of the kitchen, pointing out the freezers, fryers, ovens, and other assorted appliances with uncanny precision considering her lacking eyesight. Vriska knew better than to voice her impression, but she still found herself wondering at how Terezi managed to keep the kitchen organized so that she could find anything and everything without hesitation. Vriska couldn't even do that in her apartment kitchen with one good eye. Over the next four hours, Vriska became privy to not only the location and storage procedures for toppings, sauces, and dough flats, but also how to sauce and top a pizza, bake it, and slice it up. Terezi was patient, teasing Vriska heavily when she made mistakes but in a way that made her laugh more than it made her feel stupid.

"No no no spidergirl, you put that much sauce on it and you'll drown it!" Terezi stole the ladle out of Vriska's hand and scraped some sauce from the surface of the dough. 

"8ro, how the hell do you even know how much sauce I put on it????????" Vriska asked her, exasperated. 

Terezi wrinkled her nose and swatted at Vriska with the spoon, splattering drops of sauce on both of them and part of the wall. "It smells too saucy. Now put some cheese on it and get it done."

Wiping sauce from her glasses, Vriska snorted and sprinkled a layer of cheese over the pie. "Suuuuuuuure it does."

Terezi just laughed maniacally, licking sauce from her fingers. "Shut up and go clock out, your shift is over. And there's sauce in your hair." 

Vriska rolled her eyes and blushed. Maybe she did still feel a little stupid. 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

As soon as the door to Sgrub slammed shut behind her, Vriska was punching Kanaya's number into her phone. As it rang, she yanked open her car door and climbed into the driver's seat.   
"Hello?" Kanaya answered on the second ring, sounding a bit crabby.   
"Hey, I'm off. You guys going to 8e around tonight?" Vriska asked, wedging the phone between her ceramic shoulder and her chin to fumble through her purse with both hands to find her keys.  
"Of Course We Will. Rose And I Will Be Leaving Presently." Kanaya sounded tense.  
“Some8ody’s moody. Whatsamatter Fussyface?”  
“Nothing Is Wrong, Vriska, I Simply Need To Prepare Adequately For A Signifigantly Longer Drive Than I Make Daily And-”  
A low female voice cut in cooly. “And she is quite anxious about us meeting one another because she’s an anxious and fussy, as you say. Hello, Vriska.”  
“Is that Miss Rose I hear? Helloooooooo! She really is a fussy fussing fusser, isn’t she? May8e she should look into therapy!”   
Rose laughed, a surprisingly gentle sound considering her chilly demeanor. “It’s no wonder she seems reluctant to introduce us. I certainly am not opposed to the therapy idea.”  
There was a shuffling on the other end and more laughter. Eventually Kanaya’s voice came through the phone again, in a tone that was positively mortified. “We Are Leaving Now, Vriska. Expect Us In Half An Hour. Goodbye!”  
Vriska cackled. "8y the way: 8ring Chinese. I'm staaaaaaaarved!" Kanaya groaned and hung up. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
45 minutes later the doorbell sounded. Vriska slapped the intercom button. "That had 8etter 8e two 8itches and some stir fry or I am going to literally die," she groaned into the receiver, buzzing her guests in before they could answer. She didn't have to wait long for her apartment door to swing open. The first figure to walk in was utterly unfamiliar. She had chin-length, white-blonde hair and fair, nearly translucent skin that contrasted strongly with her simple black clothing and lipstick. Behind her followed Kanaya: tall, bronze-skinned Kanaya, dressed to the nines, both arms full of waxy brownpaper bags on the verge of leaking grease on her strong, lean arms. The picture of perfection. Vriska inhaled deeply. "You're l8, 8ut it smells like you 8rought me something tasty, so I guess I'd 8etter 8e nice." She took a bag from Kanaya and set it on the coffee table.  
Kanaya sighed and set the other bag beside it, pulling out white paper boxes and packets of sauce. "Well, The Traffic Was An Absolute Nightmare. And You Had Most Certainly Better Be Nice, Vriska, Or I Shall Be Forced To Take Your Curry Beef And Leave."  
Vriska whined, elbowing Kanaya out of the way to grab a box and collapse onto the futon. "8ut you don't even eeeeeeeeeat meat." She unfolded the top of the box and dumped saucy meat into her rice, mixing it with a plastic fork. "You gonna introduce me to the lady, Fussyface?"  
Kanaya perched at the center of the futon, picking out veggies from her own container rather daintily with her chopsticks. "Vriska Serket, I Would Like You To Meet Miss Rose Lalonde." She patted the seat beside her and Rose sat close to her, comfortable in the strange environment. "Rose, This Is Vriska."  
With a grin, Vriska reached across Kanaya to offer Rose her hand. Rose shook it firmly, smile cool and hands cold.   
"It's lovely to meet you, Vriska," Rose said, withdrawing her hand.   
"The pleasure is aaaaaaaall mine, Rose," Vriska replied, settling back into her seat and filling her mouth with rice and meat. “Would you ladies care for a drink?”  
Rose smirked. “Yes please.” Kanaya didn’t answer, just nodded vehemently.   
Vriska reached under the couch and pulled out a bottle of rum, offering it to her guests. Both looked at her as if she had two heads. Vriska sighed and rolled her eyes. “There’s a bottle of pino in the vegetable crisper, Kanaya. You know where glasses are.” For herself, she took a heavy swig from the Kraken and thumped it on the coffee table, lid open.  
“Vriska, You Are An Atrocious Hostess, Did You Know That?” Kanaya shot Vriska a look as she climbed off the couch and headed for the kitchen. She came back with two full glasses, the bottle tucked under her arm. Settling in the center of the futon, she passed a glass to Rose and gulped from her own, abandoning her usual decorum entirely. The bottle clunked down next to Vriska’s. “So. How Was Your First Day Of Employment With The Pizza Parlor, Vriska?”  
“Well, it could have 8een worse, I think. It was fun to 8ake crazy pies for the campus stoners, honestly. 8ut my coworkers are a 8it weird.”  
Rose snorted, but was stifled by a glare from Kanaya. “How Are They Weird?” she asked, clearly trying to avoid conflict.   
“I already told you the manager was realllllllly shouty, right? Like, he’s so a8rupt and……..8itch, I guess. 8ut he’s not even the weird one. My trainer is this chatty chatty 8lind girl.”  
“How does a blind girl make pizzas?” Rose asked with a giggle, her empty wine glass askew between her slim fingers. Kanaya poured her another glass before topping off her own.   
“I thought the same thing!!!!!!!! 8ut she makes the 8est pizza I’ve ever had, actually. 8ut she’s noisy and nosey and she has these weird teeth-” Vriska made fang shapes with her fingers, causing Rose to laugh uproariously and nearly upend her drink. Kanaya laughed as well, but steadied Rose’s glass.   
“Sounds like you think she’s cute!!!” Rose said, smacking Vriska in the arm across Kanaya’s lap.   
“Rose, Sweetheart, Are You Intoxicated Already?” Kanaya asked, a smile playing on her lips.  
“Noooooooo, darling, I’m just tipsy!” Rose said, not at all reassuring. Kanaya grinned fondly at her and Vriska couldn’t suppress a noise of disgust.   
“You two are fucking disgusting.”  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
As the evening wore on, the three passed tipsy and grew sleepy. Vriska cranked back the futon so Kanaya and Rose could sleep. Then she stumbled back into her room to pass out in her own bed. Tangling herself in the covers, she thought about Kanaya. Beautiful, smart, and overwhelmingly attentive, she was the perfect girlfriend. But Vriska could not handle her particular brand of fussing in a relationship situation. Kanaya’s nurturing nature became stressful and overbearing when worrying about Vriska’s erratic behavior and mood swings. She used to wonder where things went wrong, and if Kanaya would ever take her back, but it just didn’t seem fair to try something that was likely to hurt both of them more than help. And Rose seemed a better fit. She was cranky and had a dark sense of humor, which Kanaya seemed to like in women, but was not apt to blowing up and storming off the way Vriska always had when Kanaya was too much for her. Which was often. She closed her eyes and the room began to spin around her. She heard quiet laughter and some creaking from the next room, and fought the urge to shout that good guests don’t fuck on the guestbed. Their laughter was troubling, it was warm and close in a way Vriska had never felt. But the sound was soothing, and as waterlogged as it made her chest feel, it lulled her into a drunken slumber.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Sorry I've been absent, this past semester has been really hard at school and I haven't been able to force myself to write. I'll try to be more regular from now on. Thanks for the comments, they really encouraged me <3

Morning came, and with it the throbbing pain of a well-earned hangover. Vriska woke to the murmur of affectionate voices from her living room. Quashing her primary reaction of mild disgust and irritation with no obvious cause, she groaned and climbed out of bed. Blinking, she realized the world was still bleary and unbalanced. What could be missing...oh! Glasses! It made her stomach toss to see the world so sharply through one eye, yet merely a smear through the other. Grumbling something about goddamn houseguests and their early hours, Vriska fumbled on the upturned crate next to her bed until her hand smacked down on a pair of worn-out frames with scratched lenses, which she unfolded and settled into place on her face. She blinked a few times, swallowing back the nausea, and checked the clock. One pm. Apparently her houseguests had let her sleep longer than she thought.

"Hope you 8roads are decent, or this will 8e an awkward 8reakfast," she said as she walked exited her bedroom, plopping down on the futon. Rose LaLonde was sitting curled up in fetal position at the foot of the makeshift bed, wrapped in a blanket. Her eyes were barely open but her face was oddly serene. "No hangover?" Vriska asked her, surprised. LaLonde had certainly been tipsy the night before, making her silly and giggly in a way that had seemed out of character even for a near stranger.

"No hangover," Rose agreed blearily, not looking at Vriska. "Didn't drink enough for a hangover. Just need a cup of coffee."

Vriska turned to Kanaya, surprised that she hadn't moved to make her lady friend a cup of coffee herself. Then she saw the deep purple shadows under Kanaya's eyes, and realized that she had not fared nearly as well as Rose in the hangover department. "I can make us a pot of coffee."

Kanaya groaned from her place half-reclining on the futon. "Oh Dear God, Please Do Not Try To Poison Us With Your Foul Motor-Oil Shit." Rose looked mildly surprised, but Vriska knew the dangers of a decaffeinated, unfed Kanaya at breakfast time.

"May8e I'll slip some whiskey in it," Vriska teased, though her own laughter made her head throb. "Would that make you feel better?"

Kanaya just made a noise that may have contained some swear words and half-heartedly threw a pillow at Vriska, who smacked it out of the way and got up to make coffee. She herself drank water, knowing that her coffee skills were subpar and that she would not at all enjoy what poured out of the coffee maker. Soon the strong smell of dark roast filled the room. Vriska wrinkled her nose. "I don't even like coffee........" she muttered, pouring two cups and grabbing a handful of creamer cups and sugar packets she'd stolen from Harley's when they fired her. She was stocked for years. The cups were set on the coffee table and the sugar and creamer were dropped on Kanaya's head, and Vriska knew to dodge away from the halfhearted swat that swung her way before Kanaya collected herself and started mixing her cream and sugar. Rose hadn’t bothered, chugging her cup black and making an awful face.

“Wow, Vriska, this is disgusting,” she said mildly, wiping her lips on the back of her hand.

“I can’t make coffee,” Vriska admitted grudgingly. “I don’t drink it, so I never bothered to fine-tune the technique. 8ut Kanaya knows that. And she still would rather drink this nasty, 8itter shit than have to make it herself when she wakes up.” Kanaya didn’t answer, she simply grunted and continued sipping her heavily sweetened beverage. Rose leaned her head on Kanaya’s shoulder and sighed contentedly. Vriska cringed and turned to clear up the empty glasses on the coffee table.

“Let me help,” Rose said, gathering the takeout boxes and splintery chopsticks that littered the table and floor. She followed Vriska into the kitchen, dumped the trash, and set to washing the dishes.

“You realllllllly don’t have to,” Vriska muttered.

“You dry,” Rose ordered, ignoring her. “Besides, I was hoping for a chance to talk to you alone.”

Vriska felt her heart beat accelerate. Nervous? Who’s nervous? Not Vriska Serket, best at everything! Her palms sweat slightly as she reached for the drying towel. “What’s up LaLonde? Need some advice on slaying 8a8es?” she asked with bravado.

“I wanted to be sure you were comfortable with all of this,” Rose said lightly, motioning to Kanaya’s semi-inert form on the futon.

“Of course I am!” Vriska blustered, “Why wouldn’t I 8e? You’re is the 8est thing that’s happened to her since...well, me!”

“I understand,” Rose said, still quiet. “But you just seem rather unhappy to see us together at times. If my relationship with Kanaya drives a wedge between the two of you, I am not comfortable with that.”

“Relaxxxxxxxx,” Vriska told her. “Sure I’m a 8it jealous, 8ut who wouldn’t 8e? You 8oth seem pretty damn happy. 8ut that’s what I want for her. She’s my 8est friend. I’m just 8eing a 8a8y. I haven’t 8een with anyone serious since Kanaya.” She continued wiping dishes in silence for a moment. “I don’t like talking a8out feelings, 8ut you need to know that my loneliness shouldn’t 8e holding you and Kanaya 8ack.”

“So you think it’s serious?” Rose asked, trying to and failing to keep delight from her face.

Vriska grinned. “Dead serious! If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have asked her to 8ring you. Got to approve and all that.”

“And do you approve?”

“I guess so. You don’t seem toooooooo 8ad,” Vriska teased, smacking Rose in the arm with her damp tea towel. Rose smiled at her and continued washing.


	5. Chapter 5

                Unfortunately for Vriska, Kanaya had a shift at the mall that evening closing for the retail store she worked in, and Rose was scheduled at Starbucks as well. Though Vriska was sick with the couple’s disgusting affection, she found herself surprisingly lonely as she dressed for her own shift at Sgrub that evening. She missed the barbed commentary exchanges with Rose, and the way Kanaya had fussed over her bedroom, her clothing, and the state of her hair, ratnest though it was.  Her hair was smooth and braided back now, thanks to Kanaya, for the first time in weeks. She had lovingly (and aggressively) detangled the snarls and mats post-shower, and plaited it into two French braids down her back. The apartment was oddly quiet, and Vriska found herself making excuses to do makeup in the car, to eat at work, to get out more quickly than usual. She threw on her uniform and sat down in the clunker at four, knowing that her shift didn’t start until six. Still, she drove the five minutes to work and sat in the car, contemplating whether to ask if she could clock in early. After about fifteen minutes of discomfort, there was a loud rapping on the car door. Leaning against the vehicle next to hers was Terezi, holding a red and white cane. Confused, Vriska opened the door.

                “Yes?” she asked, slightly annoyed.

                “Is there some reason you’re lurking outside the shop, scaring off customers?” Terezi asked in a singsong voice, tapping her cane.

                “I’m not scaring anyone!” Vriska argued. “I’m early, that’s all. I just thought mayyyyyyyy8e it wasn’t a good idea to come in super early, that’s all!”

                Terezi frowned, a look of mocking concern crossing her face. “Vriska!” she gasped. “Do you really have such a poor social life that you have nothing better to do on a Saturday evening than come to work almost two hours early?”

                Vriska rolled her eyes in the Patented Vriska Serket Ice-Cold Bitch-Glare, eyes leveling with Terezi’s for a moment before she realized that faces weren’t going to do a damn thing for Terezi. “Noooooooo, Terezi. 8ut may8e I just wanted to spend the evening enjoying your lovely, wonderful self,” she said, words just dripping with sarcasm. Terezi swung her cane, making contact with Vriska’s bad arm and making a ringing noise. Terezi’s eyebrows climbed right up her forehead. “8ionic arm, 8ro,” Vriska told her nonchalantly. She half expected Terezi to ask her about the accident, about what had happened, about ANYTHING to do with the arm, but she didn’t even blink.

                “Come inside, cripple,” she ordered, tapping with her cane to find her way away from the car. “Karkat said he’ll let you clock in early if you stop being so creepy.”

                Flustered, Vriska got out of the car and followed her. It was strange, not to be attacked with a barrage of questions as soon as someone saw her arm, or felt it, or noticed the odd shape of her destroyed pupil. Especially from Terezi, who was annoying and nosey about her personal life already, it was almost a letdown not to be grasped by the elbow and asked “How the hell does that work?” She felt compelled to explain, even without being asked.

                “You coming?” Terezi asked impatiently.

                “Right behind you!” she replied, standing entirely too close.

                Karkat did not seem pleased to see Vriska two hours before her shift started. However, between Terezi’s manic giggling and Vriska’s insistence that she needed a review before the dinner rush, he allowed her to begin working. Terezi dragged Vriska back to the make table, giggling like a hyena all the while, and told her to make her a pepperoni and banana pepper pizza with a stuffed crust.

                “Already?” Vriska asked. “I just got here! Can’t I have a review?”

                “No better way to learn than practice!” Terezi answered. “Now go!” She began humming the Jeopardy theme, rocking on the balls of her feet.

                Sighing, Vriska pulled a base out of the freezer and poured a ladle of sauce onto the center, circling it outward.

                “Leave room for the crust!” Terezi reminded her before resuming her humming.  Vriska didn’t answer, she simple measured out mozzarella. She counted out pepperonis and layered them neatly, then sprinkled a generous handful of pepperoccini across the top. She lifted the pie, settled it on a pizza stone, and was about to insert it in the oven opening, but Terezi stopped her, sniffing deeply. “Too much sauce, too little banana pepper, and it took you too long!” she said, pushing the stone through the oven nonetheless. “We can still have it for dinner, though!”

                “Rules, rules, rules,” Vriska muttered. “I’m sooooooo sure you can make aaaaaaaany pizza perfectly in seconds flat, of course.”

                “Try me,” Terezi challenged, teeth bared in a predatory smirk. “Anything you like, spidergirl.”

                Vriska was taken aback. “Spidergirl?” she asked.

                “Yeah!” Terezi said enthusiastically. “Because you’re all spindly and sneaky and skinny. And you like them, don’t you?”

                “I mean, yeah?” Vriska said, still unsure. “8ut how did you…whatever.” She cut herself off decisively. “Let’s stick with pizza for now. I want a white sauce pizza with anchovies and mushrooms and 8lack olives.”

                Terezi wrinkled her nose. “Anchovies? Really?” she asked, disgust all over her face. “And mushrooms? You want to eat that?”

                “And 8lack olives, yes,” Vriska answered archly. “Why? Too much for you?”

                Terezi cackled. “Oh yes, too much for me, your highness. I cannot fathom how to create the mythical treat of disgusting horror you desire so deeply. It’s so outside the law of the land, I don’t know how to go on-“

                “The law of the land?” Vriska asked, snorting. “What is it with you? Follow all the pizza rules, everything in its place, the law of the land- 8ut why? Why  are you so anal a8out the rules?”

                “Rules make life more fun!” Terezi said, scandalized.

                “Yeah if you’re 8reaking them, may8e!” Vriska giggled.

                “No!” Terezi answered, sounding almost hurt. “Guidelines make everything better! Without laws, society would collapse. Without rules, this pizza would taste all shitty and disgusting! Without putting things back where we found them, the blind girl would be lost!”

                “Ok, ok, ok,” Vriska answered, clearly humoring her. “You sound like a criminal justice major, that’s all.”

                “Political science,” Terezi said, pulling out her own dough flat, a personal sized one this time, and deftly spooning on white sauce, measuring and sprinkling cheese, all incredibly quickly and much more neatly than Vriska had done. “I want to be a lawyer. I’ll be the youngest district attorney of all time.” She opened the toppings fridge and grabbed a small white bucket, cringing as she opened the lid and scooped out five slippery little fish, which she arranged in a perfect star shape at the center of the pie.

                “So pizza isn’t your truest life passion?” Vriska mock-pouted. “I’m shocked!”

                “No, pizza just pays the bills,” Terezi sighed, theatrically. “Alas, I am not independently wealthy and am forced to work my way through college.” She added mushrooms and olives to the pizza. “Is this to your standards, madame?”

                Vriska couldn’t hide her shock. “It took me like ten minutes to build yours! That’s not even fair! You can’t even see the ingredients, how do you find them?”

                She sniffed loudly. “I can smell everything!” Terezi said, then frowned. “Well, usually. Right now it all just smells fishy.” She stuck the pizza in the oven. “So how about you, spidergirl?” she asked.

                “I know, I know, I need to practice. I’ll get it down, don’t 8e such a naggy nagging nag!” Vriska groaned, wiping down the table with bleachwater and a rag.

                “No no, silly! What are you going to school for?” Terezi asked, leaning against the freezer door. “I bet it’s something dangerous…are you criminal justice?”

                Vriska mock-gagged. “Hell no! I’m waaaaaaaaay 8etter than that, that’s soooooooo 8oring! I’m a dual major, in physics and chemistry.”

                “What are you going to do with an abstracty major like that?” Terezi pressed.

                “I’d like to work for the government or some kind of military contract. I like making things that explode, things that are maaaaaaaay8e a 8it too destructive to 8e safe for people to use. 8ut not to 8e used for evil! I’d rather invent methods of safely disposing of 8om8s and missiles to neutralize threats. 8ecause then I get to 8low things up, 8ut still 8e a hero.”

                “That’s the most I think I’ve ever heard you tall,” Terezi teased, grinning. “That’s very interesting, spidergirl. You’re a little deeper than I thought.”

                The rest of the shift was rocky, with calls coming in constantly and some serious angst from Karkat. Three people called and complained about their pizza. Each time, Terezi stood up for Vriska. “If I thought a pizza was good enough to go in the oven, it was good enough to go in the oven, Karkat,” she told him, hands on her hips. He didn’t argue, for once in his life probably. Terezi was damn good at her job.

                “I don’t know what to tell you, Terezi!” he said irritably. “These people have some kind of problem tonight!”

                “It’s good for you to see this,” Terezi told Vriska quietly as Karkat ranted to himself. “Some nights won’t run smoothly. This job isn’t always as fun as it seems.”

When they began to tear down after the orders and angry callers slowed, the delivery boy knocked down an entire container of cayenne powder to the floor between Terezi and Vriska, which made everyone’s eyes water and caused Vriska to sneeze violently. Terezi, usually so confident and snarky, felt around unsurely and pressed herself against the freezers, eyes tearing heavily. Vriska was quick to get a dustpan and broom, then a wet cloth, to clean up the spicy mess. It was strange to see Terezi outside her comfort zone, wiping her eyes and coughing quietly. She found herself relieved when Karkat told them all to just get the hell out at the end of the night before he really lost his temper.

                As Vriska unlocked her car, she saw Terezi walking alone to the corner of the parking lot. She sat down on the bench at the bus stop, cane leaning beside her and legs swinging, presumably waiting for her ride. On any other day, Vriska would have been likely to just leave, but having seen Terezi in a minor crisis, she sat behind the wheel and waited for the bus to show up before starting the engine and heading back to the apartment.

                When she got home, Vriska was inundated with the emptiness of her apartment yet again. She threw her uniform on the bathroom floor and threw herself on the bed, exhausted. Today was hard. She could still feel the echoes of her hangover banging behind her eyes. Before she could think about anything at all, she mercifully found herself unconscious.


	6. Chapter 6

Sunday came and went, much more smoothly than Saturday’s shift. Terezi taught Vriska how to use the fryers to make wings, french fries, and crab cakes. It was greasy and disgusting, but the assortment of sauces was impressive.Terezi kept “accidentally” squirting her fingers with sauce as an excuse to lick it off before washing her hands. The spicier sauces like Buffalo Death made her cheeks rosy and her lips red, and Vriska couldn’t help but notice how cute she was. That is, until she got vriska in the face with lemon pepper sauce and licked it off.   
“Ew, what the fuck Terezi?!” she squealed, wiping slobber off her cheek.   
“Well that was gross,” Terezi said, sounding disappointed. “You taste like blue raspberry. That doesn’t go well with lemon pepper at all…”  
“I’m sorry????????” Vriska asked, flabbergasted.   
“You should be!” Terezi admonished, shaking a finger at her before licking barbeque from her wrist.   
“Ugh, you’re so gross……..” Vriska sighed, cheeks red from the hot sauce or the hot kitchen or the hot girl or the hot sauce was probably it.   
_________________________________________________________________________  
Since this was Vriska’s first afternoon shift, it was also the first time she left work with the sun still shining. It was a sticky, shiny kind of day, and since the air conditioner didn’t work Vriska cranked down every window in the car before leaving the parking lot. Cranking the radio so it could be heard over the roar of her dying engine and the rushing wind, half-singing and half-shouting the Red Hot Chili Peppers song that crackled through blown speakers. As soon, of course, as she had arrived in her air conditioned apartment where the lights were off and the pavement didn’t sizzle, she realized there was nothing to eat. Groaning, she flopped down on the futon and opened her laptop, searching haphazardly for online coupons. Suddenly Terezi’s grating voice was blaring unpleasantly through her head.  
“You get a pretty good discount working here. 50% off takeout, 40% off delivery, and 60% off when you’re on shift. If I didn’t like pizza this job would suck.”  
Vriska grinned and pulled out her cell phone.Karkat answered the store phone. “Hello Suburban Grub, Karkat speaking,” he said, tone oddly authoritative and calm.  
“Hi, I’d like to place an order for delivery.” Vriska smirked.  
“Is this a fucking joke Vriska? You literally just left!”   
Vriska ignored him. “Yes, a medium pie with alfredo, anchovies, mushrooms, and black olives. Cheese crust, please.”  
Karkat mumbled something about pains in the ass and lazy employees. “What’s your employee number? I need it for the goddamn discount.” She recited her number, then her address. “It’ll be out in twenty minutes, you know the drill. Fucking ridiculous,” Karkat said before hanging up on her.   
Twenty minutes passed quickly, with Vriska playing Pirate Quest and drinking Kraken and Coke. When the buzzer went off, Vriska hurriedly let in the delivery boy, a kid named Sollux Captor that she had gone to high school with.   
“Oh hey Vri2ka,” he lisped, handing her the cardboard box.   
“Hey Sollux,” she said, handing him a twenty. He fished in his pockets for change and laughed as he handed back some ones and a five. “What’s so funny?” she asked, setting down the pizza and pocketing her change.  
“Oh, nothing,” Sollux chortled. “You have a good night, Vri2ka. Enjoy your dinner.” He shut the door behind him and Vriska could hear him laughing his way down the stairs. Frowning, she opened the box, and found herself laughing as well.   
The pizza was perfect. It was a medium pizza, with creamy alfredo sauce, a thick, gooey layer of cheese, and the perfect amount of mushrooms, anchovies, and black olives. But spelled across the pie in hot sauce were the words, “WH4T TH3 FUCK SP1D3RBITCH YOU JUST L3FT! >:]”


	7. Chapter 7

 

A week came and went. Vriska got better at making pizza, better at frying wings, and better at fitting in at work. She learned to deal with Terezi’s weird licking problem and jokes that weren’t funny. She figured out when to laugh at Karkat and when to keep her opinions to herself. The delivery drivers were funny and always willing to help out in the back, even though Vriska couldn’t remember most of their names. Friday came quickly, and Vriska felt as though she’d been working at Sgrub forever, not a whole week. It was a slow, rainy Friday night. Karkat had been expecting crowds, so Terezi and Vriska were both on pizza, Nepeta was working wings, and there were three delivery boys scheduled. He hadn't been accounting, of course, for a torrential downpour and a dirt-cheap special at the Chinese place up the street. The store was dead and the phones were silent. It was only nine pm and Karkat had already sent home two of the delivery boys, and was trying to convince one of the girls on pizza to go home.

"I can't fucking pay you guys for standing here eating pepperoni!"

"Send Nepeta," Vriska suggested through a mouthful of meat. "I'll run wings and Terezi can stay here and do pies."

Karkat glared at her. "Nep only works Friday's and Saturdays, I'm not cutting her hours when you both worked overtime this week. Seriously, you guys don't have anywhere better to be on a Friday night? That's pathetic!"

Rolling her eyes dramatically and peeling off her gloves, Terezi sighed. "I guess I'll go, Karkles. I'm getting bored anyway." She grabbed her jacket from the hook beside the fridge and headed to the front to clock out. "But next time Vriska goes! I'm not giving up all my hours to you, fresh meat!" She made an "I'm watching you" motion with her hands, then cackled and scampered out into the downpour.

Vriska chuckled to herself, stuffing a few more pepperonis in her mouth as she wiped down her counter. She chattered half-heartedly with Nepeta, who played a few of the same RPGs as her and was decent company. Karkat sighed loudly and slammed things around.

For another hour, the phones were silent. "Nepeta, you'd better clear your station and clock out. John, run the dishwasher and mop the back room. Vriska and I will clean up front and we'll shut down early tonight. This is the deadest shitfuck of a Friday I think I've ever worked." Nepeta was gone within ten minutes, followed quickly by John. It took Vriska and Karkat about an hour to mop, clear the tabletops, and wipe down the counters. The shop was disgusting and clearly whoever worked the previous evening had done a terrible job. Normally Karkat would have been furious, but today he was oddly quiet. As they were about to lock up, he asked in a determinedly neutral tone, "is there anything going on with you and Terezi?"

Vriska stared at him, jaw half open. "Really, 8ro? You honestly think that's any of your 8usiness?"

Karkat blushed, and tried unsuccessfully to cover it by getting blustery. "Of course it's my business, I'm your manager! I need to know if there's any conflict I should be concerned about."

Vriska frowned at him. "Suuuuuuuure, mister manager. 8ut honestly, Terezi and I are totally cool. Nothing for you to 8e 8othered a8out."

"Um. Good." Karkat cleared his throat. "Just making sure. I think I'm good here. You go ahead and clock out."

Vriska stared at him. "........are you suuuuuuure you want to 8e alone in here? I don't mind staying and helping you out."

"You just want to up your paycheck. Go on, get home!"

Vriska laughed and clicked in her code at the register. "I'll see you Sunday, Karkat. 8e good!"

He glared at her.  "Yeah whatever. GO, Vriska!" And with a giggle and a wave she was out the door.

 

The downpour outside hadn't slowed, and was paired with a surprisingly cold, brisk wind that just wouldn't quit. The storm drain by the curb was clogged thickly with orangey brown leaves and the ensuing flood washed right up to the top of the curb. Vriska tried to maneuver her red converse so that only the toes got wet, but ended up nearly submerged to the ankle. Swearing, she forced open her umbrella, only to have it turn inside out in the wind. There was no choice but to run to the car, splashing all the way. She threw herself into the front seat, chucked the broken umbrella in the back, and jammed the key in the ignition. After three turns and some wheedling, it roared to life. She maneuvered the car out from between the two poorly parked delivery vans on either side of her, and was about to head home when she noticed something not quite right. Through the smears from her shoddy wipers, Vriska could see a small, familiar figure huddled on the bench of the bus stop. She pulled over and cranked down the passenger window.

"Terezi!" she shouted, "what the hell are you doing out here? You were supposed to go home hours ago!"

Terezi frowned. "Vriska? Is that you? I missed the bus."

"Terezi, there won't 8e another 8us until midnight!"

"I know. I've waited longer."

Vriska rolled her eyes and leaned across the car to shove open the passenger door. "Oh shut up and get in the car," she snapped.

Terezi's eyes widened. "You really don't have to, honestly!"

"In the car Pyrope," Vriska repeated firmly. Terezi stood, using her cane to find the car and carefully settling herself in the car, pulling her seatbelt across herself. She giggled to herself. "Gonna kidnap me Vriska?"

Vriska snorted. "Sure let me just do that. 8ecause I definitely have room to hide you in my stupid little apartment."

Cackling, Terezi smacked her arm. She winced, fingers stinging where she'd struck titanium. “Was that a fat joke? That sounded like a fat joke.” Her stinging fingers found their way into her mouth, and she sucked on them through her dramatic pout.

“No it’s not a fucking fat joke, 8itch. Are you cold?” Vriska cranked up the heat as high as it would go without waiting for an answer.

"I'm not cold, Vriska. I'm fine." Terezi shivered just a little, and Vriska rolled her eyes. 

"Suuuuuuuure you're not. Where do you live?" she asked, turning up the wipers a notch to clear her vision. It didn't help much. 

"I'm back in The Grove," Terezi told her, leaning back against the car seat and closing her eyes. 

"You don't look too pleased a8out that," Vriska teased.

"Not really," Terezi said, uncharacteristically glum and quiet. 

"What's 8othering you, Terezi?" she asked, concerned.

"I'm just having some trouble with the apartment. Shitty roommates, dirty neighbors. My landlord has been on my case about money because one of the girls hasn't paid in months."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Vriska said, surprised. "If you need a place to crash or something, you can always text me 8ro."

"Oh?" Terezi asked, tone back to its usual mocking timbre. "The big bad Vriska Serket inviting me to stay? Aren't you afraid I'm a murderer, or a crazy lunatic who'll steal all your underwear and jump out the window?" 

Vriska laughed. "Oh, you're crazy alright. I like to keep crazy nearby so I know what it's up to, so may8e I don't get strangled in my sleep."

"I'm sure you wouldn't mind a little sleep-strangling, Serket," Terezi giggled hard into her hands. 

"8luh," Vriska stuck her tongue out. "May8e, may8e not. You'll never know. What's your house num8er, weirdo?"

"413," Terezi answered. Vriska pulled the car up outside the townhouse. "Thanks for the ride, Serket. It means a lot."

"No pro8lem," she said, throwing the car in reverse. She waited for Terezi to get inside her apartment before pulling away into the night.

 


	8. Chapter 8

Vriska was never good at waking up early, and after staying up late watching anime she found herself rolling out of bed on her day off in the wee hours of the afternoon to the sound of a wildly vibrating cell phone.

“‘Lo?” she answered gruffly.

“Vriska?” Kanaya said, voice disaproving. “Are You Only Just Now Waking Up? I Thought You Were Going To Visit Me At Work This Afternoon And Be Fitted For Denim.”

Vriska stifled a yawn. “Yeah, sure Kanaya. I’ll 8e on the road in a few minutes, I’m just having 8reak- lunch. Just having lunch.” She grabbed a piece of cold, slightly crunchy pizza from the day before- or so she hoped. Munching, she slid her sweatpants off and left them lay on the kitchen floor as she walked to her bathroom to get the jeans she left there the last time she showered, which was also probably yesterday. She sniffed her pits and then her jeans- serviceable. Gnawing on the hard, dry crust she shimmied into the questionable jeans and hosed herself down with men’s cologne. Leaning into the mirror, she picked at her face a moment. Making a few horrible faces, she decided she needed a little makeup to wake up her eyes. A stroke of eyeliner on each eye, a few pokes and some heated swearing, and a swish with mouthwash later and she was out the door.

It’s not always easy parking in a jam-packed Saturday mall lot, but Vriska managed. She trudged grumpily into the mall, bypassing the directory in the food court and heading straight for the small, brightly-lit store across the dias.

“Welcome! Is There Anything I Can Help You Fi- Oh, Hello Vriska.” Kanaya stood in the entry of the store, folding sweaters on a small cart.

“What a welcome, Kanaya,” Vriska deadpanned. “So how a8out some pants?” She walked toward the wall of denim and bumped a stack of sweaters with her hip, sending them cascading. Kanaya flinched and shook her head in defeat, following Vriska without even looking at the scattered sweaters. Vriska continued absentmindedly digging through the denim wall for several minutes before holding up a pair of holey black jeggings. “What a8out these, fussyface?”

“Those Would Flatter Your Thighs and Behind Quite Nicely Vriska.” Vriska just nodded and hung them over her shoulder, diving into another stack. “Is There Something On Your Mind? You Seem Rather Preoccupied This Afternoon.”

Vriska looked up from her denim destruction, surprised. “Like what 8ro? I’ve 8een soooooooo 8usy l8ly, I’m not sure what you’d 8e referring to.”

“I Do Not Know What Could Be On Your Mind. Did Anything Happen At Work, Perhaps?”

“Oh! You know what, I’ve 8een thinking a8out the craziest thing! Last night after work, when I was a8out to drive home in that crazy storm, I noticed Terezi lurking out in the 8us stop. Apparently she planned on waiting until morning after she missed the 8us!”

“Terezi Is Your Coworker Who Trained You In Your Duties At Work, Correct?”

“Yes!!!!!!!! So I 8rought her 8ack to her apartment and made sure she went to 8ed. Who waits overnight for a 8us? She’s crazy, right?”

Kanaya paused her damage control folding and looked at Vriska with a bit of pity and said gently, “She May Not Have Anyone In Her Life To Call And Ask For A Helping Hand.”

“Sure, may8e. 8ut Karkat and I were still in the store, she could have come 8ack inside. May8e closing wouldn’t have 8een so weirdy weird weird then.”

“Weird? What Made Your Closing Shift Weird?”

“Karkat!” Vriska fumed. “My 8oss. He seems to think there might 8e something going on 8etween Terezi and me. 8ecause we 8itch a8out each other or whatever.”

Kanaya suppressed a smirk. “That Does Sound Particularly Uncomfortable. Especially For Someone Who Cannot Handle Confrontation.”

“I do NOT have trou8le with confrontation,” Vriska pouted. “I just thought it was weird that he was making assumptions a8out me when I hadn’t done anything 8ut trained with the girl!”

Kanaya didn’t look convinced, but she dropped the subject and handed Vriska a pair of jeggings with cargo pockets at the knees. “These Seem Suitable For Your Sense Of Style Without Being Entirely Unbearable,” she told her, smiling in a way that was way too understanding and entirely infuriating. Vriska snatched them out of her hands. “Let Me Set You Up With A Dressing Room So You Can Try Those On. You Wear A Size 8, Correct?” She didn’t wait for an answer. “And What Else Do You Need?”

Vriska shuffled her feet the whole way to the dressing room. She hated trying on clothes, and only bothered when Kanaya threatened her and offered use of her employee discount. “I don’t need anything,” she said, a little sullen.

“A Jacket,” Kanaya said, ignoring her entirely as she unlocked the door to the stall. “You Try These On And Be Sure They Fit Well, And I Will Return With A Suitable Fall Jacket For You To Wear.” Before there was any time to protest the door clicked shut and Vriska was left alone to struggle her way into two pairs of brand-new jeggings. She wrestled and swore under her breath, but as much work as they were, both pairs fit well and were comfortable, though it pained her to look at the price tags. She was still wearing the second pair when Kanaya knocked.

“8ack to torture me so soon, Kanaya?” she asked, opening the door just a crack.

Kanaya thrust a bundle of leather into her arms. “Try This On As Well,” she said, putting her hands on her hips.

Vriska shook the fabric out to find that it was a jacket, with buckles and zippers and buttons sealing off a variety of pockets. She slid her arms into it and sighed contentedly. “This Is Perfect, Kanaya. Pro8a8ly the 8est thing you’ve made me try on in this stupid store.” She looked at the price dangling from the sleeve of the jacket and winced. “8ut everything is so expensive!”

“Vriska, You Are Not Leaving Without The Jacket. You Do Not Even Own One. And I Would Prefer That You Buy The Jeans Today As Well. Will You Just Look At The State Of Your Old Ones!”

Vriska looked down and shrugged. There was a rip from her inner thigh to her knee and a long dark stain on the opposite leg. “I guess you might 8e right. I’ll 8uy a few things today. 8ut only if I can use your discount!”

Kanaya sighed in apparent defeat. “You Know I Will Not Say No To Discounting Your Necessities. I Will Go Ring These Things Up While You Get Dressed. Give Me The Tag From Those Pants.”

By the time Vriska was properly situated in her tattered old jeans, Kanaya had rung and bagged the rest of her merchandise. She folded the last pair when Vriska left the dressing room and added it to the bag. Vriska hugged her awkwardly, jostling a mannequin as she did. Kanaya smiled kindly at her and thanked her for coming, but told her very firmly to get out of the store before she knocked anything else down.

On her way out of the mall, Vriska caught a whiff of coffee and burnt sugar and steered almost subconsciously to the Starbucks by the food court doors.

“I’ll have a caramel macchiato with coconut milk and extra drizzle please,” she told the barista without looking at her face.

“Well if it isn’t evil incarnate herself! Hello Vriska,” Rose said, punching in Vriska’s order and leaning across the counter.

“Lalonde! How are you, you creepy 8itch?” Vriska asked genially, slapping a five on the counter.

Rose rung her order out and took the five. “I’m well. What sort of trouble are you causing for poor Kanaya over at the teen fashion dumpster?”

“Just getting a few necessities while the sales are good.” Vriska dug all the silver coins from the Take-A-Penny, Leave-A-Penny dish. “How are things in the hipster coffee dumpster?”

“Tragic,” Rose answered as she began mixing Vriska’s drink. “Every sad sap with a beard and thick glasses thinks he loves me and is entitled to a phone number and a smile.”

“And you smile for no one, isn’t that right Lalonde?” Vriska teased, abandoning pretense and dumping the whole dish into her purse.

Rose laughed, but it was a cold sound. “Not for anyone who thinks their existence means they earned it, no. Here’s your drink.”

“Thanks. You two should come see me the next time you’re both free. I’ll take you out for pizza or something.”

“That sounds delightful,” Rose deadpanned, but she cracked a small smile. “I’ll be sure to mention it to Kanaya when her shift ends.”

 

As Vriska walked away from the counter, intending to go home and enjoy some well-earned solitude, she spotted a familiar crop of ginger hair. Sitting alone at a small table in the food court seating was Terezi, cane leaned against the table as she picked through a Saladworks bowl. Without any warning, Vriska plopped down in the seat opposite her.

“8een doing some shopping, Pyrope?” she asked

Terezi cocked her head in confusion, then smiled widely to reveal her slightly creepy teeth. “Vriska! What are you doing here?” she asked?

“Shopping,” Vriska answered, “as most people do in malls.”

“No silly!” Terezi replied. “What are you doing in the suburbs?”

“Oh that,” Vriska replied. “I grew up here. 8een 8uying my clothes in this mall since 8efore I could talk. And my 8est friend works across the way, so I 8ought some junk from her this afternoon. What are you doing here, anyway?”

“The university offers a free bus out this way on weekends. Sometimes when I need to get away I’ll catch one out in the morning and spend the day wandering. I was just about to head back to the stop and go home.”

“Riiiiiiiight, because you’ve had the 8est luck with 8uses so far this weekend,” Vriska said sarcastically. “May8e I should take you home instead.”

Terezi looked surprised by the offer. “If it isn’t too much trouble, that would be great,” she said uncertainly. “But you don’t have to go out of your way for me.”

“It’s not out of my way!” Vriska told her. “8esides, what are friends for?”

Terezi’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “We’re friends, Vriska?”

Vriska did her best to appear confident. “Well, I know where you live. Wouldn’t you rather we 8e friends than something less friendly?”

 

The ride home was surprisingly pleasant. Vriska and Terezi found that they had much more in common than their jobs and school. They talked about awful animes they loved and garbage video games they hated and concerts they’d been to. Vriska found herself disappointed to be dropping Terezi off when she arrived at her house.

“Thanks for the ride!” Terezi said enthusiastically as she struggled to get her cane out of the back of Vriska’s car.

“Any time,” Vriska replied sincerely. “Especially if you get yourself stuck somewhere stupid again!!!!!!!!”

“How can I ask you to pick me up if I get stuck when I don’t even have your phone number?” Terezi asked her, exasperated. Vriska had teased her to no end about her poor bus luck on the way home after she shared how her seat partner on the way to the mall was a freshman boy who had clearly had one too many the night before and spent the whole drive vomiting into what sounded like a paper lunch bag. “Give me your phone, I’ll save my number and you can text me.”

Dubiously, Vriska opened the New Contact page and was surprised at how easily her sightless friend managed to program in her name and number using the arrow keys to navigate instead of the touchscreen. “You text?” she asked, feeling rather dense.

Terezi made a pitying face. “Vriska, voice command works just as well on a blind girl’s phone as it does on yours. Probably better.” She climbed out of the car and walked away. “Don’t forget to text me!” she called over her shoulder.

 

When Vriska arrived home, she opened her phone to text Terezi and found that she had a new message from Kanaya.

“Rose Informed Me That You Wish To Have Us Visit For Dinner. She Also Said She Saw You Leave With A Lovely Ginger-Haired Companion. Are You Sure There Is Nothing Going On Between You And This Terezi Girl?”

Vriska laughed aloud as she answered. “Of course nothing’s 8etween us, fussyface!!!!!!!! Can’t w8t to see you for dinner.”


	9. Chapter 9

Monday was wings day, and Vriska had a sinking feeling about that. She’d spent Sunday a fternoon alternating between lazily texting Terezi and planning with Kanaya for dinner the next night. Terezi’s type came through funny, an all-caps leet-speak type thing that Vriska could barely discern.

“What’s with all the numbers?” she’d asked. “You text like a dork.” 

“1 DON’T S33 4NY NUMB3RS.” Terezi had replied. “4NYW4Y, HOW COM3 YOU R3PL4C3 4LL YOUR BS W1TH 8S?”

“8ecause 8s are cooooooool,” Vriska had responded, then quickly changed the subject. 

But going back to work had lurked anxiously in the back o f Vriska’s mind, and s ure enough, before she even walked in the door she could hear Karkat shouting. “Fucking ass-stick shit-fucker! You’re turned on, you’re plugged in, and you’re fucking cleaner than a hospital bed’s freshly laundered sheets. Why the everloving fuck are you not frying these fucking bird carcasses!?” 

“Get out o f the way, Karkles,” Vriska said sarcastically, hip checking him away from her station. “This is my domain.” She reached her hand around the back of the oil reservoir and jiggled a drain cover, gave the side a kick, then pulled her hand out and flipped the switch. Immediately the machine kicked on. Karkat’s jaw was on the floor.

“Y-you...you just started working here!” He said, stunned.

“Yeah, 8ut Terezi’s 8een here awhile,” she said offhandedly.

Karkat grumbled, and there may have been a thank you in there somewhere, but she couldn’t be sure. It was then that the phone rang and he had an excuse to walk away. The phone didn’t stop ringing from 11 am until 5:30 pm, when Nepeta came in on her off day to pick up fryers so Vriska could run backup with Terezi until the end of her shift and nurse the burns on her arms from frier splash-back. It was the first time that day she’d had a chance to say a word to Terezi, but there still was little time for small talk. Orders kept right on rolling in, and Vriska knew she’d regret making plans to eat at Sgrub with her best friend.

In typical Kanaya fashion Vriska was still on shift when she and Rose arrived, seating themselves in a waxy window booth that evening. 

"Shit........" Vriska muttered, hands shaking as they put in their order to Karkat, who was eyeing Rose suspiciously. 

"WHO'S TH4T?" Terezi asked as Vriska rolled out a fresh crust and started making the pizza before the order even came back. “4ND HOW TH3 H3LL DO YOU KNOW TH4T HOT G1RL’S ORD3R?”

“Hot girl?????????” Vriska asked, taken aback. “You like girls?” Terezi didn’t answer her, just tapped her fingers on the steel tabletop. Vriska sighed. “That’s my 8est friend and her not-girlfriend.

“1S TH3 HOT ON3 YOUR B3ST13?” Terezi asked innocently.

“Terezi, you can’t even SEE!” Vriska exclaimed.

“TH3 ON3 W1TH TH3 D33P R4SPY VO1C3, R34L SULTRY,” Terezi explained.

“Nah, that’s just Rose. She’s Kanaya’s 8oo or something. 8ut that doesn’t mean you can hit on her, she’s taken,”  Vriska said warningly. Terzi just nodded absentmindedly. Popping the pizza in the oven and dusting her hands on her apron, Vriska muttered to Terezi. “Think you can handle the rest? My shi ft’s supposed to be over and I appear to be late to dinner.”

Terezi grinned, sharp teeth glinting almost predatorily, and Vriska gulped. “SUR3 1 C4N,” she said, syrup-sweet and sticky. “4ND 1’LL B3 SUR3 TO COM3 4ND M33T YOUR  FR13NDS WH3N 1’M OFF 1N H4LF 4N HOUR.”

“May8e I should get this thing to go,” Vriska mumbled as she clocked out.

“H34RD TH4T!” Terezi shouted from behind the oven. “1’M BL1ND NOT D34F!”

Ignoring her, Vriska gave Karkat a nod and ducked around the counter, dropping in a heap next to Kanaya in the booth. “Sorry a8out the wait, guys, we’ve 8een slammed all day.”

“Not A Problem, Vriska. Did You, Perchance, Happen To Be The Chef Who Prepared Our Meal This Evening?” Kanaya was already on her second piece of pizza and seemed to be enjoying it immensely. Half anchovy, half veggie lovers, with cream sauce and mushrooms on both sides. Vriska helped herself to a slice of the anchovy side before answering, mouth full. 

“Yeah, I made the pizza,” she said, cheese dribbling down her chin. “8est you’ve ever had, right?”

Rose ate hers daintily with a knife and fork, a seemingly ironic gesture. “It’s quite good, Vriska. Tell me, is your friend from the other day here?”

Vriska’s eyes got shifty. “I have a toooooooon of friends, Lalonde. Which one are you referring to?”

Rose gave her a level glare. “The one you work with, Vriska. Kanaya has been telling me how nice it is to know you’re meeting new people.”

Kanaya had the good grace to blush at Vriska’s indignant gaze. “I Merely Stated That You Do Not Often Engage In Social Behaviors And That I Am Glad To Know You Have Made A New Acquaintance,” she huffed, chagrined. 

“She’s veeeeeeeery 8usy right now,” Vriska told them, ignoring Kanaya’s backstabbing. “We’ve 8een soooooooo slammed all day, I 8et she’s up to her el8ows in orders right now-”

It was at this moment that Terezi decided to plop her butt down next to Rose. Vriska’s jaw worked furiously for a moment before closing with a click. Kanaya smiled pleasantly at her, beaming. And Rose’s lips quirked upward a fraction of a centimeter in what could very well have been a smirk. But Terezi, of course, saw none of this. “H1!” she said brightly. “YOU MUST B3 VR1SK4’S FR13NDS.” She outstretched her hand across the table in Kanaya’s direction, who took it and shook. She then did the same to Rose, whose hand she held a fraction of a second too long. This of course, was probably just Vriska’s imagination. “1’M T3R3Z1 PYROP3, 1 K33P VR1SK4 FROM BURN1NG TH3 PL4C3 DOWN.”

“I Am Kanaya Maryam, A Long-Time Friend Of Vriska’s, And This Is Rose Lalonde, My Erm. Signifigant Other.” Kanaya seemed to glow with joy, for some reason.

“Shouldn’t you 8e working?” Vriska asked pointedly.

“TH3 PHON3S D13D DOWN 4ND 1 D1DN’T G3T TH3 CH4NC3 TO T4K3 MY M34L Y3T, SP1D3RG1RL.” Terezi almost seemed to be teasing her, enjoying how anxious Vriska obviously was, helping herself to a veggie slice of the pizza. 

Kanaya was clearly charmed by Terezi, asking her all about herself and her job while Terezi chattered on, taking every opportunity to make fun of her coworkers, Vriska in particular. As she recounted Vriska’s first attempt at frying a crabcake, (“TH3Y C4M3 OUT H4RD 4S HOCK3Y PUCKS, 1T W4S D1SGUST1NG,”) Rose shot Vriska a wink. Vriska’s eyes widened and she frantically mouthed “It’s not like that at all, not even a little 8it!” while Rose just rolled her eyes. A painful half hour later, Terezi’s phone beeped loudly. “T1M3 TO C4TCH MY BUS!” she explained. “W1SH 1 COULD ST4Y BUT MY CH4R1OT 4W41TS.”

“We Can Certainly Give You A Ride Home,” Kanaya told her. “Simply Allow Me To Put The Leftover Pizza In This Takeout Box And We Will Be On Our Way.”

“1’D H4T3 TO 1MPOS3-” Terezi began. Vriska’s mind was racing. Terezi, alone in a car with these two ship-happy gossip hounds? It would be a disaster!

“I’ll take you!” Vriska blurted. Terezi blinked. 

“VR1SK4, 1T’S F1N3, 1 C4N JUST T4K3 TH3 BUS, R34LLY.”

“Nooooooooo way, not a chance. 8esides, you’re not even out of my way, really. Just a 8it off from my apartment. It’s fiiiiiiiine.” She took Terezi by the arm and nearly dragged her out of the shop. “I’ll just meet you guys 8ack at my place, ok? If you get there first, the door is open!” When they were safely in Vriska’s car, she sighed with relief. “You’re welcome,” she hissed. 

“TH4NKS. I RE4LLY COULD H4V3 T4K3N TH3 BUS THOUGH, 1T 1SN’T 4 B1G D34L.” Terezi’s warm smile showed real gratitude despite her protests, and Vriska almost forgot to be annoyed with her. 

“Not for that, dwee8. I rescued you from a painful game of twenty questions with my over-eager ex girlfriend.” Vriska’s driving was shoddy, but Terezi always pretended not to notice.

“3X GIRLFR13ND?” Terezi repeated. “TH4T’S NOT WH4T YOU S41D ROS3 W4S-”

“Not Rose, Kanaya,” Vriska explained impatiently. “She’s my 8est friend, 8ut we dated for like, 8 months. It’s not a 8ig deal, 8ut she’s very involved in my love life. And since I don’t have one, she’s willing to invent one for me.”

“OH,” Terezi said. “1 S33.”

“No you don’t,” Vriska laughed, poking her in the cheek. Terezi looked a little forlorn as they pulled up outside her apartment, and Vriska couldn’t help offering, “Want to come over for a bit? We’re just watching Jessica Jones on Netflix, Rose and Kanaya would love it if you joined.”

Opening the door, Terezi shook her head. “NO, 1 H4V3 4N 8 4M TOMORROW. R41NCH3CK?”

“You suuuuuuuure? I have 8lue8erry icecream in the freezer,” Vriska wheedled. 

The door closed. “1 GU3SS 1 C4N H4V3 4 C4PPUC1NO 1N TH3 MORN1NG,” Terezi mused, buckling her seatbelt. “BUT 1 SHOULD W4RN YOU: 1 ALR34DY F1N1SH3D J3SS1C4 JON3S.”

As Vriska pulled away, Terezi beside her rambling on about how much she loves superheroes, she almost missed the orange paper taped to Terezi's door that read:

FINAL NOTICE: RENT MUST BE PAYED IN FULLY BY FRIDAY OR ALL TENANTS WILL BE EVICTED. 


	10. Chapter 10

When Terezi and Vriska arrived back at the apartment, Rose and Kanaya were already curled up on the couch with popcorn and wine. "Make yourselves at home why don't you?" Vriska grumbled, plopping down next to them after helping Terezi find her bearings. It turned out that Terezi didn't need much help, which Vriska had assumed, but she continuously wrinkled her nose and said Vriska's apartment smelled like "RUM 4ND COMPL41N1NG." The four of them fit on the futon, just barely, and Vriska offered Terezi a glass of wine as Kanaya started the show. Terezi shook her head, but when Vriska opened her rum Terezi snatched the bottle from her hand and took a deep swig, wrinkling her face and laughing (relatively) quietly before passing it back. Vriska raised her eyebrows and sipped quietly. Terezi was quiet throughout the episode, occasionally tugging at Vriska's hair and whispering spoilers in her ear, to Rose's eternal amusement.   
"You are such a 8itch!" Vriska said, shoulder checking Terezi, who cackled. Kanaya, intensely focused on the show, shot Vriska a look. Vriska stuck her tongue out but settled back in her seat. Instead of retaliating, Terezi leaned on her shoulder and quietly pointed out subtle voice cues, psychological things that (she said) could tell the reader anything they wanted to know about the characters.   
When the whispering stopped for longer than ten minutes around midnight, Vriska tilted her head a bit to see what had finally shut motormouth up. Terezi’s mouth was half-open and her eyes were shut. She was out cold. Vriska fought back a laugh, and turned to Kanaya and Rose, who were cuddling rather disgustingly on the other end of the futon, ready to share an eyeroll with ever-sarcastic Rose. She was disappointed to see Rose give her a not-so-subtle eyebrow wiggle and wave now-empty wine bottle at her as Kanaya stared intently at the screen, ignoring all three of them. Terezi gave a light snore.  
It wasn’t long after that that Rose was asleep. She wasn’t quiet like Terezi, either. No, she snored loudly and slumped down on Kanaya’s lap awkwardly. Kanaya looked at Vriska sheepishly.  
“It Would Seem That The Time Has Come for Us To Bid You Goodnight. Will You Be Driving Terezi Home Tonight?”  
Vriska looked down at Terezi before answering. “Nah, I dou8t it.” She shook Terezi’s shoulder gently. “Hey! Weirdo! W8k up,” she hissed. Terezi stirred and mumbled something incoherent. “Wanna stay here tonight? I’ll make sure you get up 8efore your class. And you can take the 8ed too, if you want.”   
Terezi sat up slowly, stretching with her arms above her head and yawning widely like a cat. Vriska tried not to notice her stupid How I Trained Your Dragon tee shirt riding up to reveal a glint that may have been a belly button ring. That HAD to be from the little boy’s department of Walmart. “SUR3 VR1SK4. TH4NKS.” She stood up. “YOU DON’T N33D TO G1V3 UP YOUR B3D THOUGH. 1’V3 B33N TOLD 1’M NOT 4 B3D HOG.” Vriska’s cheeks colored and Rose somehow recovered enough to smirk at her. “JUST DO M3 4 SOL1D? G1V3 M3 YOUR 4RM 4ND GU1D3 M3? 1 DON’T 3X4CTLY KNOW TH3 L4YOUT OR WH4T3V3R.”  
Vriska was still distracted. “What? Oh. Yeah, c’mere.” She reached out a hand and pulled Terezi from the futon. “Seriously though, the 8ed’s all yours if you want.” Terezi took her arm like the were walking down the aisle at a wedding, confident in her steps beside Vriska.   
“W41T, YOU DON’T H4V3 4 TW1N B3D, DO YOU?” Terezi asked.   
Vriska snorted. “Dude, fuck no. Just figured you might not 8e the 8est at sharing. Also I maaaaaaaay 8e a 8lanket hog...” She reached into her dresser and found a pair of clean sweatpants, miraculously. No luck with a tee shirt, but the one Terezi was wearing would do. “Here,” she said, shoving them unceremoniously at Terezi, who grabbed them and looked confused. “Pants,” Vriska explained. “To sleep in,” she clarified when Terezi still looked lost.   
“OH Y34H P3OPL3 SL33P IN P4NTS SOM3T1M3S…” Terezi trailed off and shrugged, unbuttoning her jeans and sliding them down her hips. Vriska coughed and blushed, glad Terezi couldn’t see her blushing. “OH GROW UP, VR1SK4. P4NTS SUCK.” Terezi stepped into Vriska’s pajama pants and pulled them up over her underwear (seriously, what grown woman has How To Train Your Dragon underwear???) before flopping down on the bed. “DO TH3S3 P4NTS H4V3 POCK3TS???”   
Vriska quickly changed into an oversized shorts and boxers. “Yes, of course they have pockets. I refuse to 8uy anything without pockets. It’s 8ullshit.” She layed down on the the bed, back to her bedmate. “Goodnight Terezi.” She felt Terezi’s backbone press against her own.  
“GOODN1GHT, VR1SK4.” Terezi fell silent. Just for a moment. “DO YOU TH1NK P1G3ONS H4V3 F33LINGS?”  
When Terezi and Vriska arrived back at the apartment, Rose and Kanaya were already curled up on the couch with popcorn and wine. "Make yourselves at home why don't you?" Vriska grumbled, plopping down next to them after helping Terezi find her bearings. It turned out that Terezi didn't need much help, which Vriska had assumed, but she continuously wrinkled her nose and said Vriska's apartment smelled like "RUM 4ND COMPL41N1NG." The four of them fit on the futon, just barely, and Vriska offered Terezi a glass of wine as Kanaya started the show. Terezi shook her head, but when Vriska opened her rum Terezi snatched the bottle from her hand and took a deep swig, wrinkling her face and laughing (relatively) quietly before passing it back. Vriska raised her eyebrows and sipped quietly. Terezi was quiet throughout the episode, occasionally tugging at Vriska's hair and whispering spoilers in her ear, to Rose's eternal amusement.   
"You are such a 8itch!" Vriska said, shoulder checking Terezi, who cackled. Kanaya, intensely focused on the show, shot Vriska a look. Vriska stuck her tongue out but settled back in her seat. Instead of retaliating, Terezi leaned on her shoulder and quietly pointed out subtle voice cues, psychological things that (she said) could tell the reader anything they wanted to know about the characters.   
When the whispering stopped for longer than ten minutes around midnight, Vriska tilted her head a bit to see what had finally shut motormouth up. Terezi’s mouth was half-open and her eyes were shut. She was out cold. Vriska fought back a laugh, and turned to Kanaya and Rose, who were cuddling rather disgustingly on the other end of the futon, ready to share an eyeroll with ever-sarcastic Rose. She was disappointed to see Rose give her a not-so-subtle eyebrow wiggle and wave now-empty wine bottle at her as Kanaya stared intently at the screen, ignoring all three of them. Terezi gave a light snore.  
It wasn’t long after that that Rose was asleep. She wasn’t quiet like Terezi, either. No, she snored loudly and slumped down on Kanaya’s lap awkwardly. Kanaya looked at Vriska sheepishly.  
“It Would Seem That The Time Has Come for Us To Bid You Goodnight. Will You Be Driving Terezi Home Tonight?”  
Vriska looked down at Terezi before answering. “Nah, I dou8t it.” She shook Terezi’s shoulder gently. “Hey! Weirdo! W8k up,” she hissed. Terezi stirred and mumbled something incoherent. “Wanna stay here tonight? I’ll make sure you get up 8efore your class. And you can take the 8ed too, if you want.”   
Terezi sat up slowly, stretching with her arms above her head and yawning widely like a cat. Vriska tried not to notice her stupid How I Trained Your Dragon tee shirt riding up to reveal a glint that may have been a belly button ring. That HAD to be from the little boy’s department of Walmart. “SUR3 VR1SK4. TH4NKS.” She stood up. “YOU DON’T N33D TO G1V3 UP YOUR B3D THOUGH. 1’V3 B33N TOLD 1’M NOT 4 B3D HOG.” Vriska’s cheeks colored and Rose somehow recovered enough to smirk at her. “JUST DO M3 4 SOL1D? G1V3 M3 YOUR 4RM 4ND GU1D3 M3? 1 DON’T 3X4CTLY KNOW TH3 L4YOUT OR WH4T3V3R.”  
Vriska was still distracted. “What? Oh. Yeah, c’mere.” She reached out a hand and pulled Terezi from the futon. “Seriously though, the 8ed’s all yours if you want.” Terezi took her arm like the were walking down the aisle at a wedding, confident in her steps beside Vriska.   
“W41T, YOU DON’T H4V3 4 TW1N B3D, DO YOU?” Terezi asked.   
Vriska snorted. “Dude, fuck no. Just figured you might not 8e the 8est at sharing. Also I maaaaaaaay 8e a 8lanket hog...” She reached into her dresser and found a pair of clean sweatpants, miraculously. No luck with a tee shirt, but the one Terezi was wearing would do. “Here,” she said, shoving them unceremoniously at Terezi, who grabbed them and looked confused. “Pants,” Vriska explained. “To sleep in,” she clarified when Terezi still looked lost.   
“OH Y34H P3OPL3 SL33P IN P4NTS SOM3T1M3S…” Terezi trailed off and shrugged, unbuttoning her jeans and sliding them down her hips. Vriska coughed and blushed, glad Terezi couldn’t see her blushing. “OH GROW UP, VR1SK4. P4NTS SUCK.” Terezi stepped into Vriska’s pajama pants and pulled them up over her underwear (seriously, what grown woman has How To Train Your Dragon underwear???) before flopping down on the bed. “DO TH3S3 P4NTS H4V3 POCK3TS???”   
Vriska quickly changed into an oversized shorts and boxers. “Yes, of course they have pockets. I refuse to 8uy anything without pockets. It’s 8ullshit.” She layed down on the the bed, back to her bedmate. “Goodnight Terezi.” She felt Terezi’s backbone press against her own.  
“GOODN1GHT, VR1SK4.” Terezi fell silent. Just for a moment. “DO YOU TH1NK P1G3ONS H4V3 F33LINGS?”  
Vriska pulled a pillow over her head. It was going to be a long night.  
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
Vriska Serket was, is, and shall never be a morning person. Particularly not when she went to sleep at three o'clock in the morning, after justifying why she didn't like pigeons, why she didn't like birds in general, and why she was "SO GODD4MN GRUMPY 4LL TH3 T1M3, J3GUS S3RK3T."  
Her favorite part of the awkward part of the awkward conversation was when Terezi asked, "YO, HOW COM3 YOU N3V3R TOLD M3 YOU W3R3 4 L3SB14N?"  
Vriska sighed. This conversation was always uncomfortable. "I'm not a les8ian, Terezi."  
"OH, YOU DON'T H4V3 TO B3 3MB4R4SS3D W1TH M3, VR1SK4. 1'M NOT JUDG1ING. 1T WOULD B3 HYPOCR1T1C4L." Terezi cackled and rolled over.   
"No, seriously, Terezi. I'm not a les8ian. I'm 8isexual. I've dated 8oys, I've dated girls."  
"OOOH, TH4T'S 1T. 1 JUST THOUGHT YOU M1GHT B3 ON3 OF THOS3 W31RD CLOS3T G1RLS WHO D4T3 G1RLS BUT T3LL P3OPL3 TH3Y'R3 STR41GHT." She elbowed Vriska in the ribs, taking up way too much space on the bed. "1'M P4NS3XU4L, P3RSON4LLY. DON'T C4R3 MUCH 4BOUT G3N1T4LS. LOV3 P4NS, THOUGH."  
Vriska tried not to laugh. She failed. "That's nice. 8est to 8e straightforward a8out these things. Good-NIGHT, Terezi!"  
But in any case, they didn't go to sleep until late. Much too late, it happens, for Vriska to wake up peppy and cheery at seven am when a strange, shrill noise cut through her brain. "What the hell is that?" she mumbled. Terezi shifted. She was entirely too close to Vriska, but at this point that wasn't the issue. Stumbling out of bed, Vriska fished Terezi's cell phone from her pants pocket and hit dismiss. She shook Terezi, much less gently than she had on the couch the previous night. "It's a 8eautiful morning to 8e out of 8ed and on the 8us to campus," she sang mockingly. Terezi sat up, rubbing her eyes. Wordlessly, she shuffled out of the room and stopped.   
"B4THROOM?" she croaked. Sighing, Vriska walked over and took her arm wordlessly, leading her to the bathroom and showing her where the soap and mouthwash and such. Remembering her other guests, she dragged herself into the kitchen to make a pot of coffee and scrounge some breakfast. Microwave bacon, blueberry toaster strudels...not a lot of food in the pantry. She threw the strudels in the toaster and began microwaving bacon. Terezi felt her way into the kitchen uncertainly. "BR34KF4ST, HUH? YOU MUST B3 ON3 GR34T ON3 N1GHT ST4ND."   
"Oh, can it, 8rat. Eat your 8acon." She wrapped a strudel and some bacon in a napkin. "I'll walk you to the 8us stop."  
"SUCH 4 G3NTL3MAN!" Terezi cackled, taking the bacon in one hand and Vriska's arm in the other. "ONW4RD, TO V1CTORY!"   
"When are you gonna 8e giving 8ack my pants, weirdo?" Vriska asked as she lead Terezi to the bus stop.  
"PROB4BLY N3V34, BUT M4YB3 1'LL BR1NG TH3M TO WORK FOR YOU."  
"You know what, may8e you should just keep them. Karkat asks enough weirdy weird weird questions without you 8ringing my pants into the shop."  
Terezi looked like she was going to question this, but thankfully the bus pulled up. "WH4T3VER. TH4NKS FOR BR34KF4ST," she said, waving goodbye and clamoring onto the bus.  
_______________________________________________________________________________  
When Vriska re-entered the apartment, Kanaya was awake and grumpily guzzling her incredibly gross coffee. "Vriska, I Would Like To Assume You Slept Pleasantly? Much More Pleasantly Than I Did?"  
Rose was less tactful. "Your girlfriend wouldn't shut up and your coffee is shit, Vriska."  
"She's not my girlfriend!!!!!!!!" Vriska exclaimed, more energetically than she thought she was capable of at eight o'clock in the morning.   
"Sure," Rose said darkly, "and I didn't have sex on your couch."   
Kanaya blushed beet red.


	11. Chapter 11

The week was normal, if any week at Sgrub was normal. Karkat threw the cordless phone across the shop Tuesday afternoon, so after that they had to take calls on the old one with the long, curly cord. Wednesday Vriska had the day off and spent it playing Until Dawn with the itcurtains closed and the lights off. Thursday Terezi taught her to make a calzone, which was a strange reminder to Vriska that she was still new to the shop, and didn’t actually know what she was doing. And Friday Terezi called her, crying and incoherent.  
Ok, so maybe it wasn’t quite a normal week.  
The day started out normal enough, with Vriska still awake as the sun cracked over the horizon, sending red-gold rays between the blinds of Vriska’s bedroom window. She was just settling down to sleep, around six am, when her phone rang buzzed rapidly. Bzzz, bzbz, bzzzzzzz. Bzzz, bzbz, bzzzzzzzzzzz. Bzzzz-   
Vriska answered, a growl in her voice. “Hello? This had 8etter 8e good.”  
Terezi answered, quiet and hollow. “1T 1SN’T GOOD. BUT 1T’S 1MPORT4NT.”  
She caught Terezi’s tone and sat up, throwing the covers off and putting on whatever pants she could find. “What happened? Where are you?”   
“1’M OK, DON’T P4N1C. 1T’S JUST-” Vriska thought she heard a sob, but she could have imagined it - “1 GOT 3V1CT3D. MY STUFF 1S 4LL OV3R TH3 L4WN 4ND 1 DON’T R34LLY KNOW WH3RE TO GO 4ND YOU S41D 1 COULD C4LL-”  
Vriska cut her off. “Yeah, no, I’m on my way. I’ll 8ring your stuff 8ack to my place for a 8it. I’m just putting on shoes.” In a rare moment of sympathy she asked, “Do you want me to stay on?”  
“NO,” Terezi answered, sounding calmer. “TH4NK YOU SO MUCH VR1SK4, S3R1OUSLY.”  
“It’s not a 8ig deal. I’ll 8e there in a minute.” Vriska hung up and grabbed her coat, deeply grateful that Kanaya had made her buy it as she entered the chilly autumn dawn. It wasn’t until she got in the car that she realized how strange the whole situation was. Barely more than strangers, she had just offered to let this girl keep all her junk in her apartment? She also realized she hadn’t had the opportunity to clean like she normally would before someone came over. Not that it mattered, she thought wryly. Terezi wouldn’t see the things laying around, would she?  
She pulled the car up outside Terezi’s apartment and was immediately horrified. The lawn was littered with clothes, shoes, and kitchen appliances. Terezi was sitting in a beanbag chair looking like a forlorn little doll in the sea of detritus, head in hands and eyes shut.  
“Terezi!” she called, opening her door and heading across the wet lawn, trying not to hurry and seem totally panicked. “What the hell is this?”  
“W3LL,” she said softly, her feet skimming the dew. Vriska saw that she was wearing sandals. “1 C4M3 HOM3 FROM TH3 L1BR4RY 4T ON3 4ND 4PP4R3NTLY TH3 L4NDLORD H4D B33N H3R3. J4CK PROM1S3D US TH3T H3’D P4Y, TH4T W3 D1DN’T N33D TO WORRY 4BOUT TH3 3V1CT1ON NOT1C3S. BUT 1 GU3SS H3 D1DN’T. H3’S SUCH 4 B4CKST4BB3R. TH3Y BOX3D UP MY STUFF, BUT TH3 FR4T DOWN TH3 W4Y 1S H4V1NG 4 P4RTY…”  
“So they dumped your shit on the lawn????????” Vriska was appalled.  
“MOST OF TH1S 1S J4CK’S 4CTU4LLY. BUT Y34H,” Terezi sniffed.  
“Come on, help me pack up what’s yours and put it in my car. You can crash at my place.”  
Terezi smiled a watery smile and stood up. “TH4NKS VR1SK4.”  
______________________________________________________________________________

It wasn’t as bad as Vriska expected. Most of Terezi’s stuff was still boxed, and what was strewn across the lawn was easily tracked down. Terezi was helpful in identifying her own junk, for the most part. There were boxes of dragon plushes and rolls of bright posters. A crate of law books had been tipped on its side and a few were wrinkling in the dewy grass. Her clothes were all in a small rolling dressing table. There wasn’t much else, really. Vriska made a point to snag the kitchen box that was full of alcohol and didn't seem to be Terezi’s, as well as the fancy throwing knives in their smooth leather case. This Jack guy had some debts to pay, and he could start by donating some stuff Terezi (and maybe Vriska.)

Terezi was quiet the rest of the way home. She may have sniffled quietly once or twice, but Vriska had an old We Are the Fury album playing just loudly enough to tactfully ignore her passenger, humming along and tapping the steering wheel. The sun was up in its entirety now, glistening dew dripping down Vriska’s windshield and a shine on Terezi’s cheek that Vriska could almost ignore. 

At about eight am they arrived at Vriska’s apartment. The building was not as fancy as the cute townhouses next door, or the complex Terezi had lived in, or even the university-provided accommodations on campus. She found herself a little embarrassed by the cigarette smell in the lobby and the chicken-soup smell in the hall, the things she knew Terezi would notice and hoped she wouldn’t judge. But Terezi didn’t say a word. She shook her head mutely when Vriska asked if she wanted to unload her things, and trudged up the stairs in a similar silence. After unlocking the apartment door and plopping down on the futon, Vriska had had enough.   
“Terezi?” she asked, tentatively. “I don’t mind you 8eing here, no matter how long you need to 8e, 8ut we’re going to have to communicate somehow. Hand motions may8e?”  
Terezi sat next to her gingerly, rubbing her temples. “VR1SK4, TH1S 1S GO1NG TO D3STROY MY CR3D1T SCOR3…” she said in a soft, dazed voice.   
Vriska swallowed a laugh. “Gimme your phone, will you?”   
“WH4T? WHY WOULD 1 G1V3 YOU MY PHON3?”  
“Would you please just do it?” Terezi pulled her phone from her pocket and Vriska snatched it from her hand before she could protest. She fumbled with the buttons, not sure how to use an entirely voice-activated phone. “Call landlord,” she finally snapped impatiently.  
“Calling: Grove, Landlord.” The phone rang loudly, and Vriska turned the volume down a few notches.   
“Hello, Summer Grove Apartments, Roxy speaking.”   
“Hello Roxy,” Vriska said, sickly sweet. “I’m calling on behalf of Miss Terezi Pyrope. Would you please pass me on to your immediate superior?”  
Roxy sounded suspicious. “May I ask what the reason for your call is?”   
“I”m calling in regards to a recent eviction which directly violates the Fair Housing Act. I would like to speak with someone with whom I can discuss our impending law suit.”   
“I’ll transfer you to Mr. Felt immediately,” Roxy said, a touch of panic in her voice. “Please hold.”  
Terezi was flailing her arms and whispering “OH MY GOD VR1SK4 NO DO NOT ST4RT-”  
“Hello?” A new voice had answered, brusque and masculine.  
Vriska shooshed Terezi with her hand covering the receiver, then answered in her certified kiss-ass voice. “Hello, is this Mr. Felt?”  
“It is. What’s this about a lawsuit, missy?”  
Vriska took a leaf from Rose’s book, pulling out her best cold, level demeanor. “Well sir, I am representing Miss Terezi Pyrope. Her eviction was in direct violation of her rights as a handicapped citizen, particularly found within the Fair Housing Act. We will, of course, 8e taking this issue to court.”  
Mr. Felt coughed. “Excuse me?”  
Vriska smirked. “Well sir, Miss Pyrope was not informed of her housemate’s unpaid rent in a timely manner, nor was she informed of the eviction until her belongings were forcibly removed.”  
“There have been signs on the door for weeks!” the man blustered. “Letters were sent!”  
“Sir, Miss Pyrope is 8lind. Any signage you may have posted is entirely ar8itrary. She recieved no braile documentation, no phone calls, no offers of alternate housing. Miss Pyrope pays her 8ills in a timely manner, achieves high grades and is a model employee in her workplace, and is entitled to her security deposit, compensation for damage to personal property, and pain and suffering. Potentially lost wages as well, as she will miss work to find a new place to live.”  
“We can settle this outside of court, can’t we?” Felt asked, desperation in his tone. “Provide her with another apartment in the complex?”  
“Well, sir, if you are willing to return her security deposit and provide her the next six months’ rent, we may not have to take this issue to court. I doubt Miss Pyrope wants anything to do with your complex in the future, so there is no need to rehouse her, but it is imperative that no eviction appears on her credit score. I’ll need you to take care of that. Plus property damage...how does 6,000 dollars sound?” Vriska stifled a laugh as Terezi’s jaw dropped. It sounded as though Felt agreed with her assessment.  
“That is an obscene amount of money for an eviction, Miss…?”  
“My name only matters if you hear it in court, Mr. Felt. Imagine the legal fees, the inevitable payout, and the bad publicity for your establishment. I am in no way trying to blackmail you sir, I am simply offering you a deal. You’ll lose quadruple that as soon as we walk into the courtroom, easily.”  
Felt was silent, mulling over what Vriska had offered him. “Fine,” he replied gruffly. “Miss Pyrope may come to the office in a week to pick up her check.”  
Vriska wasn’t having that. “Miss Pyrope would prefer that you send the cash to her forwarding address. Do you have a pen?”  
The man shuffled on his desk and Vriska tried hard not to laugh aloud. “Yes ma’am.” Big change from missy to ma’am.   
“Miss Pyrope will be staying at Greater Willow Apartments, room 818. She or I will be in touch when her money has been received. Thank you so much for your cooperation, I will be sure to put in a good word for you with my associates.” Without waiting for a response, Vriska hung up the phone and handed it back to Terezi. “Your credit score will 8e just fiiiiiiiine.”  
Terezi took a moment to collect herself before saying quietly, “VR1SK4 1 DON’T KNOW WH4T TH3 H3LL TH4T W4S-”  
Vriska cut in quickly, “I’ve dealt with these issues before, I know my rights as a handicapped citizen-”  
“BUT TH4T W4S FUCK1NG F4NT4ST1C. 1 M34N, 1 QU3ST1ION TH3 L3G4L1TY, BUT NOTH1NG YOU S41D W4S T3CHN1C4LLY WRONG-”  
“So you aren’t mad at me?” Vriska asked.  
“OH, 1’M FUR1OUS. BUT 6,000 DOLL4S SHOULD 4LL3V14T3 TH4T R4TH3R QU1CKLY.”  
Vriska grinned. “I knew you’d 8e on 8oard. Now call Karkat. We’re not working tonight. We’re going to 8ed.”


	12. Chapter 12

Terezi emailed her professors while she was on the phone with Karkat. “NO K4RKL3S, 1’M OK. 1’M 4T VR1SK4’S. Y3S, SH3’S B3H4V1NG, SH3’S 4 COMPL3T3 G3NTL3M4N. OTH3RW1S3, 1NSP3CTOR B3RRYBR34TH WOULD B3 1NVOLV3D.”

At that particular moment of weirdness, Vriska tuned out. She didn’t have class today, she’d called off work, and her car was full to brimming with all of Terezi’s weird crap. Why did a blind girl need posters? Or a 46 inch flat screen? She needed a nap, badly.

“NO K4RK4T, 1T’S F1N3. 1’LL B3 1N 4S SOON 4S 1’V3 H4D SOM3 SL33P. 1’LL T4LK TO YOU L4T3R.” She hung up the phone and leaned against the back of the futon. “TH1S H4S B33N GR34T, SP1D3RB1TCH. BUT 1’M 3XH4UST3D. HOW 4BOUT THOS3 P4NTS YOU LO4N3D M3?”

Vriska grinned. “Sure dude wh8tever. I’ll 8e out here, you can have the 8ed. Let me just go change and I’ll leave them on the 8ed for you.”

Terezi rolled her eyes. “VR1SK4, 1’M NOT D4M4G3D, 1 C4N SL33P ON A  FUTON.”

“It’s not a 8ig deallllllll, weirdo. I’ll just 8e playing video games. 1 have some people coming over tonight.”

“OOOH, 4R3 ROS3 4ND K4N4Y4 COM1NG OV3R?”

“Yeah, 8ut so are some of my nerd friends. Rose wants to play Call of Cthulu. You should join if you think you’ll 8e awake.”

“Y34H, TH4T SOUNDS L1K3... SOM3TH1NG.” She smiled, and yawned hard. “1’M GONN4 G3T SOM3 SL33P. SW33T DR34MS, SP1D3RG1RL.”

Not a minute later, Vriska was asleep. She woke hours later when the sun was streaming through her window, right into her now-open eyes. She thought that was what woke her at first. Then she heard it.

Terezi had clearly found her way to the shower, and the water was running. Through the noisy flow, Vriska could barely make out a smooth, raspy singing voice. The words weren’t immediately discernable, just a velvety hum under the running water. Vriska smiled in spite of herself and got up to get changed into some real-people clothes. As she passed the bathroom door, she heard Terezi hit the chorus and get suddenly. Hilariously. Loud.

“OH! YOU! LOOK! SO! B34UUUUT1FUL! TON111111GHT! 1N TH3 C1TY OF BL1ND1NG L1GHTS…”

Vriska snickered. Fucking nerd. She closed the bedroom door behind her. Terezi’s clothes from last night were folded neatly on her desk chair, the only neat thing in the room. Vriska sighed, and began digging for something presentable to wear.

______________________________________________________________________________

Terezi had climbed out of the shower and wandered into Vriska’s room wearing just a towel, leaving a trail of drips behind her, asking if Vriska would mind loaning her some clothes, “B3C4US3 M4YB3 YOUR FRIENDS SHOULDN’T M33T M3 N4K3D. She ended up borrowing Vriska’s leggings, which she never wore anyway, and a baggy purple tee shirt that said “8low Me” and had four dice on the back. This lead to some snickering from Rose, who was the first person to walk through the door. Vriska had texted Kanaya after she got dressed, warning her of Terezi’s situation, and she had presumably told Rose, because no cracks were made. Eridan arrived next, in all his pompous glory. followed by Tavros and Equius, who had asked to bring a friend and had Nepeta sitting on his shoulders, giggling and kicking.

“Hi Vriska, hi Terezi! When Equius said he was going to a party, I nefur expected to know the purrson hosting!”

“Hey Nep. Ready to watch me have alllllll the luck? 8ecause I am the 8est at this shit, let me tell you. I have soooooooo many irons in the fire, you won’t know what happened.”

“To be honest, I don’t know what’s happening right now. I prefur to hang out online, mostly.”

Vriska made some halfhearted introductions, mostly letting her friends do the talking. Terezi seemed comfortable, chatting with Rose and Kanaya with hand motions. She thought she heard the words “S1X THOUS4ND DOLL4RS” so she steered clear of Kanaya’s disapproving gaze and started a conversation with Tavros, which was a mistake. Tavros was her first boyfriend. Vriska had been going through a hard time her freshman year, when they started dating, and she’d taken all her problems out on him. She tried to change him, bullying him into submission. One day, when they were bickering, he tried to hug her. She shoved him, and he fell down the stairs. He’d been in a wheelchair for months, and still needed physical therapy. He “ummed” and “uhhhed” his way through a brief explanation of his new Pokemon cards while she fought down the urge to fix his mohawk and tell him to stop stuttering. Logically, she knew he couldn’t help it, but he drove her absolutely crazy. Thankfully, nearly everyone was ready to get the game started at that point. Rose sat in the recliner, squeezed next to Kanaya. Eridan sat in Vriska’s wheely desk chair, Tavros on Terezi’s beanbag rescued from the car, and Nepeta, Equius, Vriska, and Terezi managed to squish onto the futon. Rose pulled a box of cards from her bag.

“uM, I THOUGHT THAT WE WERE PLAYING CALL Of CTHULU?” Tavros said, confused.

“We are indeed going to play Call of Cthulu, Tavros. That is what I have here, in my hands. Were you expecting something else?”

“i UM. i THOUGHT WE WERE PLAYING THE VIDEO GAME.” He sounded embarrassed, which was not at all shocking to anyone in the room.

“It’s okay, Tafuros. I thought we were going to playing the rpg. It isn’t a cat-astrophe, I purromise.”

“Well,” Rose chortled. “now that we know what we’re playing, let’s get started.”

__________________________________________________________________________

The evening went well, although Eridan was constantly shouting about science, which Rose consistently countered with wizards. Vriska found herself bumping elbows, wrists, and hips with Terezi every few minutes, not entirely uncomfortably. Rose kept giving Vriska intense looks, then jerking her head at Terezi. Vriska dealt with this by not looking at either of them, because oooooooobviously avoidance is the best way to deal with a problem.

More than once, Vriska wondered at the bizarre squad of friends who were camped around her coffee table. Equius, a neighbor who should probably hate her based on her estranged relationship with their mutual friend Aradia, was sweating and bickering with Nepeta, who he had apparently been friends with since childhood. Eridan, a friend from her major, was pretending not to enjoy casual arguments with Rose, who was playing with Kanaya's fingers. And Tavros...she couldn't help feel bad about Tavros, even as he chatted rather comfortably with Terezi about fiduspawn and Pokemon and a million other things Vriska could never force herself to care about. The game eventually devolved into casual conversation, and more than one heated argument about the merits of shipping fictional characters broke out across the table, sending Doritos flying at one point as Nepeta became suddenly enraged. Aside from that, Vriska couldn't complain. This was a decent group of nerds to pass the time with.

Equius was the first to leave, dragging Nepeta along with him. He was sweaty and anxious, and he muttered something about “visiting Aradia in the morning” and bid his awkward goodbyes. Vriska avoided eye contact, shaking his sweaty hand and wiping it on her pants, trying not to think about Aradia. Tavros offered to help clean up, but Vriska nearly chased him out the door, telling him that “of couuuuuuuuurse Eridan will give you a ride home 8ut you’d 8etter hurry up 8ecause he o8viously wants to leave.” That left only Rose, Kanaya, and of course Terezi.

“You staying the night?” she asked, exhaustion already setting in.

“Only If It Is Not A Problem, Vriska. It Is Only Ten O’Clock, I Could Easily Drive Rose And Myself Home This Evening If We Are A Bother.”

“Naaaaaaaah, fussypants.” She turned to Terezi. “Mind sharing a 8ed again?”

Terezi shook her head. “WH4T3V3R. B3GG4RS C4NT B3 CHOOS3RS.” Her eyebrows wiggled and Vriska ignored her.

“Then we must at least make ourselves useful,” Rose said, and began gathering trash from around the living room.

Vriska hummed absently to herself, leaning against the formica counter as she poured some coke into her rum, eager to blow off cleaning for as long as humanly possible. “Vriska, Why Are You Humming That Song? I Was Under The Impression That You Utterly Detested U2.” Kanaya looked concerned, and pushed Vriska’s bangs back to feel her forehead. “Are You Certain You Are Well?”

“Huh?” Vriska asked, distracted. “Yeah, U2 is actually the laaaaaaaamest.”

“WHO TH3 H3LL H4T3S U2?” Terezi asked, horrified. “TH3Y’R3 MUS1C4L INNOV4TORS. TH3Y R3BU1ILT 4 G3NR3!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, whaaaaaaaaatever, Pyrope. Aaaaaaaanyway, let’s move on to something more interesting already.”

Vriska’s cheeks were a bit flushed and she began aggressively washing dishes to avoid continuing this line of conversation, actively choosing not to hum this time round as Terezi and Rose playfully banter about something or other, she'd tuned out until she heard, "Cthulhu would absolutely beat any dragon, any time, in a rap battle. Terezi, don't be illogical. Think about the facts-" Rose would have undoubtedly listed and detailed these facts, had Kanaya not leaned against Rose's back, elbows resting on her shoulders.

"As Absolutely And Wholly Fascinating As This Debate Is, I Feel That It Could Be Better Put To Rest Were We To Simply Drop The Issue And Retire To Our Respective Sleeping Quarters For The Evening." She yawned widely, Vriska could see the gold-capped tooth in the back of her mouth. The water had gone cold, the bubbles were down to dregs, and Vriska's fingers were quite pruny. It'd been a while since she'd cleaned so many dishes, she was so prone to eating from her hands and lap that she often forgot about silverware and plates for days at a time, before trying to sip soup from a hot pot and burning her lips or eating green beans straight from the can with her fingers. She pulled the drain plug and sighed. 

"It's 8arely midnight, fussypants. Do we reeeeeeeeally need to go to 8ed this early?" She wiped her hands on her pants and leaned back against the counter. She'd never admit it, but bed sounded great right now. Today had been long. Too long, really. And napping in the middle of the day was great, sure, but some peace and quiet couldn't go amiss right now. She looked over at Terezi, slumped in her beanbag by the coffee table, sipping strawberry soda from a chipped coffee cup that said "Drop Dead" on it in gilded letters. She had bags under her eyes, deep and plummy like she'd packed some of her belongings there when they'd hastily moved her in and hadn't had the chance to take everything out just yet. Her eyes were half open and she was humming, something off key just slightly, but familiar. She realized she was staring, and blushed, turning toward Kanaya who seemed to have answered her, and was waiting expectantly for a response. "Ummmmmmmmm. Yeah! 8ed actually sounds like a good idea. 8esides, Terezi looks exhausted."

Kanaya looked amused. "That Is Almost Precisely What I Just Said, But Rose And I May Require Use Of Blankets And Pillows." She patted Vriska's arm, the good one, and smiled reassuringly. "You And Terezi Go To Bed, I Know Where To Get Everything We Need. Goodnight." She gave Vriska a gentle push toward her own room.

Terezi was standing now, unsteadily, looking like she might just fall back down into her seat. Vriska beckoned to her before realizing for maybe the millionth time that Terezi couldn't see her. "C'mon Pyrope, we should 8e getting some rest. 8ig day at work tomorrow or something." Terezi nodded mutely, and the two of them disappeared into the bedroom. Vriska could hear Rose and Kanaya murmuring to each other, tender voices that didn't quite make words, just sounds. Tonight it didn't sound like drowning though. Terezi was peeling off her leggings, and blatantly refused Vriska's offer of pants. She laid on the bed, wrapped in the first cover she could find. She couldn't possibly know it was a Gir snuggie from Vriska's 16th birthday, but a small pantsless woman wrapped in cover with Gir's head was the most absurd thing Vriska had ever encountered. She laid down, covering herself and the already snoring Terezi in proper blankets, and laughed quietly. As she was falling asleep, she almost remembered the name of the song Terezi had been humming, but the night had already claimed her.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a mini update, I'm working toward some things. Please feel free to comment, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Coffee with Kanaya, once a weekly ritual, had been severly neglected lately. Two weeks after the eviction incident, Vriska found herself at a table sipping Starbucks, making comfortable small talk over overpriced drinks for the first time in quite some time.

“Terezi Has Been Staying At Your Apartment Quite Often, Has She Not?” Kanaya asked in a cautious tone.

“I guess she might 8e there kind of often,” Vriska replied offhandedly,  twisting the straw of her frappuccino cup around and around. Five nights in a week was more than she cared to admit, but did it matter? They weren’t having sex. They were hardly cuddling. Sometimes Vriska woke up with an arm around Terezi’s waist, or with Terezi’s face burrowing into her throat. But that’s what happens when you share a small bed, right? Sure, Terezi could sleep on the futon, that was her choice. But after a weekend with Kanaya and Rose, they were comfortable in the bed. Some nights Terezi never came home. Vriska had anxiously texted, double-texted, triple-texted her the first few times this happened, but she'd learned to suffer in silence when Terezi laughed the absence off, citing study sessions and pre-law parties. Vriska stared down at her cup more intently now, cheeks suddenly warm, the idea of looking at Kanaya growing less appealing by the second.

Kanaya didn’t press the issue, she simply sipped her tea with a focused look, as though she was trying to see into Vriska’s brain. This was a look Vriska knew well, one she'd experienced endlessly during their relationship. “I See,” was the quiet response, though the tired look in her wise eyes told Vriska that no, she didn’t see, she couldn’t see past Vriska’s face and into her mind where she wasn’t interested in Terezi, nope, not at all, not even a bit.

Rose threw herself down in the seat beside Kanaya’s, clearly exhausted. “What, not bringing your girlfriend along on coffee dates anymore?” she asked, letting Kanaya wind their fingers together as she sipped from a cup of yerba mate that was steaming entirely too much to be safe for consumption. 

Vriska rolled her eyes. “Noooooooo idea who you’d 8e referring to, as I’m incredi8ly single and not a 8it interested in anyone at all.”

“Sure Serket, disinterested in that pretty girl you’ve been sleeping with. Seems legit.” Kanaya gave Rose a warning look, but Rose just laughed. “It’s entirely possible that you can’t see it, Vriska, but that girl cares an awful lot for you. Don’t fuck this up.” Before Vriska could protest, Rose was already on to the next topic. “You see that boy over there? Behind the counter at Taco Hell?” She nodded in the direction of a counter across the food court. A tall boy with a mess of wavy hair was leaning and baggy, spotted pants, expression vacant and swaying slightly. “He hasn’t moved in four hours. I’ve counted." She bit into a cake pop, face thoughtful. "He’s getting paid for this.”

Vriska laughed and stole a bite of Kanaya’s cheese danish. Chewing, she mumbled around her food. “Must be nice to work somewhere like that, huh?” As the conversation shifted, easily, chattering about Rose's job at Star-sucks, she she tried not to linger on Rose’s comment about Terezi caring for her. There was nothing safe in that statement, nothing Vriska could hide behind. It just allowed the millions of questions swimming at the bottom of her brain to well up in a wave, washing over her and pulling her down, down, as if she wasn't already drowning, being buried in the smell of raspberry lip gloss and argan oil, flooding over with the velvety humming of someone, SOMEONE singing in the shower. 

"What do you think, Vriska?" Vriska jolted, and looked up. Rose and Kanaya were both staring at her, expectantly.   
"What?" she asked.  
Rose rolled her eyes, but Kanaya was patient. "We Were Discussing Having A Small Get-Together At My Apartment. Rose Suggested That You Might Invite Terezi, We Both Enjoyed Her Company Previously." Rose snickered at this, but again this was quelled by a look from her girlfriend. 

Vriska stirred her now-melted coffee slush with the straw. "May8e. What sort of 'get-together' are we talking about, fussybutt?" 

"Cocktails, Some Snacks, Music. Vriska, You Have Attended My Soirees In The Past. We May Play A Game Of Murder Mystery Or Something Equally Inane." Before Vriska could reply, Kanaya checked her watch. "It Is Nearly Three Thirty, Vriska, Do You Need To Leave Now?"

"Oooooooooh, I really do, I'm going to 8e l8!" Vriska stood up hurriedly, slinging her bag over her shoulder. "Text me the d8 of your party thing and I'll mention it to Terezi. May8e I'll even think a8out tagging along." And with that she was on her way.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
The drive to work from the mall was tolerable, and at this weird time there were few cars on the road. She might not even be late after all. She flipped through the radio stations, humming along to grating pop tunes and crackly dad-rock absentmindedly. Switch. Switch. Switch. 

“And I miss you when you’re not around, I’m getting ready to leave the ground.” The music grated on her. U2. Ugh. Garbage. She started to change the station, but hesitated. The song was almost over anyway. “Neon heart, dayglow eyes…” 

U2 is, was, and will always be the worst 8and in existence.

 


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heads up: I actually love U2. My best friend and her boyfriend, however, agree with Vriska and have this seething hate that I thought would be a fun Vriska quirk.   
> Vriska and I do both love RHCP though.

"On time" is relative in a place like Sgrub. Vriska rolled in about five minutes late, and no one commented. Terezi nudged her ribs in greeting, a bit harder than usual, but said nothing about her arrival time. It was a typical evening shift, with a smattering of in-shop customers and a steady flow of delivery orders. Midterms were coming on and it was showing in the large orders and temperamental customers. Karkat was haggling with a customer over an expired coupon, and the phone was ringing off the hook. 

"Su8ur8an Gru8 Pizzaria, Vriska speaking, how can I 8e of service this evening?" Vriska enquired politely, receiver already cradled between her jaw and ceramic shoulder. 

"Hey, I'd like to order something sweet for pick-up?" A suggestive voice on the other end, a man's voice, made Vriska's skin crawl.  

"Well, sir. We have apple pies?" It came out as a question, and she swore mentally. Now this asshole thought he was under her skin, though he could mess with her. 

"Well baby, I'd certainly like a taste of your apple pie." If Vriska's eyes could roll any further, they'd have been able to watch her repressed memories projected on a big screen on the back of her skull. "But how 'bout you make me two large Meaty Supreme's and a little somethin' on the side?" Karkat was unfortunately still trying to fix his coupon conundrum and was missing her frantic eye contact, and she couldn't think of a way to call Terezi over and ask her how rude she could be to a guy like this and keep her job. 

She sighed. "Sure, whatever 8ro. Anything else?" She punched some codes into the computer, typing in each topping individually to charge this tool as much as humanly possible.

"We'll talk about that when I get there, babygirl." There was a click and the line went dead. Vriska huffed and walked back to her station to make some Meaty Supremes.

"WH4T W4S TH4T?" Terezi asked her, clapping a floury hand on her shoulder. "YOU SOUND3D MOR3 4WKW4RD TH4N 4 PR3T33N IN 4 PORN STOR3." She had already tossed and laid out the dough flats and was midway through saucing the first one. 

"Dude on the phone was waaaaaaaay 8roey. Real creep, trying to 8ooty call me when I don't even know who he is. 8luh." She purposely spread too little sauce and cheese on the dough flat in front of her, contemplating spitting.

Terezi laughed. "N4STY. W3 C4N TOT4LLY SP1T 1N H1S P1ZZ3." Her lips pursed and a little saliva dripped onto the crust. Vriska giggled, but didn't join in. She haphazardly dumped random meat on the pizzas and shoved them into the oven before Terezi could critique them. They worked on legitimate orders for a half hour, during which poor Karkat finally just gave that raging mother of four her twenty percent off. He then proceeded to lock himself in his office. So when the creepy caller walked in and asked for his pizza, Vriska was left to her own devices. Or so she thought.

Creepy Bro swaggered up to the counter, Greek letters prominently displayed on his chest, jacket, and snapback, pants ill-fitting. He leaned across the counter and called back into the kitchen, "Pickin' up two meaties from the hottie on the phone!" Vriska slumped over to the counter with the pizzas boxed and stacked. "Hey there baby. How about that sweetness on the side, huh?" He placed his hand over hers as he took the boxes. That was when Vriska had absolutely had enough.

"Listen, you creepy 8astard, I don't know who you think you are, 8ut I swear to God if you touch me again you'll 8e waking up in a hospital 8ed with no 8alls to speak of and a blockage in your right lung." She jerked her hand out from under his.

"Wow, bitch, learn to take a fucking compliment," the bro sneered. "You're not even hot, what's with the fucked up arm? How do you think you're gonna earn your tips when you're ugly and fat and a huge bitch?"

Vriska took a deep breath, preparing to annihilate this guy, but Terezi was beside her now, and was much, much quicker. She was wearing as snarl of pure condescension, eyes narrowed, lip curled, nose upturned like she was smelling something putrid. She leaned toward him, slow and casual like a predator sizing up prey. Then she laughed, a cackle that made Vriska's hair stand up. "3W," Terezi said, still slow and predatory, teeth showing to reveal just how scary that odd smile could be. "WHO 1NV1T3D TH1S LOS3R?" She made a big show of pretending to look him up and down, then inhaled deeply. "SM3LLS L1K3 TR4SH 1N H3R3, 1 C4N S3NS3 TH3 PROP3RTY V4LU3 DROPP1NG BY TH3 S3COND,"she told Vriska, not even bothering to acknowledge the boy in front of her, who had pulled out his wallet and left his mouth gaping open. "DON'T WORRY, K1DDO, W3 DON'T W4NT YOUR MON3Y, YOU C4N PUT 1T 4W4Y." She waved a hand dismissively, still grinning unnervingly. 

"I'd like to speak with your manager," he said, tone uncertain. This was when Karkat chose to return from his tantrum. And he'd heard more than enough. Ears still tinged red, he opened his mouth and began roaring...at the customer?

"ON WHAT SHITHOLE PLANET WERE YOU RAISED THAT YOU THINK YOU CAN SPEAK TO WOMEN LIKE THAT? THAT YOU CAN SPEAK TO ANYONE LIKE THAT?" 

Terezi grabbed Vriska's hand and pulled her back to the kitchen, choking back giggles. Vriska was in awe. "What the fuck was that?" She asked, dazed. 

"1 D1DN'T L4Y 1T ON TOO TH1CK, D1D 1?" Terezi asked.

"No, not one 8it too much, you're the a8solute 8est." Reality had set in, and Vriska was laughing hard now. Terezi snorted.

"1'V3 D34LT W1TH GUYS L1K3 TH4T COM1NG 1N H3R3 TOO M4NY T1M3S. 4ND K4RK4T 4PPROVES, HE H4T3S TH4T SH1T."

Vriska was leaning on the table now, tears of laughter streaming down her face. "You were just...so awesome! You...'smells like trash in here' oh my god!" She dissolved into giggles. Terezi was laughing too, that weird hiccup-inducing laugh she couldn't really control, the one Vriska had only heard once or twice while Terezi watched Judge Judy between classes. Vriska could feel her abs aching. Karkat walked back into the kitchen, fuming. 

"WELL LADIES, YOU'RE WELCOME. THAT GUY'S NEVER COMING BACK. I LET HIM TAKE HIS PIZZA THOUGH, I'M ASSUMING YOU DID SOMETHING TERRIBLE TO IT." He was red-faced and still raging, but there was a touch of what may have been a smile behind it. 

"1 SP1T 1N 1T. 1 TH1NK VR1SK4 US3D D4IY4 CH33S3 1N PL4C3 OF MOZZ4R3LL4 BY 4CC1D3NT, BUT TH4T SH1T'S WORS3 TH4N SP1T R34LLY." 

"GREAT. I DOUBT HE'LL EVEN NOTICE, BUT YOU CAN SAVOR THAT VICTORY TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT." Then, in an unexpected aside, he turned to Vriska. "ARE YOU OK?"

"Sure I am. 8est I've ever 8een." Vriska was still laughing, and she could feel leftover tears smudging her eyeliner. 

"GOOD." Karkat looked unsure for a moment before coming back to his senses. "NOW GET BACK TO WORK, THIS IS A JOB NOT A PLAYGROUND."

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

At the end of the night Terezi strapped herself into the passenger seat of Vriska's car, slumping back against the seat and opening a small box of cheesy breadsticks in her lap. Before Vriska had even started the car she'd shoved a stick and a half into her mouth. "W4NT 4 P13C3?" she asked through a maw full of bread and cheese and garlic. 

Vriska laughed and grabbed the half left in Terezi's hand, eyes on the rearview as she backed out. "Just a half, thanks. And thanks again, for 8eing so great earlier."

Before Terezi could respond, an odd sound erupted from Vriska's pocket.

"Get turnt, get real turnt, get turnt, get real turnt..."

"1S TH4T R2D2 1N TH3 BLR SK3TCH?" Terezi asked incredulously.

Vriska avoided answering this by answering the phone. "Hello? Oh, heeeeeeeey there fussyface. No, I'm not 8usy, just heading 8ack from work-"

Terezi snatched Vriska's phone. "NO T4LK1NG 4ND DR1V1NG. H3Y, K4N4Y4." She paused, listening. "NO, SH3 D1DN'T M3NT1ON 4 MURD3R MYST3RY D1NN3R, TH4T SOUNDS GR34T! W3'D LOV3 TO JO1N YOU. 7 PM? 4BSOLUT3LY. 1'LL L3T MY BOSS KNOW 1N 4 MOM3NT. TH4NKS SO MUCH, 1'M 3XC1T3D! OK, T4LK TO YOU SOON. BY3." Terezi turned to Vriska. "MURD3R MYST3RY D1NN3R, HUH?"


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, thanks for being so patient with me. I'm having some trouble pinpointing the endgame of this fic, so it might hit another hiatus soon, but not for another couple chapters at least.
> 
> I was wondering: if I wrote a companion fic for this one about Vriska and Kanaya's relationship and/or one about Kanaya and Rose's relationship, would you be interested? Let me know in the comments, I have some ideas and I'm really excited about it.
> 
> And Homestuck ends soon! Hope you guys are excited. I'm going to be clinging to this fandom in my cold dead hands, but I'm also planning on posting some Adventure Time stuff soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, thanks for being so patient with me. I'm having some trouble pinpointing the endgame of this fic, so it might hit another hiatus soon, but not for another couple chapters at least.
> 
> And Homestuck ends soon! Hope you guys are excited. I'm going to be clinging to this fandom in my cold dead hands, but I'm also planning on posting some Adventure Time stuff soon.

Terezi bounced in her seat the whole way home. "GONNA B3 4 R41NBOW RUMPUS MURD3R MYST3RY!" she exclaimed, drumming on her knees to the rhythm of the song on the radio. 

"So when is this murder mystery, anyway?" Vriska asked her, exasperation tempered with amusement. 

"TOMORROW N1GHT," Terezi said, poking Vriska in the cheek. "W3'R3 GONN4 B3 JUST1C3 W4RR1ORS!"

Vriska swatted her hand away and parked the car in her space outside the apartment building. "Suuuuuuuure, 8ecause there's a8solutely no way you're gonna 8e the murderer, is that it? That's not how it works, 8ud. I won't spoil it for you, 8ut you don't get to decide who your character is. Aren't you on kitchen duty tomorrow?"

Terezi pouted for a moment, then brightened. "TH3R3'S NO W4Y K4N4Y4 WOULD M4K3 M3 TH3 MURD3R3R. SH3'S MY FRIEND," she said confidently. "4ND N3P3T4 N33DS HOURS, 1'LL T3LL H3R SH3 C4N T4K3 TOMORROW N1GHT." She followed Vriska into the apartment, chattering about justice and friendship and whatever else, Vriska couldn't even pretend to pay attention. She threw herself on the futon and kicked off her Docs. Terezi plopped down next to her, slinging her legs across Vriska's lap. This was rapidly becoming their post-work routine. Vriska flipped on Netflix.

"What do you want to watch, nerd?" she asked. "I'm thinking a8out either the X Files or Fringe."

"X F1L3S 1S GOOD. 1'V3 ONLY GOTT3N TO S34SON 6 SO F4R." Terezi was snuggled up on the couch, legs wiggling, knees draped across Vriska's thighs. She toed off her flats and wiggled her toes.

"That's a8solutely disgusting," Vriska assessed mildly, wrinkling her nose. "8ut I've already finished the X Files, so we can start wherever you remem8er."

They sat like that comfortably for a while, Terezi's feet on the arm of the futon and Vriska resting hers on the coffee table, passing a somewhat stale bag of Cool Ranch Doritos back and forth. Usually, Terezi fell asleep an episode or so in, while Vriska sat up watched until she got tired before nudging Terezi until she woke up so they could go to bed. Tonight though, Vriska barely made it ten minutes into Mulder and Scully's paranormal investigation before she crashed, hard. She woke dazed, not sure what time it was or where she was. The room was dim, tilted, and warm. Her face was rested on something soft, and there was a hand stroking her hair, scratching lightly and somewhat absently at her scalp. As she blinked slowly, she realized she'd leaned sideways onto Terezi's thigh, pulling her legs up onto the futon so she was nearly in fetal position, her back pressed against the cushion and so she was spooning Terezi's legs. She felt her cheeks burn and started to sit up, but the couch was warm and soft and Terezi's hand in her hair was soothing, and she found herself sinking back into sleep. 

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The sun was streaming through the living room window when Vriska woke up the next morning. An afghan was thrown over her legs, and she was alone, but she could hear the shower running a room away and a familiar voice singing what sounded like Ludo's Love Me Dead. She smiled and headed into the kitchen to warm up some leftovers before class. She had to admit, she was confused by how a summery smile was spread across her face like butter, hazy and bright despite it being eight in the morning before a double lecture. But it was nice to eat some farina from the pot she'd made for lunch yesterday, with salt and molasses and sugar, and listen to the sound of running water and Terezi alternately singing and shouting. This was nice. Comfortable. It made her a little anxious, the edge on the back of this perfect morning. There it was, that wave of uncertainty behind the dam, threatening to take over and drown her, questions upon questions that were only half-formed. Why? How? What If? She sighed and put her dish in the sink. Time for class. 

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Classes were long, and Vriska caught herself tapping her pencil anxiously in lecture and lab alike, ready to be off for the weekend. Fridays were always so long, and as much as she loved her chem class, by three pm she was chewing her nails and packing her bag, already almost out the door before her professor had even told them to have a good weekend. She hurried back to the apartment to find Terezi laying on the futon cackling at an episode of Maury, dressed in a pair of pinstriped cigarette pants and a button down. 

"Woooooooow," she said, jokingly stretching out the vowel. "You look fancy."

"JUST DR3SS1NG L1K3 4 PRO. LOOK1NG TH3 P4RT SO K4N4Y4 W1LL M4K3 M3 TH3 D3T3CT1V3."

"Or may8e a gangster. Got a fedora anywhere?" Vriska teased. She dumped her messenger bag on the floor and headed back to her room to change. Being fancy didn't matter much to her, but she knew Kanaya would expect her to make an effort. She pulled a clean black tee shirt dress from the back of her closet and shrugged into an oversized kimono-style drape in cream and maroon flowers on a black silk backdrop. It may have been Kanaya's, or her sister's, or maybe someone left it here back when she still threw parties, but it was pretty and silky and matched her Docs so it would do nicely. 

"4R3 YOU R34DY? HURRY UPPPPPPP!" Terezi shouted. Vriska swiped some winged eyeliner over her smudgy, smoky look that was leftover from the night before. If she squinted, it almost looked like she'd done it on purpose. 

"Coming!" She shouted, stepping into her boots and clumping out into the living room. Without looking back, she opened the door. "I'll race ya!" she said, and was off like a shot, outrunning the whining sounds Terezi made and her shouts of "TH4T'S NOT f41R YOU CH34T3R G3T B4CK H3R3!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was wondering: if I wrote a companion fic for this one about Vriska and Kanaya's relationship and/or one about Kanaya and Rose's relationship, would you be interested? Let me know in the comments, I have some ideas and I'm really excited about it.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you didn't know, my f key is broken on my computer and it's really hard to get a capital letter that I can copy and paste. I promise I'll fix my lower case fs ASAP, but I wanted this update up before the end of 4/13. I love you all!

Vriska won the race to the car, to the surprise of no one. Slightly more surprising, however, was how long it took to actually get on the road. They stopped for wine first, spending an inordinate amount of time choosing because Terezi insisted that Vriska read every bottle aloud to her, “W1TH 3XPR3SS1ON YOU SOULL3SS TW4T, L1K3 YOU’R3 4L1V3.” Then they got stuck in traffic on the freeway, behind an accident that took up three lanes of traffic and turned the road into a parking lot for a good ten miles. They spent the time playing a strange version of I Spy in which Terezi described smells and Vriska tried to guess them. 

“YOU’R3 NOT H4Lf B4D 4T TH1S,” she told Vriska, looking delighted.

“Of course I’m not, I’m the 8est at everything,” Vriska had replied breezily, laughing when Terezi stuck her tongue out at her and blew a raspberry. 

Eventually the traffic moved, as traffic does, and when the two arrived at Kanaya’s small suburban rental home, they weren’t late, but they weren’t early enough to help Kanaya set anything up. Not that she would have allowed it anyway. Vriska carried the booze and allowed Terezi to get her bearings before she started bothering her like she normally would, all the time forever. 

Kanaya’s doorbell was loud and ominous, a deep resounding bonnnggg that had no business sounding through a tiny bungalow in the suburbs. It never ceased to make Vriska laugh how fussy that sound was, how totally and utterly Kanaya it was, really. Kanaya answered the door much more quickly than usual, in a backless black velvet cocktail dress that stunned her guests into silence for a moment. A short moment, of course, as Vriska was not predisposed to silence regardless of the fine bone structure and smooth olive skin displayed before her. 

“Hey there fussy8utt! Ready to explain to Inspector Rejector over here that she doesn’t get to 8e the detective of this magical mystery tour just 8ecause she’s pure of heart? What are we doing, pulling from a hat?” She barged in past Kanaya, half dragging Terezi through the foyer and into the living room. 

“Hello, Vriska. Your Characters Have Been Randomly Assigned Through The Seats You Choose At The Table This Evening.” She motioned toward the dining room door, at which point Rose chose to pop her head out.

“Choose wisely, or else you may be the first to die,” she said in a deep, affected tone, wiggling her fingers in a mock-ghostly way before disappearing across the entryway into the kitchen from which delicious smells were emanating. Vriska made to plop down in whatever empty chair was closest to the door, but Terezi jerked her arm sharply. 

“1 H4V3 TO 1NV3ST1G4T3 34CH S34T TO B3 SUR3 W3’R3 PL4C3D CORR3CTLY!” she explained indignantly. Vriska rolled her eyes and leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, watching Terezi pick her way around the room and snoop at each seat, laughing like a hyena every time a seat was occupied, much to the discomfort of the seated party.

Sighing to demonstrate her exasperation, Vriska began introducing people to her weird roommate. “Terezi, you know Equius, Nepeta, Eridan. Nepeta, shouldn’t you be at work?”

Nepeta frowned at Terezi. “Karkitty nefur told you? He cancelled your shift, he didn’t need two people in the kitchen tonight. When I called he purromised he’d let you know it was taken care of.”

“Typical Karkat. Anyway, beside Nepeta are Sollux and Aradia.” Sollux said greeted them with a nod and a gruff “hey.”  Aradia just simmered, as she always did when she was forced into a social situation with Vriska, glaring. Sollux laid a hand over one of hers soothingly, and Vriska gulped audibly before moving on. “Tavros is here, you know Toreadork.” Vriska’s eyes skimmed the dark room and saw another familiar face.

“John?” Vriska said, surprised. “How do know Kanaya?”

John laughed. “I don’t! But Rose and I have been friends forever. She just wanted to bring all her friends together, I guess.”

Vriska laughed. “Lalonde isn’t that sentimental. She’s in it for our suffering, one way or another, you can 8et on it.” 

Rose chose that moment to return from the kitchen, bringing some people Vriska didn’t recognize. 

“Always and forever, Vriska. Just for you.” She blew a mocking kiss. “Because I utterly adore watching you suffer.” She gestured to the people beside her. “I brought some fellow sufferers even, as a show of solidarity. Dave, Jade, go on and mingle with the people.”

Vriska opened her mouth to speak, but stopped when she saw a brilliant grin spread across Terezi’s face. “D4V3 STR1D3R! f4NCY S331NG YOU H3R3.”

The boy, Dave, was sandy-haired and freckled. He grinned easily at them both. “Hey there, TZ, what’s cookin? How’ve you been?”

“GOOD.” Terezi settled her hands on the backs of two chairs. “VR1SK4, W3R’3 S1TT1NG H3R3. 1’M NOT SUR3 WH1CH 1S WH1CH, BUT TH4T’S OK.”

Vriska sat, tipping her chair back on two legs and turning to Dave. “So how do you know Terezi?” she asked conversationally.

Dave coughed and scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “We sorta dated for a while, no big. Just a couple of months. We’re chill though, just bros.”

Vriska had expected Terezi to chime in there somewhere, but she was uncharacteristically quiet. She turned to find that Terezi was facing John.

“Oh, yeah, Vriska and I go way back! She was my first girlfriend ever,” he was telling her, typically goofy in tone, gesturing as he spoke. Oh. Awkward. Vriska looked back at Dave, but he was talking to the cute little bespectacled girl beside him.

Luckily, before Vriska had a chance to feel awkward, Kanaya entered the room and slowly dimmed the lights.

“You Will All Note That There Is A Small Stack Of Notecards On Each Of Your Plates. I Would Ask That Each You Turn Over The Top Card. ONLY The Top Card,” she specified, glaring at Vriska and Eridan. 

Vriska stuck out her tongue and flipped her card. It took a moment to sink in, but when she turned to look at Terezi snorted. “Let me see your card.” She grabbed it from Terezi’s plate, trying to keep a straight face. “Inspector’s spouse, huh? Sounds like the 8est character.” Vriska couldn’t hold back her giggles now, and Terezi frowned.

“1 DON’T S33 WH4T’S SO fUNNY,” she growled.

“Oh, hush, you don’t ever see anything. 8esides, you should 8e eternally grateful to have the honor of 8eing my lovely wife.”

“S3R1OUSLY? YOU’R3 TH3 1NSP3CTOR? TH4T’S R1D1CULOUS!” Terezi sulked, chin in hands and leaning on the table. She probably would have complained at great lengths, but Kanaya was serving dinner and it was hard to complain with the smell of paneer makhani filling the air and a sudden clattering of silverware. 

“WH4T’S YOUR D34L W1TH TH4T 4R4D14 G1RL? 1’V3 f3LT H3R ST4R1NG 4T US 4LL N1GHT,” Terezi whispered, and to her credit, it was much quieter than Vriska would have expected from her. Still, she was uncomfortable.

“We were friends in high school. There was an accident in our LARP group, I accidentally busted her in the head pretty hard. Massive concussion. I’ll 8e honest, I was all a8out kicking her ass, 8ut I didn’t expect to do any lasting damage. 8ut she’s hated me since.”

“C4N’T R34LLY BL4M3 H3R,” Terezi answered frankly through a mouthful of food. “BUT 1T’S B33N 4 LONG T1M3. GOT TO K33P TH3 P4ST B3H1ND YOU, f4R 3NOUGH TH4T 1T C4N’T B1T3 YOU 1N TH3 4SS.”

As they ate, everyone went around the table and introduced themselves. Dave was a professor, Jade a sport hunter, Sollux an IT consultant, Aradia an archaeologist, John a comedian, Equius a jocky, Nepeta his wife and a nanny. When it came to the last person, Eridan cleared his throat and looked deeply uncomfortable. “Wwell, my card says I’m the IT consultant’s spouse.” He glared at Sollux. “Wwe’re separated.” Vriska suppressed a laugh and whispered to Terezi, “Sollux dated Eridan’s ex. Things are tense there.” Terezi snorted into her plate. Everyone continued eating and chatting, making up elaborate backstories for their characters and drinking the weird, elaborate cocktails Rose had passed around the table. She and Kanaya were mediators, without specific character names. Just bodies in the room, making sure everything ran smoothly. As dinner was winding down, Kanaya tinged her fork against her glass.

“I Would Like You All To Have A Look At Your Second Card Please,” she said. “Do Not Share What It Says With Anyone Right Now.”

Rose peered over Terezi’s shoulder and whispered some things in her ear. Vriska sighed. So much for that little bit of cheating. She checked her own card. “Remem8er to read 8etween the lines, and 8e sure to ask questions. Stay where you are.” The lights shut off abruptly. Someone screamed, and there were sounds of motion coming from all around. When the room lit up again, everyone was in different places, and Equius was laying on the ground at a strange angle, a note pinned to his chest. With a nod from Kanaya, Vriska rushed over to grab the note. “No8ody move!” she shouted, and everyone froze. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, who do you think the killer is? Let me know in the comments!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SO SORRY it took so long to post this chapter. It was a real challenge for me, and I might make some changes to it later, but the killer is all set and the clues are there. Play Nancy Drew, good luck!

Nepeta was beside Equius, giggling. “Seriously, Equius? You have got to be kitten me. You didn’t even make it ten minutes. Wow, you’re really sweaty too. Ew.”  
“I am dead, Nepeta, you cannot reign in your teasing for a moment or two? I can’t talk to you, I’m being a corpse.” She kicked him teasingly, and he winced. “Nepeta, I am STRONG, I can take a kick, but you are acting entirely inappropriately and you need to-”  
Kanaya dropped a towel on Equius’s face. “I Prepared for The Eventual. It Seemed Appropriate.”  
Terezi cleared her throat. “1 TH1NK 1T’S T1M3 TH4T MY W1f3 4SK3D YOU 4LL SOM3 QU3ST1ONS R3G4RD1NG YOUR WH3R4BOUTS DUR1NG TH3 MURD3R 4ND YOUR L1NKS TO TH3 D3C34S3D.” She nudged Vriska.   
“Oh right.” She turned to Nepeta. “Where were you approximately 8 minutes ago, when Mr. Zahack was 8rutally murdered?”  
“Talking to Jade. I was amewsed by a joke that she told, and I was laughing, but when the lights went out, I heard her scream from further away.”  
Jade spoke up from a few feet away. “I was afraid!” she said, clinging to Dave’s arm now. “It was dark and really kind of scary, I wasn’t ready for that.”   
“What a8out the rest of you?” Vriska asked, swiveling to look around the room at the scattered partygoers.   
“I was right here, Tavros, John, and I were chatting it up, busting out some sick rhymes and shit, being rad.” Dave nodded at Tavros.   
“Um, yeah!” Tavros agreed, fiddling with the ends of his shirt. “Being rad!”  
“I wa2 an2wering my phone, I’m on call from work today.” Sollux was in a corner with Aradia, who nodded. “I was with him, nagging him to hang up.” She looked at Vriska with a wry smile. “Eridan was glaring at us from a distance.”  
Vriska choked out a startled laugh. “What else is new?” She looked at the card on Equius’s chest. “8e cautious. Don’t jump to conclusions.” She tossed the card. “Useless.” She turned to Terezi, who huffed a sigh and grabbed Vriska's arm. "TH3 f1RST MURD3R 1SN'T GO1NG TO CR4CK TH3 C4S3 4LL BY 1TS3Lf. L3T'S M1NGL3."   
Rose nodded approvingly. "Vriska, if you are finished with the first round of questions, there will be coffee and games in the living room." She turned without a word, waiting for the rest to follow after.   
Vriska leaned to Terezi and muttered, "You sure Rose isn't the killer? I know she can't 8e, 8ut she's 'murder' written allllllll over her."  
Terezi snorted. "TOO 34SY. SH3 WOULDN'T B3 SO C4LM 1f 1T W4S H3R."  
There was more than enough coffee to go around, and everyone settled into a few card games around the room. Aradia, Eridan, Dave, John, and Jade were playing a rather violent game of spoons at the coffee table. Vriska and Terezi played Rummy with Nepeta, Sollux, Rose, and Kanaya. It was strange, the way everyone kept eyeing one another suspiciously, as if Equius (who was sitting in the other room drinking his own coffee, Kanaya had seen to it) was really dead and they were all at risk. At Vriska's vantage point, it was clear that almost no one trusted one another, with the exception of Nepeta and Jade, who seemed just as genial as they had before the game began. She watched all their faces, barely going through the motions of her own game. Aradia was subtly sneaking a spoon from the center of the table and, noticing Vriska staring her down, she gave her a nod. Vriska nodded back, trying not to appear taken aback, and busied herself with her cards.   
A few rounds later Kanaya stood and cleared her throat. "Please Take This Moment To Locate Your Next Card And Read It Silently," she told them, then leaned over to Terezi to read her card. Vriska pulled the crumpled stack from her pocket. "'Take nothing for granted. No one's behavior is meaningless.' What kind of 8ullshit fortune cookie is this?" She muttered, stuffing it back into her jeans pocket. The lights blinked off and the room was cave dark, darker than the dining room had been. Vriska would never have admitted that it was spooky, but she felt a chill as darkness fell and her friends shuffled around. The room was again flooded with light, and the scene had changed substantially.  
The coffee table was flipped, cards scattered across the floor. Eridan was laying on his back on top of it. He didn't have a note on his chest, and he was making a rather indignant face. He opened his mouth to speak but Kanaya shook her head warningly, lips tight, and his eyes and mouth closed. Jade was lingering near the door, not far from the body, but Nepeta and Aradia were standing the closest. Aradia and Dave were standing a bit further back, and Sollux was still in his chair. Vriska calculated for a moment.  
"We're missing someone. Where's John?" No one answered. "Some8ody has to know where John is, come on!"   
It was at this moment that John walked into the room. "What'd I miss, guys?" He looked around and it seemed to dawn on him that he'd missed something important. "Oh. Oh wow."  
"You were missing from the scene of the crime, John," Vriska said. "Do you have an ali8i?"  
John's cheeks flushed. "I was in the bathroom Vriska! It's not a crime to pee."  
Terezi opened her mouth, probably to tell John that it actually could be a crime to pee, but Vriska cut her off. "Terezi, what a8out you? Where were you?"  
"1 W4S R1GHT N3XT TO YOU TH3 WHOL3 T1M3 VR1SK4. 1 H4V3N'T MOV3D 4 ST3P." She made a face. "SHOWS HOW MUCH YOU P4Y 4TT3NT1ON TO TH1S M4R14G3."  
Vriska rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, 8e a 8etter wife. I'll put it on the list." She turned to Aradia. "Where were you when Eridan was killed?"  
"I was at the table when the lights went out. I felt something moving in front of me and I backed up into someone. When the lights came on, Dave was next to me."  
Dave shrugged. "I was mad close to the table when the lights went out, and I wanted to be away from what was probably gonna be a crime scene."  
Jade laughed from her place by the door. "That's sort of what I was thinking too. Get away from the murderer."  
"Some8ody hasn't moved. Nepeta, why are you just sitting there next to a dead 8ody."  
Nepeta stared up at her, eyes wide. "I was furrightened, Vriskers! I furroze, I couldn't move if I tried!" She looked genuinely afraid.  
"Hey, I didn't move either." Sollux was sitting, arms crossed, in the seat next to Terezi's. "It'2 pointle22, if I die, I die."  
"POS1T1V3," Terezi commented dryly.   
"Shush!" Vriska hissed, eyes closed. She was focused, trying to piece together something just out of her reach. There was something about where everyone was standing, something that just didn't quite sit right with her, but she couldn't grasp it. If she could just focus-  
Terezi was tugging on Vriska’s sleeve frantically, “VR1SK4, VR1SK4, 1 KNOW WHO TH3 K1LL3R 1S, 1T’S-” she flipped her final card and Kanaya whispered in her ear. “D4MM1T!” The lights switched off, bathing the room in darkness, and when they flipped back on, Terezi was lying facedown on the ground, swearing quietly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This cliffhanger won't leave you waiting like the last one did, but hit me up in the comments: who's the killer?


	18. Chapter 18

Vriska frowned down at the "dead" girl on the floor. “Seriously Terezi? A8out to tell me who the murderer is and you die? That’s 8ullshit.”  
Terezi shrugged on the floor. “1 D1DN’T M4K3 TH3 RUL3S.” She was silenced by a gentle nudge in the ribs by Kanaya’s toe.  
Vriska looked at her remaining suspects. Dave, John, Sollux, Jade, Nepeta, and Aradia. She decided to try a new track. "Why don't you all tell me who you think might 8e the murderer?" She looked at each of them, long and hard and watching them squirm. "Aradia," she said suddenly, surprising even herself. "Who killed my wife?" Behind them, Rose snorted.  
"Uh. If I had to choose someone, I guess I'd pick John." John looked crestfallen. "I'm sorry John, but you disappeared for an entire round. No alibi."  
"Well, I think the killer is Sollux." John pointed across the room. "He's just sitting over there, brooding, look at him!"  
Sollux snorted derisively. "2ure, Egbert. Read my realism as cynicism. Nepeta'2 your killer, no doubt. 2he'2 been having way too much fun."  
"Me? That would be a cat-astrphe. I'm certain the killer is Aradia. She's purrfectly calm, it's unnatural!"  
Arguing broke out, and Vriska didn't bother to shush them. She'd heard what she wanted, and the bickering was just white noise now. There was a lot to think about. Dave’s denials, John’s shadiness. Sollux being terse...well. Being Sollux, really. But was there more to it than that? And Aradia, being more friendly than usual. And Nepeta, acting like nothing was different at all....  
“May8e… I might know the killer.” She looked around the room. “I’m ready to m8ke my final answer.” Kanaya wasn’t there, but Rose nodded gravely, ready to confirm or deny. “The killer……..is Jade.”  
Jade gasped. “Me? I would never!” But Rose was nodding, laughing.  
“Give it up Jade. Your twisted reign of terror is over, you will never harm another human being again.” She made a big show of pretending to cuff her friend, still chuckling.  
“Jade, you were too innocent. All 8right eyed and sweet, it was way to 8oring for a friend of Rose. You were trying to throw me off, right?” Jade nodded. “And your ali8is were shit, really. You were ‘trying to find Dave 8ecause you were scared,’ huh? I was suspicious of a lot of people, 8ut your lies just seemed the flimsiest.” She grinned and Dave clapped her on the shoulder in congratulations.  
“MY LOV3LY W1fE BROUGHT M3 B4CK fROM TH3 GR4V3 W1TH TH3 POW3R Of JUST1C3.” Terezi tackled Vriska, laughing. “1’M JUST SO BL3SS3D!”  
“Ew, Terezi, get off of me!!!!!!!!” Vriska struggled, laughing. “I’m going to kill you all over again, stop!” Terezi refused to let go, hanging on with her arms around Vriska’s neck.  
Kanaya bustled back in, carrying a brassy tray laden with food. “Is Anyone feeling Up To Some Desserts? I Have Pastry And Ice Cream!” Immediately, everyone was clamboring for a dish and some sweets, Terezi still keeping one arm around Vriska’s shoulders casually.  
“TH4NKS fOR 4V3NG1NG M3, MY LOV3LY W1f3.” She licked Vriska’s cheek, tongue cold from ice cream and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.  
“Ew Terezi, what the hell???????? Get off my 8ack, you’re grooooooooss.” She tried to pull away, but Terezi had an iron grip and had already moved on, talking to Tavros across Vriska and eating one of the kolaczki that Rose had provided. Vriska laughed softly and turned to catch up with John, letting Terezi’s weird grip become comfortable and leaning in just a bit. Not too much though. No need to give her any weird ideas.  
A few cups of coffee and some krusczicki later, Terezi was blinking slowly and her rapidfire speech had slowed to a crawl. Vriska enjoyed the social atmosphere, listening to a much saucier Jade tell embarrassing stories about high school friendship with John, Dave and Rose, including a tragic prom accident involving Dave, a corsage, a puppet, and ten gallons of apple juice. It was especially good to catch up with John, who she hadn't seen in years. But as fun as it was, Vriska caught herself yawning more than talking. It wasn't long before Kanaya offered up the pull-out couch.  
"You Have The Longest Drive Of All The Guests, Vriska. I Do Not Mind At All If You Wish To Stay The Night," she said as she and Jade cleared the table. Aradia and Sollux had long since said their goodbyes, and Eridan was taking Nepeta and John home.  
"What a8out it, nerd? Want to crash here tonight?" Vriska poked at Terezi's cheek, and Terezi lazily licked at her.  
"SUR3, WH4T3V3R. 1 C4N SL33P 4NYWH3R3 YOU L1K3." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and Vriska flicked her nose.  
"Sounds like we'll 8e staying the night, Kanaya. Thanks for the offer."  
Pulling out the couch was an ordeal, with John and Dave trying hard to unstick the sagging springs. They were the last to leave, drifting out while Vriska tried to put a fitted sheet on, swearing as it unhooked from the corners at least 8 times before Terezi decided to help. Kanaya popped her head into the living room to say goodnight and Rose wiggled her fingers (and her eyebrows) before following her girlfriend upstairs.  
"Grooooooooss!" Vriska called after them, Terezi cackling behind her from their lumpy mattress. Vriska threw herself down with a groan of overworked springs and pulled the blankets around her. "Did you have fun?" she asked Terezi.  
"4S1D3 fROM B31NG MURD3R3D? SUR3!" She grinned widely. "K4N4Y4 1S 4N 3XC3LL3NT COOK."  
Vriska nodded and yawned. "Glad you had a good time. Goodnight. Don't let the 8ed 8ugs 8ite."  
Terezi curled up in a ball. "VR1SK4?" she said, uncharacteristically quietly.  
"Yeah?" Vriska propped her head up on her hand.  
"YOU'R3 4 PR3TTY GOOD W1f3." Terezi rolled over, her back to Vriska, and seemed to drop off to sleep immediately.  
"I like the sound of that," Vriska thought, before shaking herself in revulsion and turning over to fall asleep and hopefully forget that ever happened.  
"WH4T DO YOU TH1NK fLOW3RS TH1NK 4BOUT?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was short, but I wanted to make sure you knew how it ended. We'll be moving to some new and interesting stuff soon! Thanks for reading guys, it means so much to me!


	19. Chapter 19

Terezi was by far, the oddest roommate Vriska had ever had. She cooked everything in the microwave, wore all of Vriska's clothes, and peed with the damn door open ALL THE TIME, even when Vriska was in the shower. But strangest of all was how some nights, Terezi never came home at all. Once or twice a week, Vriska found herself waiting up entirely too late, hoping Terezi was on her way home. When she sent texts that were not at all frantic, not even a not, Terezi always replied that she was "out" and would be back "later." Later tended to be after work the following day, or when classes were over. 

A week after the murder mystery dinner, Vriska was fed up. She'd had a long day, with a minor lab explosion cinging the ends of her hair in the morning and a short answer test in the afternoon. All she wanted was to lay on the couch and watch some sci- fi garbage with her roommate. They had talked about watching The Man Who Fell to Earth tonight,  and it was the only thing Vriska had looked forward to all day. The weather had gone cold, and the apartment was chilly and quiet. For a few hours, Vriska cleaned and read and killed time. There was plenty to be done, really. It hardly mattered if Terezi came home at all. Eventually, her patience ran out.

"tz where are you?? it's like 8 pm and I'm w8ing for you........"

Not a minute later, her phone buzzed in reply. "OUT. 1'LL S33 YOU TOMORROW. DON'T WORRY ABOUT 1T. 1'LL G3T 4N 4P4RTM3NT SOON." 

What? Vriska read the text at least 8 times. Why did Terezi think she had to find an apartment? 

"????????" She sat and waited for a reply, but nothing came. Exhasparated, she threw on her coat. She'd check Terezi's usual haunts and get an answer herself. 

The law offices were the first place she tried, banging on a locked door until an irritated janitor opened it.

"Learn to read, kid. We're closed."

Vriska took a chance. "8ut I know you've let my friend stay!" she argued. 

The janitor looked shifty. "I have not."

Vriska sighed. "I know it's against the rules, so just tell me if she's here." 

He shook his head. "No one here tonight but me." He pulled his jacket closer around him and shivered. "On a night like tonight, don't you wonder why she wouldnt just go home?" Vriska did wonder. She kept moving.

She checked Sgrub next, and found Nepeta and Karkat working. Nepeta was flirting heavily, and Karkat was oblivious. If she were less annoyed, Vriska would have found this hilarious. As it was she asked the two of them if they knew where Terezi would disappear to. 

"She's come and stayed with me a few times. She says she doesn't like burdening you," Karkat told her. "I haven't talked to her today though. Maybe she's with that batshit crazy study group."

"8ut that was laaaaaaaast night," Vriska whined, then turned to Nepeta. "Do you have any ideas?"

"Are you kitten me? Terezi only talks to me beclaws we work together." Nepeta was refusing to meet Vriska's eyes, and her cheeks were pink.

"Spill, Nepeta." Vriska tapped her door and stared at an invisible watch on her wrist, lips pursed.

Nepeta turned red. "I really don't know fur sure. But I know sometimes she sleeps at the library across campus...when she has a lot of homework." 

Vriska didn't wait for Nepeta to continue, she just rushed out the door. The library was a big, elaborate building across campus. It was always open, always warm, and more inviting than any educational institution had a right to be. Of course she was there! Part of Vriska's mind was still telling her to go home and let Terezi do her own thing. Why couldn't she mind her own business? She hurried up the marble stairs and into the warm foyer. She'd come this far. There was no reason to quit now.

Vriska found Terezi curled up on a couch at the back of the children's literature section, wrapped in a snuggie of all things. Her eyes were closed. Even in her annoyance, that was endearing. Vriska poked her between the eyes.

Terezi's eyes fluttered open. "VR1SK4? WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1NG H3R3?"

What am I doing here?" Vriska snorted. "What are you doing here?" 

Terezi shrugged. "STUDY1NG. 1T'S N34RLY F1NALS."

"Suuuuuuuure you're studying. I couldnt hear any snoring at all." Terezi's cheeks flushed. "Karkat told me you slept at his place a few times too. Why didn't you tell me you felt like a burden?" 

"1 S41D 1 WOULD F1ND 4N 4P4RTMENT. 1 DONT W4NT TO B3 4 PROBL3M, TH4T'S 4LL." Terezi looked sullen, like a child being disciplined for something that wasn't their fault. 

Vriska was taken aback. "8ut you don't have to find an apartment!" she blurted out.

"1 DON'T?" Terezi sounded skeptical.

"I mean, not that I care. 8ut my rent is really high, and it might 8e easier to afford with a roomm8........" she trailed off hopefully. 

Terezi sat and thought for a second. "1 COULD B3 CONV1NC3D TO ST4Y," She mused. "BUT..."

"8ut????????" Vriska exclaimed.

"BUT YOU H4V3 TO CH4NG3 TH3 D4MN SH33TS!"


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to try Terezi's ketchup cookies, you can find her family recipe here:  
> http://www.midcenturymenu.com/2012/12/gumdrop-jumbos-the-secret-ingredient-is-ketchup-the-10-days-of-vintage-christmas-cookies/

Convincing Terezi to stay changed subtle things in the apartment. The sheets, as demanded, were washed weekly. The dishes were washed as well. And the futon...well. It was all but forgotten. Terezi stopped spending long nights "out" without explanation. And Vriska's rent was nearly split in two. It was a pretty sweet deal, really. Terezi didn't mind cleaning, so long as Vriska cooked. And Vriska loved cooking, as long as Terezi could keep her grubby fingers out of whatever she happened to be making.  
  
           "VR1SK4! 1T N33DS MOR3 K3TCHUP!" she'd whine, leaning over the tortellini or French onion soup or whatever else Vriska was making without ketchup in it. "1T'S 1MPORT4NT!"  
  
         Vriska usually ignored her, jabbing her in the ribs with a bony elbow to ward her off until dinner was ready. Sometimes Terezi licked her in an effort to retaliate, but on this point Vriska was solid: ketchup is a disgusting sin and it destroys all things good, without fail.  Terezi's bizarre need to douse everything with it only proved this. Today, it was cookie dough. Of all things! Terezi assured Vriska that it was a family recipe, that it was a hit at parties, and that everyone would love it, but Vriska just hip checked her out of the way. They were having a little post- holiday get- together, and she wanted to make something at least vaguely edible. She thrust the spoon in Terezi's face. "Lick this," she commanded, in her best no- nonsense tone.  
  
"L1CK TH1S!" Terezi mimicked in a mock- seductive tone, but she slobbered all over the spoon just the same. "1T'S GOOD, BUT 1T COULD D3F1N1T3LY US3 SOM3 K3TCHUP," she commented. "WHO D1D YOU 1NV1T3 OV3R?"  
  
Vriska resisted the urge to kick her. "Well, Rose and Kanaya said they'd 8e here. I think Equius is 8ringing Nepeta over. Did you ask anyone?"  
  
"D4V3 M1GHT DROP 1N W1TH JOHN. 4ND K4K4T M4Y B3 OFF WORK TON1GHT, SO H3 S41D H3'D STOP BY." Terezi let the wooden spoon hang between her teeth. "D1D W3 M1SS 4NYON3?"  
  
Vriska shrugged. "May8e? Who knows. I don't really care right now." She slid the cookie tray into the oven. "Kanaya will give me hell about it later anyway." As if on cue, the buzzer went off. "See?"  
  
Terezi snorted. "NO, 1 DONT." She smacked the buzzer. "COM3 ON UP!" Vriska pulled a leftover half- pizza from the fridge and hastily chopped  it into bite- sized pieces. "WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1NG?" Terezi asked curiously.  
  
"I'm m8king pizza 8ites. 8ut I have to get them in the 8roiler fast, 8efore Kanaya gets here and sees how old and stale the pizza is." She did the same with a container of leftover potato skins, sprinkling them with cheese and bacon bits. "We don't talk about this, understood?"  
  
Terezi nodded solemnly. "OF COURS3. 1 W1ILL T4K3 TH3 S3CRET OF HOW D1SGUST1ING YOU 4R3 TO TH3 GR4V3."  
  
Vriska rolled her eyes, and made a noise if disgust for Terezi's benefit. She probably would have had something to say about how the girl who puts ketchup on her ice cream doesn't get to comment on disgusting, but just then Kanaya breezed in holding a platter covered with foil. Rose trailed behind her with a crock pot.  
   
"Tahdig?" Vriska asked hopefully, and Kanaya nodded. "Gr8! And what does little Rosie have?"  
  
Rose grinned. "I heard you like cabbage, so I made halupki." At Vriska's confused look, she clarified. "Cabbage leaves stuffed with ground beef. Can I plug this in somewhere...?" She shrugged her shoulders, demonstrating the weight of the large slow cooker.  
  
Vriska pointed to a cleared spot on the kitchen table that was usually used for school work. There was a power strip beneath it for when she and Terezi both needed to plug in their computers. Kanaya, as was her custom,  bustled around the kitchen making coffee and tea and laying out food, cups, and utensils along the countertop. She took the cookies out of the oven and arranged them artfully on a tray Vriska didn't even know she had. The pizza and potato skins came out last.  
  
"Oh, Vriska, These Smell Delightful!" she exclaimed, inhaling deeply. "Did You Make Them Yourself?"

"You 8et I did!" Vriska told her, as Terezi attempted to disguise her giggles as a coughing fit. "I make the 8est pizza, you know." Terezi snorted, and Vriska shot her a dirty look before remembering for probab8ly the billionth time that it was a waste of energy. She probably would have snapped at her, but it was at that moment Dave decided to climb in the window from the fire escape.  
  
"Hey TZ," he said nonchalantly, setting his backpack down and picking up a cookie. "You didn't make these, did you."  
  
Terezi pouted. Vriska was impressed, but she knew better than to show it. Guys like Dave fed on that. "SHUT UP D4V3," Terezi groused, dipping her cookie sulkily in some ketchup.  
  
John chose this moment to clamor much more gracelessly through the window, falling to the floor in a rosy- cheeked heap. "Whew! Your building sure is tall, Vriska! This makes breaking you out of hour mom's house seem like a breeze!" He wiped sweat off his brow. Vriska flinched at the mention of her mother. "Look!" He said excitedly, thrusting a box under her nose. "We brought Exploding Kittens!" And with what seemed like no social transition, a raucous game began. Nepeta and Equiuus arrived, and Vriska have up her seat at the table to let sweaty take her place. She instead leaned on the kitchen counter and watched, smirking, as Nepeta shouted in his ear.  
  
"TH1S 1S SO INF41R!" Terezi griped. "1 C4NT 3V3N T3LL WH4T TH3 C4RDS 4R3!" Vriska leaned causally on the rungs of Terezi's chair.  
  
"May8e I can help. If you ask niiiiiiiiicely..."  
  
Without even turning, Terezi grabbed Vriska by the front of her pants and yanked her closer. "FUCK1N H3LP M3."  
  
Vriska watched Kanaya and Rose exchange looks from across the kitchen. She shrugged at them helplessly, trying to assure them silently that this was definitely. Platonic. Even as she wedged herself into Terezi's chair, an arm winding casually around her back. The two of them kicked one another under the table idly for a while, and Vriska avoided Kanaya's eye and tried to focus on the game.  
  
Dave was a good player, and an awful lot of time was spent poking fun at him, especially on Terezi's part. That made Vriska feel a little warm, a little grumpy, a littttttle not- at- all- jealous at all. But it was hard to stay jealous when Terezi was enthusiastically braiding her hair to the back of the chair and yelling in her ear. By the end of the night, she was in danger of going deaf.  
  
No game, of course, is any good without a bit of cheating, so Vriska became more and more creative with her cards as the night went on. Equius implored her to stop, but if she was honest, that was half of the fun.  
  
"Jesus TZ, tell your girlfriend to stop cheating," Dave complained, tossing a potato skin at her. Vriska froze, panic setting in. Was she that obvious?  
  
"NOT H3R K33P3R," Terezi said dryly, still leaning across the table. No motion, no panic. Vriska could feel her heart beating in her throat. "S3RKET, STOP CH34T1NG OR 1 W1LL PROS3CUT3 YOU TO TH3 FULL3ST 3XT3NT OF TH3 L4W." She smacked the side of Vriska's head lightly. "4ND K1CK YOUR 4SS." 

Dazed, and still trembling slightly, Vriska managed to elbow Terezi weakly in the ribs. "May8e I wouldn't cheat if you knew how to win." 

Terezi sighed exasparatedly. "1'S NOT 4BOUT W1NN1NG, VR1SK4. IT'S 4BOUT H4V1NG FUN. P3RH4PS YOU'V3 H34RD OF 1T?"

Vriska summed, arms crossed. "Winning is fun," she pouted. She avoided eye contact with Kanaya, who was throwing her pointed looks from across the room with increasing frequency and urgency. "8r8. 8athroom," she said, climbing out of her tangled perch with some difficulty. Terezi's limbs were nigh inextricable, and it didn't help that she was clinging on to be a nuisance. "Ugh, Terezi I have to pee!" she groaned, finally detangling herself and escaping the room.

When the bathroom shut behind her, Vriska sighed and leaned over the sink, splashing some cool water on in her face. What the hell was that? Dave accused them of dating and Terezi just sat there, cool as a cucumber! Was that so unrealistic that Terezi didnt bother to respond? Was she too embarrassed by the idea to say no? Or was it just a big joke? Vriska resisted the urge to slap herself. She loved drama as much as the next girl (more), but that kind of crap was pointless without an audience. It wouldn't clear her head.

'What do I do?' 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is an abrupt cut off but I really needed to post what I had and clear my head. More to follow!


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HUGE TRIGGER WARNING: DEPICTION OF ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP/ABUSIVE EX IN THE NEXT TWO CHAPTERS. 
> 
> I promise I will be posting a mini-summary at the beginning of following chapter to make sure that you have the basic plot if you can't read these chapters. I also promise that all of the characters are going to be ok and that they're safe. Love you guys!

Shifts at Sgrub had become almost monotonously routine. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday Vriska drove Terezi in at around two pm, went to her afternoon engineering course, then clocked herself in at around 3:30. On Thursdays, Terezi was off for seminar and Vriska worked from 6 to close without her. And, confusingly enough, they both worked the morning shift every third Saturday of the month to "MAKE SURE YOU DON'T FORGET HOW TO DO THE REST OF YOUR JOB." It was on one such morning that Vriska found herself up to her elbows in prep work, specifically a vat of sticky pizza dough in need of kneading, shaping, and distribution throughout the freezer shelves.   
  
     "Tereziiiiiiii," she whined, attempting to scrape the sticky dough from her forearms, "help me!"  
  
     Terezi, across the kitchen stirring a cauldron- esque vat of sauce, called back testily, "L1TTLE BUSY VR1S, C4N 1T W41T?"   
  
     Vriska knew if Terezi stopped stirring the pot for more than a moment, the sauce would burn to the bottom. She groaned dramatically. "I guessssssss it can. But if this dough wad absorbs me and I 8ecome a part of it, 8e sure to keep my memory alive 8y 8aking it with anchovies, ok?"   
  
     Karkat, from the front of the shop where he was writing up schedules, shouted back to them, "IF YOU SPENT HALF THE ENERGY WORKING THAT YOU USE UP WITH YOUR INCESSANT BITCHING, YOU'D BE DONE FOR THE DAY!"  
  
     "WH4T, 4ND LOS3 MY HOURS? F4T CHANC3, K4RK4T," Terezi answered. "B3S1D3S, D33P UND3R TH4T THORNY 3XT3R1OR OF YOURS, YOU L1K3 US, OR YOU WOULD H4V3 F1R3D US BY NOW!"  
  
     There was no response to this outside some noncommittal grumbling. Vriska knew Karkat was a big softy on the inside, somewhere beneath his shouty carapace. He had an especially tender spot for Terezi, which he demonstrated by giving her flexible hours and yelling profanities at her at every turn. He put up with Vriska because Terezi liked her and because she was willing to work often. He told her that regularly, irritably, and with the kind of dry annoyance that Vriska had learned to take as affection.

     "I'M NOT ABOUT TO CUT YOUR HOURS WHEN WE'RE UNDERSTAFFED," he finally replied. "THAT WOULD BE A STUPID ASS THING TO DO, REALLY."

     Vriska snorted. "8ecause Nepeta would neeeeeeeever pick up a few extra days per week if you asked her nicely."

     "1 DON'T 3V3N TH1NK SH3'D C4R3 1F YOU W3R3N'T N1C3, K4RKL3S. 1 TH1NK SH3 L11111111K3S YOU." She flicked the wooden sauce spoon at him, splattering him with hot red goo. "YOU M4K3 H3R 4LL FLUSH3D 1N TH3 F4C3 4ND SWOONY..." She cackled loudly, and Vriska couldn't help chiming in.

     Sunshine was streaming through the shop as they worked in a sort of companionable rhythm, interrupted only by the hum of the freezer and the stereo playing Springstein softly. It was a lovely sort of morning, the perfect mix of warm spring sunshine and the cool, fresh breeze of late winter. Terezi kept tossing bits of chopped-up apple core from the pies and tomato tops from the sauce at her and Karkat, making terrible puns. Vriska laughed loud and long as Karkat shouted about "FUCKING WEIRD ASS WOMEN AND THEIR AWFUL SENSES OF HUMOR!" She was mid-cackle, hiding behind the oven with Terezi and waiting for retaliation when the front door opened with a creak, tinkling the bells that hung from the frame and stirring up the dust that Karkat had painstakingly swept into piles. There spiraling dust motes caught the sunlight and gleamed and Karkat looked up from his paperwork to shout at whoever had entered, but froze. Looking back on the moment later, Vriska would say that time slowed down just then, and every detail stood up. In the moment, however, all she could think was how ridiculously dramatic everything seemed. Karkat dropped his pen and stammered as a lanky young man lumbered into the shop. He had a wild mess of wavy ginger hair hanging in his eyes, which were barely in focus. He wore a pair of ridiculously oversized plaid lounge pants on his skinny legs and a floppy greyed tee shirt with the words "I'm not crazy but the voices are" in peeling violet letters across the front. 

     Karkat found his voice. "Gamzee!" he sputtered, ducking out from behind the counter. "What the hell are you doing here, I told you not to come in if you weren't scheduled!" 

     The strange guy, Gamzee, shrugged at him. "Bro, I was just coming in to see if the new schedule was ready. Is my girl working?"

     Vriska looked around at Terezi in confusion, and found no reassurance in her face. She was an ice sculpture, frozen in place with glazed eyes and a tense body. She looked ready to flee, or fight, or shatter into tiny pieces at the slightest touch. Vriska took a step toward her slowly, a hand outstretched hesitantly. "Terezi........who-" she started, but Terezi shook her head violently and shooshed her.

     "1 4M NOT H3R3, VR1SK4. NO M4TT3R WH4T H3 S4YS, DON'T L3T H1M KNOW 1'M HERE!" Her voice was barely over a whisper, gravely and dry, a death rattle. She sounded fierce, and she grabbed Vriska's outstretched hand, her bad hand. "YOU UND3RST4ND?" Vriska nodded and held onto Terezi's hand the best she could and peered out from behind the oven.

     Vriska could see a vein popping in Karkat's neck, a sure sign that he was about to boil over. "GAMZEE, I TOLD YOU, I'LL TEXT YOU WHEN THE SCHEDULE IS UP! YOU CAN'T JUST COME HERE!" He breathed heavily. "AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN, IS YOUR GIRL HERE?"

     The guy, Gamzee, leaned casually on the counter. "wELL, i jUST wAS uP aND mOTHERFUCKIN tHINKING aBOUT mAYBE mAKING tHINGS uP wITH tEREZI, yOU kNOW? wE aLL uP aND fELL aPART, bRO." His eyes wandered hazily, but Vriska had a chilling feeling he was much more clear and focused than he seemed.

     Beside Vriska, Terezi winced. She was trembling with a white-hot, ice-melting rage the likes of which Vriska had never seen before. "H3 TH1NKS H3 C4N 'F1X' THINGS?" she hissed, crushing Vriska's fingers between her own as if she were hanging on for her life.

     "GAMZEE, SERIOUSLY, YOU NEED TO LEAVE HER ALONE. IT'S NOT JUST ME SAYING THAT, IT'S THE FUCKING LAW. SHE TOOK OUT A RESTRAINING ORDER, THAT DOESN'T JUST GO AWAY BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU SHOULD MAKE UP WITH HER!" Karkat was wringing his hands, something Vriska had never seen a person do outside a movie. It looked really fucking stupid, and if the situation hadn't been so serious she would have been laughing.

     Gamzee's demeanor changed like a cloud covering the sun, a slow darkening. Vriska saw that she'd been right all along. "Now Karkat, I asked you a simple MOTHERFUCKING QUESTION. Is she MOTHERFUCKING HERE, brother?" His voice was cold and hard, a sharp edge of a steel blade. Karkat was fidgeting, looking torn between fear and rage. Terezi flinched again, looking smaller by the second, and Vriska was filled with a blinding rage, blue-black and boiling. How dare this man, this BOY, come here and threaten these people who made Vriska laugh, and cry, and feel? How dare he hurt them like this?

     Suddenly, she was detangling her fingers from Terezi's with a gentle "shhhhhhhh..." and storming out of the kitchen, a frozen fire a mile high goddess. She didn't think, didn't breathe, until she was nose to nose with this boy, and the words were falling from her lips. "She's not here." Just as level, just as sharp as Gamzee, she stepped out from behind the counter to circle him like a shark. He looked unnerved. "And even if she were, if you'd 8een a8le to catch her on a work day, why would she want anything to do with you?" Vriska looked him up and down with an expression of obvious derision.

     "aW, sIS, nOW wHO dO yOU mOTHERFUCKIN tHINK yOU aRE cOMING bETWEEN a bRO aND hIS gIRL?" He leaned toward her, like a curious predator fixated on prey.

     "I really dou8t that it matters who I am. 8ut I know who you are," she said, recognition dawning. A conversation with Rose at the food court, where a strange mall employee stood swaying behind a counter, unmoving and unresponsive, for hours on end. "You're that sloppy stoner who stands 8ehind the counter of the Taco Hell and doesn't do a damn thing all day. Yeah, I know who you are," she said scathingly as he looked at her with confusion. "You're a zom8ie, soulless and 8oring. They only way you know how to 8e interesting is to stalk your ex and threaten her?"

     "aND jUST wHO uP aND mOTHERFUCKIN sAID sHE wAS mY eX?" he asked her.

     "You can 8et she sure as hell didn't. she's never said a word a8out you. Guess you're not as interesting as you've 8een led to think." She had stopped circling now, and was leaning toward him, coming in for the kill. "Go crawl 8ack in your hole 8efore I 8ury you in one - permanently." Their faces were nearly touching, and Vriska was rocking upward on the balls of her feet to glare into his eyes. She didn't blink, though her damaged eye burned and watered. 

    There was fear in his eyes, she could see it. He said something, but the blood rushing in her ears was too loud to hear through. "Did you not hear me?" she asked, hearing her own voice as if down a well. "I said get out. Good8ye." His eyes were unfocused, staring right through her, but his posture had changed. The arrogance was gone, replaced by the slinking look of a kicked cat.

     Karkat responded now, in a voice so tired it was as if he'd aged a thousand years in those past few minutes. She wasn't sure, but it sounded like, "Go. Just go." It was the first time she'd heard him lower his voice from a shout, and the sound reminded Vriska of cobwebs being coughed up, gentle but gutteral. Gamzee turned away from her to look at Karkat, and finally, FINALLY she blinked. And in that moment, when she looked away, he was gone. If not for the gentle swirls of dust motes in the early afternoon sunlight, Vriska would think he had never been there at all.

   She turned to face Karkat, who was staring at her with dead eyes. "What the fuck was that????????" she asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I really hope that chapter was ok for everyone! I know it's been so long, and it's kind of cruel to come back with something so heavy. But this was what was meant to happen next, and this story is guiding me more than I could ever guide it. And I know this is short and cliff hanger-y, but this part is really hard to write so I had to split it up into two parts. 
> 
> I really meant to have this up for 4/13, but it just wasn't ready yet. Is 4/20 close enough?


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey folks! This should be the end of the full-chapter trigger warnings, though in the next chapter or two there may be parts of the dialogue to be wary of! At the beginning of next chapter (23) I'll be posting a mini summary that's incredibly brief to catch up anyone who can't read these chapters. I can't say I blame you. Love you all <3

     "Karkat, what the fuck was that?"

    

     Karkat didn't answer her. He walked back into the kitchen, peering behind the ovens and even checking the walk-in freezer. "TEREZI? YOU STILL BACK HERE? HE'S GONE, THE METAPHORICAL COAST IS LITERALLY CLEAR." He turned back to Vriska. "SHE'S GONE. NOT THAT I BLAME HER, BUT DAMN THIS IS WAY TOO FUCKING COMPLICATED." He fumbled with his phone, scrambling to type out a frantic message.              

 

     "Um, helloooooooo? Earth to Karkat. Who was that? What just happened? And where the hell is Terezi????????" Vriska's heart was thudding in her chest.

 

     Karkat held up one finger, reading something on his phone, then some of the tension dissolved from his tight shoulders. "SHE'S ON THE BUS BACK TO CAMPUS. SHE WANTS TO TALK TO PUBLIC SAFETY AND CHECK IN WITH HER PSYCHOLOGIST. SHE SAYS SHE'LL TEXT YOU IF SHE NEEDS A RIDE."

 

     "Ooooooook, but that doesn't answer what in the 8lazes just happened? And I think I deserve to know, 8ecause in case you didn't notice, I'm involved now." Vriska motioned at the door where Gamzee had just exited with an air of someone trying to sweep away bad vibes. 

 

     Karkat picked up his broom and began sweeping his dust piles together. "PUT AWAY THE PREP STUFF, WE'RE CLOSING."

 

     Vriska was aghast. "On a Saturday????????"

 

     "I'M CALLING MY BROTHER TO COME IN EARLY. HE'S A BLOWHARD, BUT HE DOESN'T EXACTLY HAVE A LIFE. AND WHEN I'M DONE EXPLAINING ALL OF THIS RIDICULOUS HORSESHIT TO YOU, I'M ABOUT 99.95% SURE YOU'LL WANT TO GO HOME TOO."

 

     Thinking of Terezi's frozen form hiding quietly behind the oven, Vriska nodded. "To 8e honest, I kind of already do."

_________     

 

     "GAMZEE WAS MY BEST FRIEND GROWING UP. WE LIVED IN TOWN HERE, ABOUT A BLOCK APART FROM EACH OTHER.  HIS DAD WAS NEVER REALLY AROUND, SO HE CAME OVER A LOT. WE DID EVERYTHING TOGETHER, YOU KNOW? WE PLAYED VIDEO GAMES, AND HE'D COME OVER AND HELP OUT IN THE SHOP AFTER SCHOOL. HE'S OLDER THAN ME, SO HE STARTED DRIVING DELIVERY BEFORE I EVEN HAD MY LICENSE. HE SMOKED A LOT OF WEED IN HIGH SCHOOL. MIDDLE SCHOOL TOO, I GUESS, BUT I DIDN'T EXACTLY RECOGNIZE THAT AS A TWELVE YEAR OLD NERD. IT NEVER REALLY SEEMED TO MATTER ANYWAY, IT WAS JUST QUIRKY GAMZEE AND HIS BULLSHIT ANTICS. MY FAMILY DIDN'T SEEM TO NOTICE ANYTHING MY DAD EVEN THREW HIM A GRADUATION PARTY AT THE END OF HIS SENIOR YEAR. HE WAS PART OF THE FAMILY." There was a spark of nostalgia in Karkat's eyes, like he was talking about someone who passed away rather than someone who had just been standing face to face with him. 

 

      "GAMZEE WENT FULL- TIME HERE AFTER HE GRADUATED, GOT HIMSELF AN APARTMENT. HE DIDN'T REALLY HAVE THE KIND OF GRADES TO GET INTO COLLEGE, BUT I'M PRETTY SURE HE WAS OK WITH THAT. HE STARTED PARTYING WITH SOME STONER TOWNIE KIDS LIKE CAL, MADE SOME NEW FRIENDS. WE STILL HUNG OUT SOME, BUT SOMETHING CHANGED AROUND THEN. I STARTED AT THE UNIVERSITY AROUND THEN. THAT'S WHERE I MET TEREZI. SHE WAS A PRE-LAW FRESHMAN AND I WAS A CRIMINAL JUSTICE STUDENT, SO OUR GEN EDS OVERLAPPED. WE STUDIED TOGETHER, DID SOME GAMING TOGETHER,  THAT KIND OF THING. I KIND OF HAD A HUGE CRUSH ON HER." Karkat looked sheepish, and his cheeks flushed. Vriska had never stopped and thought about it before, but it was becoming evident that Karkat still had a huge crush on Terezi. "WHEN SHE SAID SHE NEEDED A JOB, I OFFERED HER A POSITION HERE. THAT'S HOW SHE MET GAMZEE." His face went dark then, and he stared at the ground. "I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER REGRETTED ANYTHING LIKE I REGRET INTRODUCING THOSE TWO. HE'S CHARMING, YOU KNOW? HE TALKS HIS WAY INTO WHATEVER HE WANTS. OUT OF IT TOO. OF COURSE HE MANAGED TO GET TEREZI'S ATTENTION. THE THREE OF US HUNG OUT A LOT AT FIRST. WE'D ALL CHILL AT GAMZEE'S SHITTY LITTLE APARTMENT AFTER WORK. THOSE TWO ARGUED LIKE A PAIR OF WET CATS IN A BAG, ABOUT LAW AND PIZZA AND GOD ONLY KNOWS WHAT ELSE. AND WHEN MY DAD DIED, THEY WERE SO SUPPORTIVE, BUT I WAS KIND OF OFF IN MY OWN LITTLE WORLD. FUCK."  He sagged against the counter. "I DIDN'T REALIZE ANYTHING WAS GOING ON BETWEEN THEM UNTIL I SHOWED UP AT HIS APARTMENT ONE AFTERNOON AND CAUGHT THEM MAKING OUT. IT WAS A SHOCK. I CAN'T SAY I HAD ANYTHING NICE TO SAY TO HIM. OR HER. SO WHEN WE DIDN'T TALK FOR A WHILE, I WASN'T EXACTLY HEARTBROKEN TO HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE TO AVOID THEM. IF I HAD BEEN ABLE TO GET PAST THAT SHIT, I MIGHT HAVE PICKED UP ON THE SIGNS SOONER. SHE STOPPED JOKING AROUND AT WORK, THEN SHE STOPPED LAUGHING. EVENTUALLY SHE STOPPED SMILING AT ALL. IT DIDN'T REALLY REGISTER, YOU KNOW? NOT UNTIL I STARTED SEEING BRUISES."

 

     Vriska gasped involuntarily. She knew where this was going, really, but it was different to hear out loud. Karkat's voice was cracking, and he closed his eyes. She finished covering the the sauce and walked to the front of the shop, plopping down in a booth. Karkat slumped down across from her. "You know you can't 8e 8laming yourself for things like this. It's not your fault. You can't save people. You can only help people who want it."

 

     "I know," he mumbled, not looking up.

 

      He didn't know. Vriska could tell. She knew an awful lot about blaming herself for shit she couldn't control, and it looked an awful lot like this.  "Seriously," she said, as gently as she'd ever spoken to shouty-mc-shout pants Karkat, or maybe anyone at all. "Don't 8lame yourself for what other people chose to do. Have you talked to someone a8out this?"

 

    "I SEE A THERAPIST EVERY FEW WEEKS THROUGH THE UNIVERSITY HEALTH CENTER," Karkat waved his hands dismissively. "BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT. THE POINT IS, SHE STARTED SHOWING UP TO WORK WITH BRUISES. WHEN I CONFRONTED HER, SHE HAD ALL KINDS OF GREAT EXCUSES THAT NO IDIOT WOULD BELIEVE. I'M NOT SURE SHE WANTED ME TO BELIEVE HER. WHEN SHE CAME IN WITH A HANDPRINT ON HER THROAT, I CALLED HER ON IT." He coughed, then continued hoarsely. "SHE ADMITTED THAT THERE WAS A PROBLEM, PROMISED TO LEAVE HIM, BLAH BLAH, BUT IT TOOK A WHILE, YOU KNOW? SHE'D TRY, AND HE'D TAKE HER ON A DATE, OR BUY HER SOMETHING NICE. BUT ONE DAY SHE SHOWED UP AT WORK LOOK LOOKING ROUGH. REALLY ROUGH. BLOODY NOSE, A LIMP...YOU KNOW, SHE USED TO HAVE LONG HAIR? IT WAS ALL CHOPPED OFF. I TOLD HER TO GO HOME, GET SOME REST. I TOLD HER WE WOULDN'T NEED HER TONIGHT. SHE INSISTED ON STAYING, CRIED EVEN. SHE NEVER CRIES. SO SHE STAYED AND CHOPPED UP ONIONS." He smiled then. "SERIOUSLY, SHE INSISTED THAT 'NO ON3 1S GO1NG TO 4SK WH4T'S WRONG 1F 1'M CHOPP1NG ON1ONS.' LIKE SHE DIDN'T KNOW HOW FUCKED UP HER FACE WAS."

 

   Vriska laughed, a little bitterly. "I just 8et. She's not one to fret over 8lood. I nearly cut my finger off on the pizza cutter and she called me a 8itch 8a8y."

 

     "YOU ARE A BABY. AND A BITCH TOO. NOT THE POINT. THE POINT IS, SHE WAS MID- SHIFT WHEN GAMZEE SHOWED UP. HE WAS YELLING AND THROWING SHIT. GOING OFF ABOUT HOW SHE LEFT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND HOW DARE SHE DO THIS TO HIM. SHE JUST STOOD THERE WITH THAT HUGE KNIFE IN HER HAND. AND HE-" Karkat's voice broke. " I DON'T REALLY WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT HE DID. THAT'S ACTUALLY THE ABSOLUTE LAST THING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT. HE ATTACKED HER. I CALLED THE POLICE. BY THE TIME THEY CAME SHE HAD SOME BROKEN RIBS AND A FRACTURED EYE SOCKET. THEY TOOK HER OUT OF HERE ON A GODDAMN STRETCHER, VRISKA."

 

     Vriska made a choking noise in the back of her throat, something like a sob. She couldn't help it. Terezi was an imposing presence wherever she went, and Vriska didn't always remember that she was small. And she was so damn cheerful, it was easy to forget that she could be anything else. 

 

     Karkat took a deep breath before continuing. "SHE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL FOR WEEKS, THEN PHYSICAL THERAPY FOR A WHILE. WHENEVER I VISITED, SHE SEEMED LIKE SHE WASN'T QUITE THERE. IT WAS LIKE TALKING TO AN EMPTY SHELL. THE COURT STUFF TOOK FOREVER. HE WAS SENTENCED TO THREE MONTHS, THEN COMMUNITY SERVICE. SHE GOT A RESTRAINING ORDER TOO, WHICH WAS REASSURING. BUT WE WERE STILL SHORT TWO EMPLOYEES. I STARTED TAKING APPLICATIONS IN THE SHOP, BUT EVERYONE BESIDES YOU WAS AN ABSOLUTE SHIT-FOR-BRAINS FUCKWIT WITH NO EXPERIENCE AND NO AVAILABILITY. YOU STARTED ON TEREZI'S THIRD DAY BACK. I WAS HOPING HAVING SOMEONE BACK IN THE KITCHEN WITH HER WOULD MAKE THINGS EASIER ON HER WHILE SHE RECOVERED AND GOT USED TO BEING HERE. I DIDN'T PLAN ON KEEPING YOU ON, BUT SHE REALLY LIKES YOU. IT WAS LIKE AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WHERE GAMZEE NEVER HAPPENED TO HER. SO HERE WE STAND."

 

     "There's one thing I don't get though," Vriska mused. "What was he even doing here if Terezi has a restraining order? Why would he 8e asking a8out the schedule when they're not allowed to 8e around each other?" 

 

     Desperation and guilt shifted across Karkat's face. "WHEN HE GOT OUT, HE NEEDED TO HAVE A JOB TO GET PAROLE, SO I TOLD HIM HE COULD COME BACK PART TIME AS A DRIVER, AS LONG AS HE NEVER CAME IN WHEN HE WASN'T SCHEDULED AND HONORED THE RESTRAINING ORDER. YOU'VE GOT TO UNDERSTAND," he pleaded, looking at Vriska as if seeking absolution, "I COULDN'T JUST LET HIM FAIL. HE'S LIKE MY BROTHER!" 

 

     Vriska thought of her mother, blowing cigarette smoke in her face and winced. "I get it. I really do get it. 8ut I don't think you can risk giving him another chance, Karkat. Like I said, you can't save people. You can help people save themselves, 8ut you can't 8e Jegus or whatever, ok? It's not your job to sacrifice yourself for people who won't help themselves." Her phone vibrated, with a text from Terezi that just said "1'M ON TH3 H34LTH C3NT3R ST3PS. S33 YOU SOON?" Vriska typed out a hasty reply and said to Karkat, "Terezi needs picked up. Will you be alright here on your own?"

 

     "I'LL BE FINE. MY BROTHER'S ON HIS WAY, HE'LL LECTURE ME ON EVERY SINGLE REASON MY CHOICES WERE PROBLEMATIC FOR THE NEXT FEW HOURS I'M SURE, BUT IT'LL BE GOOD NOT TO BE HERE ALONE." He waved her on dismissively. "SHE NEEDS YOU A WHOLE LOT MORE THAN I DO."

 

     

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! That was intense. I've written this chapter about fifteen times, and I can honestly say I still don't like the way it turned out. I'm sure there'll be more edits to follow, but I promise I'll let you all know if I make changes. I'm not good at writing Karkat! These poor kids have been through an awful lot, haven't they? And we don't even know what Vriska's story is. 
> 
> If you or someone you love is a victim of abuse, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at https://www.thehotline.org


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright my friends, here's what went down in previous chapters under a trigger warning: we learn that Gamzee abused Terezi during a short-lived relationship. They worked together at Sgrub, and when Terezi broke up with him he assaulted her and was charged for it. He briefly encounters Vriska and Karkat while Terezi leaves out the back. Karkat explains the context of the encounter to Vriska. Vriska is now on her way to pick up Terezi from therapy.
> 
> IN THIS CHAPTER, VRISKA'S FAMILY TRAUMAS WILL BE BRIEFLY DISCUSSED. In case any readers are sensitive to this topic, I'll post a summary at the beginning of the following chapter, like I did at the start of this one. Be safe friends.

Vriska sat in the car, seatbelt burning into her collarbone. The sun glared through her dusty windshield, baking her skin and making her eyes water and blink until she finally gave in and pulled her sunglasses out of the glove compartment. She tapped her fingers and jittered her thigh to the obscenely loud Bikini Kill song cranking through her speakers. She'd shouted a few times, but there was no way any of the students passing by could distinguish her anguished yells from the angry female vocals on the radio. Terezi was taking forever to leave the campus health center, and it was making Vriska's brain crawl. Just as she was about to get out and hunt her down, the door opened and Terezi tumbled in.  
"HOLY SH1T VR1SK4, COULD YOUR MUS1C B3 4NY LOUD3R? TURN 1T DOWN!" she said, twirling the volume dial a few rounds before leaning back in her seat and letting out a deep sigh. She closed her eyes and was quiet for a few minutes as Vriska pulled away from the curb and headed home. Vriska glanced sideways at her a few times. "1 KNOW YOU'R3 ST4R1NG VR1SK4."  
"I'm not staring," Vriska snipped, then sighed and rubbed her face. "Sorry, jegus. I'm trying not to 8e 8itchy."  
"NO, 1T'S COOL." Terezi's voice softened, sounding concerned. "4R3 YOU OK?"  
"I should 8e asking you that," Vriska mumbled.  
"NO, YOU SHOULDN'T. 1 DON'T W4NT YOU TO. 1'M 4CTUALLY OK." Terezi's fists were clenched at her sides. "1'M JUST SO FUCK1NG 4NGRY, TH4T'S 4LL."  
"Well of course you are. He was horri8le to you. He needs to stay the fuck away or next time he'll 8e yanking my 8oot out of his ass."  
Terezi smiled wryly. "K4RK4T TOLD YOU. 1'M GL4D YOU'R3 NOT 1N TH3 D4RK."  
"Unlike some people, who are always in the dark."  
Terezi smacked Vriska's arm. "HUSH, YOU. 1'M NOT G3TT1NG P41D 3NOUGH TO PUT UP W1TH TH1S. 4ND 1'M NOT 4NGRY 4BOUT THAT." Vriska snorted derisively. "OK4Y, 1'M PR3TTY M4D 4BOUT TH4T, 1 BUST3D MY 4SS TO M4K3 TH4T 1D1OT R3SP3CT M3 4ND 4LL 1 GOT W4S MY 4SS K1CK3D 4ROUND. BUT TH4T'S NOT WH4T'S FUCK1NG M3 UP R1GHT NOW. NOT R34LLY. 1T'S NOT 4BOUT WH4T H3'S PUT M3 THROUGH. 1 GO TO PT 4ND 4 PSYCHOLOG1ST 4ND 1T FUCK1NG SUCKS BUT 4T L34ST 1 H4V3 TH4T SUPPORT SYST3M. BUT TO DR4G K4RK4T B4CK 1NTO 1T, 4FT3R 3V3RYTH1NG H3'S B33N THROUGH TRY1NG TO G3T G4MZ33'S L1F3 TOG3TH3R, TO JUST SHOW UP 4ND SP1T 1N H1S F4C3 L1K3 TH4T W4S JUST 4 N4STY TH1NG TO DO. 4ND TO 1NVOLV3 YOU-  
"Don't worry a8out me Terezi, seriously, that's not a 8ig deal-"  
"BUT 1T 1S 4 B1G D34L! YOU SHOULD H4V3 H34RD 4BOUT TH1S SH1T FROM M3, NOT FROM K4RK4T 1N TH3 M1DDL3 OF 4 M3NT4L BR34KDOWN WH3N 1'V3 D1S4PP34R3D OFF ST4G3 L3FT TO L3T YOU F1GHT THE FUCK1NG FORC3S OF 3V1L. YOU SHOULD N3V3R H4V3 B33N 1NVOLV3D 1N TH1S!" As soon as the car was in park, Terezi was out, slamming the car door with unnecessary force.

Objectively, this situation explained a lot to Vriska. The way Terezi had curled up under her arm during certain scenes in Jessica Jones. How she hadn't told Vriska where she was sleeping, or explained how she felt about their living situation. Karkat's careful hovering around Terezi, like she was a porcelain doll on the verge of shatter. She pondered these things as they climbed the steps in silence, Terezi's face like stone. "You're right," she conceded quietly. "It is a 8ig deal. 8ut not the way you think it is. I shouldn't 8e a part of this 8ecause he never should have hurt you. Not 8ecause of anything you did, or didn't do, or whatever."  
"1 KNOW TH4T," Terezi replied, just as quietly, fiddling with the front door lock and heading into the apartment to flop down on the couch. "1'M ST1LL M4D 4S H3LL THOUGH."  
"I'll 8et you are. He's a disgusting 8astard and if he steps to me again the cops'll have to peel his 8rains off the ceiling with a spatula." Vriska threw herself down on the couch beside Terezi and pulled her rum bottle out from under the coffee table.  
"WH4T BR41NS?" Terezi asked with a giggle. "H3'S 4 MORON!"  
"Yes, he is." Vriska offered Terezi the bottle, and surprisingly, she took a deep swing.  
"1 H4T3 RUM," she muttered.   
"There's plenty of other liquor if you want it." Vriska set the bottle down without drinking.  
"1'M NOT GO1NG TO DR1NK 4BOUT TH1S. 1'M GO1NG TO ORD3R D3L1V3RY, 1'M GOING TO S1T 4ROUND 1N MY UND3RW34R, 4ND 1'M GO1NG TO M4R4THON TH3 F1N4L S34SON OF BON3S. 4ND YOU!" Terezi grabbed Vriska's shirt sleeve. "YOU 4R3 GO1NG TO S1T H3R3 W1TH M3 4ND W3 4R3 GO1NG TO H4NG OUT."  
"Ok, ok, I'm not going anywhere. What do you want to eat?"

The two of them sat, bickering amiably about food and watching TV. Terezi's shoulders slowly loosened, and eventually Vriska felt like she could breathe again.  
"HOW 1S 1T," Terezi began, chowing down on a burnt caramel donut that had just been dropped off by a skittish delivery guy who had tried his best not to look at Vriska's bra when she answered the door in a bathrobe. "FUCK, TH1S TH1NG 1S M3SSY. 4NYW4Y, HOW 1S 1T TH4T W3 4LW4YS D3LV3 1NTO MY 1SSU3S BUT N3V3R 3V3N TOUCH ON YOURS. 1 F33L L1K3 1 KNOW NOTHING 4BOUT YOU, BUT YOU KNOW 3V3RYTH1NG 4BOUT M3."  
"I must just 8e 800 times 8etter than you at 8eing su8tle." Vriska shrugged, licking strawberry-lavender crumbs from her fingertips.  
"SUR3, VR1SK4, YOU'R3 D3F1N1T3LY SUBTL3." Terezi elbowed Vriska, who elbowed her back. "BUT S3R1OUSLY, WH4T'S YOUR D34L?"  
"Terezi, you know everything there is to know a8out me. What's my favorite color?"  
"BLU3, BUT-"  
"And what's my favorite pizza?"  
"1T'S 4LFR3DO W1TH MUSHROOMS, B4N4N4 P3PP3RS, 4NCHOV13S, 4ND-"  
"Exactly. What do I do after work?"  
"YOU W4TCH TH3 N3WS 4ND SCR34M, 4ND TH3N YOU W4TCH 3LL3N. VR1SK4, TH4T'S NOT WH4T 1 M34N!"  
"Then what do you mean?" Vriska asked.  
"1 DON'T KNOW 4NYTH1NG 4BOUT YOUR L1F3 B3FOR3 W3 M3T!"  
"There's not much to know." Terezi arched an eyebrow at Vriska and said nothing. "Ok, ok. Well. Um........I came to college 8ecause I wanted to 8e a history teacher, 8ut I changed my mind. My exes are all fairly normal and 8oring, 8ecause the only woman I've dated is Kanaya and you know all a8out that."  
"NO 1 DON'T!" Terezi grabbed Vriska and squeezed her. "1S SH3 YOUR ON3 TH4T GOT 4W4Y?"  
"Ew, Terezi, that's gross. I mean, I thought she might 8e. 8ut we argued a lot. She's too much mom, not enough girlfriend. I haven't really dated anyone else 8esides John, and that was just silly."  
"WH4T 4BOUT YOUR F4M1LY?" Terezi asked.   
"Do we have to do this?"  
"1'LL SHOW YOU M1N3 1F YOU SHOW M3 YOURS."  
"Fair enough. My mother is independently wealthy, if you ask her. If you ask me, or the police, she's involved in some kind of du8ious 8usiness that can't 8e proven. She's also a manipulative 8itch and she used to 8eat the shit out of me as a kid. And if you don't mind, the less we say a8out her the 8etter. I've got two 8ig sisters, Aranea and Spinneret. Aranea is in the middle of a doctorate program for some history 8ullshit, and Spinneret is in the Navy. Aranea is useless, 8ut Spinneret always sends nice gifts for holidays. I don't visit anymore."  
"OH, WOW, 1'M SORRY..." Terezi looked entirely at a loss. "M4YB3 1 SHOULDN'T H4V3 1NT3RROG4T3D YOU."  
"No, it's cool. I understand why you're interested. I just haven't told you much, 8ut that's just 8ecause there's not a lot worth knowing. I'm leaving that all 8ehind and 8uilding a future. I try not to let the past 8other me." She raised her donut in a mock salute. "To the future! And all that other sappy 8ullshit."  
"TO TH3 FUTUR3!" Terezi agreed enthusiastically, knocking her donut against Vriska's. "1F YOU DON'T M1ND, L3T'S STOP T4LK1NG 4BOUT 1T THOUGH. TH1NK1NG 4BOUT TH3 FUTUR3 M4K3S M3 QU34SY."  
Vriska shrugged. "Works for me. You know some of my trauma, I know some of yours. Let's watch some 8ones." She leaned back, hands behind her head. Terezi laid down sideways, head in Vriska's lap. Eventually, Vriska's arms came down and she ran her fingers through Terezi's messy hair, teasing it from the roots outward until they both fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that happened. How do y'all feel?


	24. Chapter 24

  Vriska woke earlier than usual, the sun just barely cracking honey-gold on the window sill and spilling sticky and bright across the worn wood boards. Dust motes floated through the sunbeams. It would have been idyllic if it wasn't so fucking early. Terezi was snoring, louder than usual. Vriska pushed her off her lap and stood, sighing. Too early, maybe, but there was a crick in her neck and she didn't smell right. There was no way of going back to sleep now anyway, not with Terezi's snores or the bright morning sun. She headed for the bathroom, hoping to get some hot water before the neighbors used it all up. 

  Soon the bathroom was full of steam, and Vriska was attempting to get that snarled mat of hair at the back of her neck detangled with a fistful of Lusti Naturals Triple Strength hair moisturizer she'd picked up at the Dollar Tree the other day. It just wasn't happening. She'd put Spotify on her phone, hoping to shake herself out of the usual morning daze, but it had decided to play the Cars and she may or may not have been yelling along to Moving in Stereo. She did her best on the tangle, but it just wasn't happening, so she stood under the hot water and zoned, consciously NOT thinking about yesterday. Midway through Let's Go, Terezi banged on the bathroom door. 

 "VR1SK1! DO YOU TH1NK YOU COULD S1NG 4 B1T LOUD3R? 1'M NOT SUR3 1F TH3 N31GHBORS KNOW YOU 'L1K3 TH3 N1GHT L1F3 B4BY!" she deadpanned, opening the door to come in and brush her teeth.

 "Terezi! I'm in the shower, what the fuck?" Vriska yelped, tugging the curtain just a little more shut than before.

 "OH, WOW, NOW 1 C4N TOT4LLY S33 YOU. YOUR N4K3D BODY CUR3D MY BL1NDN3SS, 1T'S 4 FUCK1NG M1R4CL3. Y33T." Terezi turned to face the shower curtain, and Vriska yelped.

 "Can you fucking not though?" Vriska asked, voice higher pitched than usual. 

 Terezi rolls her eyes. "WH4T3V3R. 1'M BRUSH1NG MY T33TH. W4SH YOUR FUCK1NG H41R, 1 SW34R 1T'S B33N 4 W33K." She turned away to face the sink.

 Vriska waited for her to leave before she turned the now-cold water off and climb out of the shower. Wiping the fogged mirror hastily, she brushed her own teeth with Terezi's still wet toothbrush. If she was being honest, she hadn't seen hers in a few days, and what were a few germs between friends, really? 

 "1 GOT 4 C4LL FROM ROS3. 1 DON'T TH1NK YOU'R3 GONN4 L1K3 1T, VR1SK4," Terezi said gravely. She had her feet propped on the kitchen table and was eating two Lucky Charms cereal bars stacked on top of one another, with what looked like ketchup between them. Vriska winced, but managed to keep from asking for clarification.

"What does Rosie want?" she asked, tearing open a fresh pack of Holy Crap cereal and dumping it into a dubiously clean bowl.

 "SH3 S4YS W3 DON'T G3T OUT 3NOUGH. SH3 1NS1ST3D TH4T W3 4LL GO OUT TO 4 B4R SH3 L1K3S TON1GHT."

 Vriska shrugged. "Ok, 8ut I'm not sure what the pro8lem is. I like 8ars." She hiked herself up onto the counter to eat her cereal. 

 "SH3 S4YS 1T'S K4R4OK3 N1GHT."

 "Soooooooo, you told her I'm going to 8e sick tonight, right?" she asked, fighting down panic.

 "UNFORTUN4T3LY, SH3 COULD H34R YOU Y3LL1NG 1N TH3 B4CKGROUND. YOU L1K3 TH3 N1GHT L1F3, R1GHT B4BY?" Terezi batted her eyes innocently.

 "Fuck," Vriska mumbled, cheeks flushing at Terezi's teasing use of "baby" and the thought of Rose hearing her shower-screams.

 "4PP4R3NTLY IT'S SOM3 K1ND OF B3N3F1T FOR S3XU4L 4SS4ULT V1CT1MS. SH3 M4D3 M3 F33L GU1ILTY, VR1SK4. SH3 S41D TH3Y'D P1CK US UP 4ROUND 8."

 "Gr8. Perf8ct." Vriska pinched the bridge of her nose. "I h8 listening to drunk people war8le along to 8ad pop songs."

 "1'M SUR3 OUR N31GHBORS F33L TH3 S4M3 W4Y WH3N YOU S1NG 1N TH3 SHOW3R 4T S1X 4M." 

 "Our neigh8ors aren't classically trained in music," Vriska muttered sourly.

 "1'M SORRY, 1 DON'T TH1NK 1 H34RD YOU R1GHT." Terezi pantomimed cleaning out her ears for effect. "1 THOUGHT YOU S41D YOU W3R3 CL4SS1C4LLY TR41N3D 1N MUS1C, BUT TH4T C4N'T B3 R1GHT B3C4US3 1 F33L L1K3 1 WOULD H4V3 4LR34DY KNOWN TH4T."

 "I'm the youngest child of Jill the Ripper, the high-class hoe of the rich and mediocre. Of course I'm classically trained in piano and voice. I sing mezzo soprano. I also took some contemporary dance classes. If you Google my name you get my high school and community theater achievements. You really haven't Googled me? I Googled you!"

 "DON'T TURN TH1S 4ROUND ON M3, 1'M NOT THE ON3 WHO- W4IT." Terezi stopped. "YOU GOOGL3D M3?"

 "Terezi, I let you live in my house. Of course I fucking Googled you." She smirked. "You're 8oring. Academic achievements, graduation ranking, student of the month article, gaming club president........8oring."

 "RUD3. I N3V3R GOOGL3D YOU B3C4US3 1'M NOT 4 P4R4NO1D NUT. BUT 1F YOU'R3 GONN4 M4K3 4 B1G D34L 4BOUT 1T..." she pulled up her phone. "S1R1, LOOK UP 'VR1SK4 S3RK3T." 

 "Here's what I found for: Vriska Serket. 'Vriska Serket Stars As Wednesday Adams in The Adams Family Musical,' 'Vriska Serket Distinguished Honor Roll,' 'Vriska Serket Performs Californication for Charity,' 'Two Local Girls Injured in Serious Car Accident-"

 Vriska snatched the phone. "I don't think so! We've 8een living together long enough that I don't think that's necessary." 

 "4WWW.' Terezi pouted at her. "BUT 1 W4NT3D TO L1ST3N TO C4L1FORN1C4TION!"

 "You can californicate with me any day," Vriska said. "Wink."

 "YOU JUST...S41D...W1NK...4T M3."

 "Well yeah. Would you have noticed if I hadn't told you?" 

 "1 GU3SS NOT. W31RD." She crinkled her nose. "M4YB3 YOU COULD DO TH4T SONG 4T K4R4OK3."

 "No way. I'm not a8out to em8arass myself 8y drunk serenading an entire 8ar full of strangers. That's your deal, 8uddy, not mine. I'll 8e nice and cozy on a 8arstool, judging."

"WH4T 3LS3 1S N3W?" Terezi teased. "VR1SK4 S3RK3T, JUDG1NG P3OPL3 4ND B31NG 4 NONP4RT1C1P4NT. 4 SHOCK."

"What's that supposed to mean????????" Vriska asked, feigning shock. "I'm not at all, even a little 8it, judgemental."

"Y34H TOT4LLY. SUR3." Terezi stood up and threw away her trash. "1'M SO NOT GONN4 TOUCH TH4T. 1'M GONN4 GO PL4Y B3FOR3 TH3 STORM. W4NT TO H3LP M3 P1CK R34LLY T3RR1BL3 CHO1C3S?"

"Sounds like fun, I'm literally the 8est at making 8ad decisions."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick update before things heat up a bit! Let me know in the comments what songs you're expecting in the next chapter!


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 25th chapter everyone! I'm so grateful to all of you for the support you've shown me in the last few years. I know this fic has taken forever and a day, and I'm so happy you've stuck with me to see it happen. 
> 
> Some of you may have already seen this on Tumblr, but this story is -gasp- almost over! I'll be wrapping up Making Dough within the next few chapters. So wonderful things are in store. BUT (of course there's bad news) these last few chapters may take a bit longer than we'd like. I want this story to end with all loose ends tied up and everything in place, so that means a lot more effort for me. I take forever to update as it is, and I'm so sorry for that. But we're almost there everyone! I love you all so much! <3

"VR1SK4, HOW M4NY FL4NN3L SH1RTS DO YOU OWN?" Terezi was standing in the bathroom door, leaning casually on the frame wearing her absolute holiest jeans and a bralette. 

"What kind of question is that, I'm fucking gay!" Vriska dug through her make up case frantically, searching for her eyeliner pencil.

"Y34H, BUT 1'M PR3TTY SUR3 YOU'V3 D3PL3T3D TH3 34RTH'S SUPPLY OF PL41D, YOU N33D TO CH1LL TH3 FUCK OUT 4ND SH4R3." Terezi leaned in next to her, jabbing her in the ribs with an elbow and snatching the eyeliner, which was right in front of her face, OF COURSE. 

"Are you asking to 8orrow one of my flannels?" she asked, frustrated.

"M4YB3."

"There's a teal and 8lack one hanging on the bedpost, wear that. 8ut don't spill shit on it, you got ketchup on my leggings last weekend and I can't get it out." Terezi left the room. "And GIVE ME 8ACK MY EYELINER!" Terezi didn't answer, but the eyeliner pencil flew through the door and hit her in the shoulder.

"TH4T'S 4N 1MPROV3M3NT. THOS3 L3GG1NGS 4R3 H1D3OUS."

"Fuck you, 8uddy. You can't fucking see." Vriska muttered as she leaned as close as she could to the mirror and fixed that stupid eyeliner.

"1 H34RD TH4T!" Terezi yelled from the next room.

"Of course you did." 

\------------

When Kanaya pulled up downstairs, she didn't even bother to buzz. Vriska heard a honk from the street, and Terezi was dragging her out the door before she even had a chance to protest. The car was in the fire lane, hazards on and angled toward the road. 

"Can't even 8uzz in?" Vriska asked, strapping into the back seat. 

"No, I Clearly Cannot. Because Someone," she shot dagger eyes at Rose, "Could Not Wait To Get To The Bar."

"Darling, I just can't wait to hear our lovely Vriska charm our ears off with her dulcet tones." Rose tilted her seat back, right into Vriska's lap.

"Good luck with that 8ud. I'm not singing tonight."

"SUUUUUUUUR3 YOU'R3 NOT, VR1S," Terezi sing-songed, leaning in to smush Vriska from the side."

"You two keep taking up my personal space, and we'll 8e wiping my vomit off the windows." She gulped. "I fucking hate sitting in the 8ack seat."

Terezi moved away from her immediately. "UND3RSTOOD. P3RSON4L SP4C3 W1LL B3 R3SP3CT3D UNT1L W3'R3 OUT OF TH3 C4R."

"And after that?"

Terezi wiggled her eyebrows.

"Oh, get a fucking room," Rose groaned.

Terezi's brows waggled even harder.

"8luh," Vriska stuck her tongue out.

"B3TT3R K33P TH4T TH1NG TO YOURS3LF OR 1T M1GHT G3T B1TT3N OFF."

"Let's pretend for 8 seconds that you wouldn't enjoy that."

"NO MOR3 TH4N YOU!"

"I Hate To Interrupt Your Disgusting Love-Fest, But Get Out Of My Car. We're Here." Kanaya threw the car in park and climbed out.

"Hey," Vriska said, catching up to her and grabbing her shoulder. "If I didn't know any 8etter, I'd say you're not excited to 8e here."

"Not Particularly. I'm Sorry, I Know Rose And Terezi Are Really Looking Forward To This Evening, But I Haven't Performed Since High School."

"8ro, it's not a performance. It's karaoke. Most of the people in this 8ar are gonna 8e drunk, tone-deaf wanna8es. Don't stress."

"It Isn't The Bar Patrons," she said with a sigh. "It's Rose."

"Of course it is." Vriska looked back at Rose, who was walking arm in arm with Terezi a few strides behind them. "Listen, Rose is gonna love you no matter what. Not to mention, I happen to know you have a 8eautiful voice."

"Vriska, That's Kind Of You To Say, But-"

"Shut up," Vriska advised. "Can we just try to get a seat that isn't 8eside the mic stand? I want to 8e as far from these heathens as humanly possi8le."

They settled into a booth near the back of the smoking section. Terezi makes a big show of holding her nose for the first few minutes, but as soon as they were all poring over the binder of songs she shut up about it. Vriska observed from a distance. She knew which song she'd sing if they managed to bully her into it, or get her drunk enough to care.

Rose hustled off to sign them up for songs. "You're singing I Kissed A Girl," she teased as she sat back down.

"I sure as shit am not. That 8itch is an alto, why the hell is she singing soprano?"

"You're an elitist fuck, you know that?" Rose asked. 

"A8sofuckinlutely." Vriska took a swig of the beer Rose had set beside her. "And this tastes like 8utt, just so you know."

Rose winked. "You would know."

The MC cleared his throat. "Next up is um...Terezi? With Blinded by the Light. Norah B. and Rose are on deck."

"Ok, that's just 8ad, Rez. You're not funny," Vriska snorted.

Terezi winked at her and sauntered up to the mic, standing at an awkward angle and not quite facing the screen or the bar patrons. 

"She Has A Lovely Voice," Kanaya said, voice soft in Vriska's ear.

"Um........yeah. Sure. May8e I'd like it 8etter if I didn't wake up to her shower squawking so often."

"Vriska, I Am Not Terezi. I Can See You Blushing. You're Better Off Lying To Someone Who Doesn't Know You So Well."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Vriska blustered.

"Guys...is she saying 'revved up like a douche?" Rose asked.

"Of course she is, those are the words!" 

"Those Are...Most Definitely Not The Words." Kanaya had her head in her hands when Terezi sat back down.

"HOW'D 1 SOUND?" she asked brightly.

"Lovely," Rose answered, a barely concealed laugh in her voice. "Definitely the best version I've heard."

"1 KNOW WH3N 1'M B31NG M4D3 FUN OF," Terezi pouted.

"You sounded fiiiiiiiine," Vriska said. "Have a 8eer, relax."

"1 H4T3 B33R. YOU GUYS SUCK."

"Whatever plebeians. I'm on next." Rose got up and walked toward the platform.

"1'M GONN4 DR1NK H3R M4RT1N1." Terezi grabbed the drink from across the table, easily ignoring the death glares from Rose, who had just taken the microphone from the girl ahead of her.

"Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night, and wouldn't you love to love her?" she began.

"Oh, you ridiculous les8ian stereotype, Rosie!" Vriska laughed.

Kanaya had her chin in her hands, and was staring in a somewhat dreamy state. "She Really Is Wonderful."

"1 COULDN'T H3LP BUT NOT1C3 TH4T YOU H4V3N'T P1CK3D 4 SONG Y3T," Terezi teased.

"Neither Has Vriska."

"Aaaaaaaand I won't 8e picking one, either. 8ut Kanaya, you're not the antisocial jackass type. You don't want to 8e like me, do you?"

"I Assure You, I Cannot Be Like You No Matter How Hard I Try." Kanaya rolled her eyes and hummed along to Rose's voice.

"Ouch," Vriska muttered. Terezi pushed her ice cold beer to Vriska's face.

"FOR TH3 BURN," she explained.

"Fuck off, 8uddy."

Rose sat back down beside Kanaya and tossed her hair. "Would you stay if she promised you heaven?" she teased, kissing Kanaya's cheek. 

"I Um. Well." Kanaya replied, visibly flustered.

"Oooooh, you would!" Rose snagged her somewhat depleted martini from Terezi's fingers.

A young guy in a polo and slacks took the mic next. "Ready for some 8illy Joel?" Vriska asked.

"LET THE BODIES HIT THE- FLOOOOOOR!"

"Um........I take that 8ack."

They sat for a while, coming up with a complex rating system for the singers. Vriska's ratings were heavily slanted based on whether or not a singer "Picked a song within their fucking range, for the love of god." Terezi rated everyone's song choice separately from their voice. And Rose's savagery knew no bounds, rating everyone incredibly low and giving a detailed analysis as to why. At one point Kanaya disappeared for a few minutes, citing her need to go to the bathroom, but Vriska saw her muttering something to the MC on her way back.

"I saw that, 8y the way," she said in an undertone when Kanaya returned.

"Vriska, I'm Going To Have To Insist That You Sign Up For At Least One Song. You Are Here To Have A Good Time With Us, Not To Make Me Feel As Though My Every Move Is Being Judged."

"Yeah, yeah, fussy8utt, I can sing one song. If you 8uy me another drink."

"Deal." They shook on it. "I Already Put Your Song In."

"Seriously?"

"It's Not Like You Don't Do The Same Song Every Time!"

"That's fair, I guess. 8ut these two don't know that." She motioned to Rose and Terezi.

"I Will Not Tell If You Don't."

"You'd fucking 8etter not. That's a 8est friend secret."

Rose leaned over, head on Kanaya's shoulder. "What's a seeecret?" she asked.

"Nothing important," Vriska said. "You think you've had enough to drink?"

"Noooo!" Rose giggled a bit uncharacteristically. "I'm so good!"

"Of Course You Are Baby," Kanaya reassured her placatingly.

"Kanaya is up next!" The MC announced, holding out the mic.

"Woo, baby, that's you!" Rose gave Kanaya what was meant to be a playful shove, but nearly sent her sprawling.

"Wish me luck!" Her hands were shaking as she took the microphone.

"Um. Hi..." The mic squealed and they all cringed.

"8reak a leg, 8oo!" Vriska called out from across the bar.

"Make up your mind," she crooned. "Decide to walk with me, around the lake tonight...around the lake tonight."

"No fucking way!" Vriska murmured, in awe.

"WOW. NOT WH4T 1 W4S 3XP3CTING. 4T 4LL." Terezi whistled long and low. Rose was completely enthralled.

"Nice heart eyes, Rosie!" Vriska punched Rose's arm.

Rose ignored her entirely. "This is...uncomfortably hot," she said softly.

Terezi snorted. "OF COURS3 YOU'D B3 1NTO TH3 V4MP1R3 TH1NG."

"I think that's supposed to be an insult, but it probably just means I have more fun than you!" She gave a salacious wink, and Vriska mock-gagged.

They clapped raucously as Kanaya finished. Rose shouted something nearly incomprehensible but undoubtedly raunchy. 

"You Are Disgusting, Love," Kanaya said affectionately and sat back down with them. "How Bad Was It?"

"FUCK1NG 4WFUL. 1 THOUGHT ROS3 WOULD N33D TO CH4NG3 H3R P4NT13S. YOU TWO R3VOLT M3."

"She's just jealous!" Rose made a kissy face at Kanaya, whose face was tomato-red. "Vriska, you're up next, put your drink down and go serenade us with your beautiful bullshit."

"What kind of moron do you think I am?" Vriska asked incredulously, standing up. "I'm 8ringing my drink with me." Shedowned her rum and coke in one go, slamming the mug down on the table.

"DR4M4 QU33N," Terezi muttered, and Kanaya nodded. Vriska ignored them, grabbing the microphone with both hands and tapping her foot to keep count and be ready to come in. She licked her lips, prepared to sing. Terezi hooted at her.

" _I don't care if you hurt me some more,_  
_I don't care if you even the score,_  
_You can knock me and I don't care,_  
_Well, you can mock me and I don't care_  
_You can rock me just about anywhere,_ " She winked here, emphasizing "rock me" a little more than necessary.  
  


" _Cause you're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_I need you tonight_  
_I need you tonight!_

_I don't care if you use me again_  
_I don't care if you abuse me again_  
_You can make me I don't care_  
_And you can fake me I don't care -"_

She threw a little pelvic thrust in there, for show. Rose hooted, and Terezi howled with laughter.

" _And you can love me just about anywhere_  
_It's alright -_ "

Vriska pulled the mic off the stand and leaned on the table where her friends sat. She took Kanaya's wine from her hand and took a long swig, emptying the glass in one go.

" _Cause you're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_I need you tonight_  
_I said, I need you tonight!_

 _I don't want to feel sorry for you_  
_You don't have to make believe it's you_  
_You can pump me I don't care_  
_You can bump me I don't care -"_ Vriska hip-bumped Terezi.

_"You can love me just about anywhere_  
_It's alright -_

_'Cause you're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_I need you tonight_  
_I said, I need you tonight!_

_You're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_You're all I've got tonight_  
_I need you tonight_  
_I need you tonight_  
_I need you tonight._ "

Vriska bowed, deep and theatrical, sweeping her beanie from her head. Rose whistled loudly between her teeth, and Kanaya shouted something that sounded like, "That Is My Vriska!" 

Terezi didn't say a word until Vriska was sitting back down beside her.

"That was really fucking gay," she whispered in a conspiratorial tone.

"I know," Vriska whispered back

The bar closed down not long after that, and Kanaya took a rather hammered Rose by the arm to call it a night. Rose complained loudly the whole way out the door, begging Terezi to "Take me daaaaancing! I want to go daaaaancing!!!!"

"There, There Love, Next Time. We Need Some Rest. Vriska And Terezi Are Going To Get An Uber And Go Home, Aren't You?" Kanaya shot them a venomous look.

"Of course we are! Terezi is getting us an U8er right now!" Vriska nodded seriously. 

"Oh, ok. Bye-bye for now!" Rose did a silly little finger wave and followed Kanaya out of the building.

"VR1SK4, 4R3 W3 R34LLY GO1NG HOM3 4LR34DY?"

Vriska shrugged. "Eventually. 8ut Rose had a good idea. Next 8ar?"

\-------------------------------------------------------

Terezi insisted she knew a fun place a few blocks down, and she dragged Vriska the whole way there. The bouncer at the door, a tall blonde man with a prominent neck tattoo, fist-bumped Terezi on the way in.

"Who's the bimbo?" he asked, nodding at Vriska.

"The 8im8o's name is Terezi. 8ut I think you two have already met. My name's Vriska."

"She's saucy, I like her." He motioned for them to go in, and Vriska fought back the wave of annoyance that threatened to smother her. The club was darker than Vriska expected. This obviously didn’t faze Terezi, who grabbed Vriska’s mildly sweaty hand and dragged her straight to the dance floor.

“8ut I want a drink first!” she protested, tugging back a bit.

Terezi made a face at her and leaned forward. “WH4T?” she asked loudly, brow wrinkled.

“8ooze!” Vriska shouted, forehead against the side of Terezi’s head.

A bony hip slammed into Vriska’s upper thigh, bumping her backward. “H3LL NO!” Terezi shouted, a hand on Vriska’s shoulder and mouth uncomfortably close to her ear. She was on her toes slightly, red Keds turned inward naturally. Vriska couldn’t help noticing weird, stupid details about weird, stupid Terezi who was waaaaaaaay too close and whose hot breath made her cheeks flush. She tugged away again, being sure not to let Terezi actually let go of her. No need to lose a blind girl in a crowd.

“8itch, if I’m gonna 8e dancing, I’d 8etter 8e drinking. Don’t worry a8out prices, I’m 8uying tonight.” Momma had sent her a ridiculous amount of cash, and she knew to spend fast and anonymous, just in case. Another thing Terezi didn’t need to know. Lawyer girl hated that Vriska didn’t wear a seatbelt, she didn’t need to know anything about the 8lack Widow Vriska called a mother.

“Oooh!” Terezi squealed. “I D1DN’T R34L1Z3 YOU W3R3 W34LTHY TH1S 3V3N1NG, M1SS S3RK3T! L34D TH3 W4Y.” Her hand grasped Vriska’s yet again, and she grinned expectantly as Vriska half-ran to the bar.

“I’d like an After 8 and a red dragon,” Vriska told the bartender, sliding a 100 dollar bill across the bar. “For a start.” The bartender looked startled for a moment, but his face smoothed over quickly and he got to work mixing drinks. Terezi’s came out first, to Vriska’s chagrin, but hers quickly followed. “8ottoms up,” Vriska smirked, clinking glasses with Terezi’s and downing her drink nearly all in one go. It was impressive, if a bit disgusting, to see Terezi do nearly the same, a bit of sticky red beverage clinging to her lips. She licked them and bared her teeth at Vriska, more predator than grin.

“M4YB3 YOU SHOULD L3T M3 P1CK TH3 N3XT ROUND, SP1DERB1TCH,” she said, setting her glass down on the bar and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. “B3C4US3 M1N3 W4S T4STY BUT YOURS SM3LL3D SUBP4R.”

“Su8par?!” Vriska asked in mock outrage, as smirk playing on her lips. Her cheeks were warm already, and she knew she was having a little too much fun. “Most definitely not. 8ut in the spirit of a good night and a long 8ar ta8, I’ll 8ite. What should I 8uy us?”

“1 TH1NK YOU C4N W41T UNT1L 1 ORD3R, 1MPAT13NT BR4T. BUT B1T1NG 1S 4LW4YS GOOD. TH4T’S 4N OPT1ON WH1L3 YOU W41T.” Terezi didn’t even bother facing toward her, she simply leaned across the bar until the bartender noticed her. “1’D L1K3 A CR4ZY B1TCH FOR TH1S CR4ZY B1TCH...4ND 1 GU3SS ON3 FOR MYS3LF 4S W3LL. 1’V3 B33N WOND3RING WH4T TH3Y T4ST3 L1K3,” she told him, and then had the audacity to turn and wink in Vriska’s direction...more or less. The bartender laughed outright. Vriska watched as he mixed Captain, Malibu Coconut, pineapple juice, and grenadine. He poured both over ice and dropped a cherry in each glass before sliding them across the bar. Vriska sipped and though she found the drink cloyingly sweet, almost syrupy, the bite of the rum still stung just enough. “1 KNOW WH4T YOU L1K3, S3RK3T. JUST 4DM1T 1T, TH4T’S PR3TTY D4MN T4STY.”

Vriska didn’t admit anything, but she couldn’t deny that the drink wasn’t horrible. "Not 8ad, nerd. Not the 8est drink I've ever had, 8ut you can't go wrong with rum."

 

"DR1NK UP, M3 H34RT13S, YO HO!" Terezi kicked at Vriska's shins, making contact but not causing any major damage, and Vriska did her best to trap those stupid little Keds between her boots as she drank. Terezi snorted. "fOOTS13S? 4R3 YOU TW3LV3?"  
"You kicked me!" Vriska replied indignantly, and Terezi swung her legs harder and laughed.

The bartender walked by just then, and Vriska casually touched his arm and mouthed something as Terezi continued talking animatedly, hands waving. Vriska couldn’t help admiring how the colorful lights of the club shocked across Terezi’s almost-too-pale face and flushed, rosy cheeks. She was like a canvas, and a drunken, sloppy artist was trying oh so hard to paint the ever-moving sunset across her skin. It was fascinating.

“Red headed slut?” the bartender asked, setting down two shots. Terezi looked scandalized for a moment, with eyes wide and jaw ajar, but then her hand found the shot glass and she grinned again. 

“R3D H34D3D SLUT, HUH?” she asked, tossing back the shot and smacking her lips loudly.

“Crazy 8itch, huh?” Vriska replied, taking her own shot and sucking air between her teeth. This one was waaaaaaaay too sweet, and she’d known that going in. Like candy with a kick, clinging to her tonsils. But it was worth it to see Terezi’s face in the hazy moment before she figured out the name of the shot. Also for the bright grin on her face when she drank it down.

“TH4T W4S PR3TTY FUCK1NG GOOD, S3RK3T. T4ST3Y 3VEN. R3M1NDS M3 OF HOW OFF1C3R C1NN4MON WH1FF SM3LLS, BUT SW33T3R AND T4NG13R 4ND W1TH 4 H1NT OF-”

“How a8out no,” Vriska said flatly, sipping the second drink she’d ordered for them. “Just drink your 8ooze and stop going of on weirdy weird tangents for 8 seconds.” She pushed the second glass toward Terezi, who took the hint and drank.

“TH1S 1S JUST 4LCOHOL 4ND TON1C W4T3R, VR1SKA,” Terezi said, sounding disappointed. “NO B4D PUNS OR H1LAR1OUS 4NT1CS L3FT? 1’M SUR3 TH3R3’S 4T L34ST ON3 GOOD BL1ND JOK3 YOU COULD H4V3 M4D3.”

“I diiiiiiiid think a8out getting you a 8lind Russian, 8ut I figured another sweet, creamy drink would just 8e filling and waste precious space for 8ooze,” Vriska said, her smirk stretching across her face. It occurred to her then that her cheeks were quite numb and her speech just sliiiiiiiightly slower than usual. “So I settled for whiskey gingers. Like you’re gonna 8e when you’re done drinking that.”

“1 4M D1SGUST3D W1TH TH1S P4TH3T1C B4D JOK3 VR1SK4. DISGUST3D.” But she drank. And a few rounds of shots later, most of which ended up being Red Headed Sluts, she was again begging to go out on the dance floor. “W3 D1DN’T COM3 H3R3 TO G3T DRUNK. OR 4T L34ST, 1 D1DN’T,” she slurred slightly. “WHY WON’T YOU D4NC3 W1TH M3, SP1D3RG1RL? YOU TOO 4FR41D? OR M4YB3 YOU’R3 JUST 4 B4D D4NC3R.”

“Me? A 8ad dancer? Pft! Fat chance!” Vriska laughed. “I’m like the 8est dancer there is. I’m the 8est at everything, Terezi. Don’t forget that!”

“SUR3 VR1SK4, 1 B3L13V3 YOU,” Terezi agreed easily.

“You do?” Vriska was suspicious.

“OF COURS3. TH4T’S WHY 1 W4NT YOU TO D4NC3 W1TH M3.” Terezi grabbed Vriska’s hand again, and yanked her right off her barstool, nearly knocking her to the floor. “L3T’S GO, M1SS B3ST D4NC3R 3V3R.” Tugging Vriska’s wrist, she pulled her upright and the two were immediately chest to chest. “D4NC3 W1TH M3,” she breathed into her ear before being consumed by giggles. She smelled like sugar, sweat, and an amalgamation of liquors. It was pleasant now, but Vriska could already envision the epic hangover in store. She could also envision the utter trauma of dancing here, now, not on the dancefloor but next to the bar where one of them was bound to knock into a less intoxicated patron and cause some sort of brawl. 

"Ok. 8ut we dance on the dancefloor, not 8y the 8ar. Don't 8e weird."  
  


Terezi didn't dignify this with a response, but as they walked toward the dance floor she licked Vriska's shoulder, almost defiantly. Standing suddenly much closer to each other, and fifty or so sweaty strangers in varying states of drunkenness, Vriska felt a prickle on her back that was definitely not nervousness. Not at all. She was the best dancer, and anyway, would Terezi really know the difference? Vriska swallowed hard. Of course she would. 

Terezi's body was already moving with the beat of the club mix, something with heavy bass that used to be a pop song. Vriska didn't know it. Terezi seemed to. She was mouthing the words, hips swaying and shoulders rolling. Vriska tried to follow her. She had rhythm, and rolling her hips in time with the synth-heavy pop tune was easier than usual, lubricated by liquor and maybe just a little attraction to the pretty girl dancing next to her.

Without warning, Terezi slung an arm around Vriska's neck, pulling their bodies closer together. Vriska gasped. Terezi's arm was sweaty, almost sticky against her neck. It would have probably been a little more attractive if it wasn't so gross, really. Still, her heart raced. Terezi's hipbones grazed the tops of Vriska's thighs, and she wondered for probably the millionth time how someone so loud could be so short. In lieu of a better plan, she wrapped her arms around Terezi's waist, hands settling on her lower back, which was also kind of sticky. Vriska tried very hard to remember how gross it was. Her heart was in her throat, pounding with the bass.

The track changed, pace speeding up. Or was that just Vriska's anxiety moving everything just a little faster. Their hips moved together, Vriska helplessly following Terezi, who was clearly a much better dancer no matter how much liquor either of them drank. Terezi's other arm was around her hips now, and her hand had settled comfortably in Vriska's back pocket, pulling her closer. "YOU'R3 NOT TH3 WORST D4NC34 3V34, VR1SK4. WH4T W4S 4LL TH4T WH1N1NG 4BOUT?"

Vriska laughed nonchalantly. "Just 8eing a good friend. Didn't want my 8rilliant dancing skills to intimid8 you. You know I'm the 8est at everything."

"1 WOULDN'T S4Y BR1LL14NT, BUT 1'M D1S4PO1NTED 4T HOW MUCH YOU DON'T SUCK."

Terezi tilted her chin up, and Vriska could see the brilliant colored lights reflect in her eyes as she suddenly leaned toward her.

'Is she a8out to kiss me?' Vriska wondered, leaning forward, dry-mouthed and anxious .

Terezi leaned in too, eyes half lidded and cheeks rosy.

Vriska could feel her heart pounding. Her own eyes closed, and-

 .

 .

 .

And Terezi puked on the floor between them.

"1 TH1NK 1'M R34DY TO GO HOM3."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if you follow my Tumblr (gayvriskaserket.tumblr.com) you may have already known that You're All I've Got Tonight was going to be the jam for this chapter. I'm not usually big on songfics but I can't help but be inspired by music. Also, my roommate REALLY wanted Kanaya to sing "Lip Gloss" but I just plain couldn't make it happen. I'm sorry guys. I'm not a good enough writer.
> 
> Some of you might recognize the club scene, because I posted it WAY in advance for Vrisrezi week as a stand-alone piece. It was finished and I was nowhere near being ready to put it in the story, but here we are!


	26. Chapter 26

After Terezi’s impressive imitation of a vomit fountain, Karaoke Night came to a screeching halt. Vriska heaved Terezi into the back of the Uber, making sure she spit in the street and not on the leather interior. They sat in the back of the car, Terezi leaned on Vriska’s chest and making silly faces up at her.

          “If you 8low chunks on me, you'd 8etter 8elieve I'm going to kick your ass.” Vriska put a protective arm around her as they swung around a curve. “Put your fucking seat8elt on.”

 

          “OOOOH, YOU’R3 GONN4 K1CK MY 4SS? M4YB3 1’D L1K3 TH4T!” Terezi licked her lips, then cackled.

 

          For probably the eight millionth time in their friendship, Vriska was guiltily grateful that Terezi couldn't see the flush of her cheeks or the mortified face she was making.

 

         “1 TH1NK 1’D L1K3 K1SS3S B3TT3R TH4N K1CKS!” Terezi winked, then puckered her lips dramatically.

 

          “Sorry 8oo. I don't kiss drunk girls.” Vriska could feel her heart racing in her chest with something that DEFINITELY wasn't nerves, at all.

 

         “W3LL JUST PR3T3ND 1’M 4 BOY.” Terezi pouted up at her.

 

         “Nope. Still not happening. I'm an equal-opportunity kisser. Sober up, then we can talk.”

 

         “BUT 1 DON'T W4NN4 T4LK! 1 W4NN4 SMOOOCH!”  Terezi crossed her arms across her chest. “TRUST VR1SK4 S3RK3T TO B3 4 G3NTL3M4N. MY HONOR 1S S4V3D!”

 

         “What honor?” Vriska mumbled, but Terezi had already moved on and was now singing (shouting) along to the old-as-dirt Eminem song their driver was trying to enjoy. This drive couldn't be over soon enough. When they finally did arrive, Terezi didn't want to get out of the car, and had to be bribed with promises of candy and ketchup. The whole way up the stairs, she sang an off-key encore of her car-ride performance.

 

“G35 BUZZ3D, G3T DRUNK, G3T CRUNK, G3T FUUUUCK3D UP, H1T TH3 STR1P CLUB, G3T SOM3 K3TCHUP, 34T 4 P1ZZ4 W1TH SOM3 M34T Y4, GONN4 34T YA-”

 

Vriska fumbled with her keys, then slammed her shoulder against the door until it opened. “Terezi, hush! You’ll wake the neigh8ors!

 

“YOU’R3 TH3 BUZZ13ST OF BUZZK1LLS, VR1SK4 M1DDL3 N4M3 S3RK3T. YOUUUUU SUCK.” She shook a finger at Vriska.

 

“ I sure am. The 8uzziest. Come on, take your shoes off.” She knelt down, undoing Terezi’s laces and struggling to yank them off. Terezi kicked her. “Seriously? Fuck, dude, just sit down and let me help you, alright?”

 

“1 N33D TH3S3!” Terezi sat down hard on the futon, legs swinging. Vriska let out a sigh of frustration.

 

“Yes of course you need your shoes to go to 8ed, what was I thinking? 8ut you’re forgetting something honey.”

 

“WH4T’S TH4T?”

 

“You puked on those shoes, Terezi. And if you think you’re putting your pukey shoes in my 8ed, you’ve got another thing coming.” With an almighty tug, she got the first shoe off, then the second. “Now let’s go get your pajamas on so you can sleep this off.”

 

“P4J4M4S? WH4T? NOOOOOOO!” Terezi flailed her arms, and Vriska sighed again, more loudly this time. She grabbed Terezi around the waist and threw her over her shoulder, ignoring her kicking and the punching of her tiny fists. “NO P4J4M4S! NO B3D!”

 

“Yes pajamas. Yes 8ed. Come on, it’s four o’clock in the morning Terezi.” Vriska dropped her on the bed, where she squirmed and kicked all over again, laughing breathlessly. “Don’t make me take your pants off for you.” Terezi stopped wriggling abruptly and wiggled her eyebrows. “No. You shut your faces up. Just get your vomit pants off, alright? I have a fucking shift tomorrow.”

 

“Takin’ em off. No pants. Fuckin’ pants.” Terezi kicked her pants off lazily and lay sprawled out on the bed.

 

“Good, that’s 8etter. Vriska stood and turned to head for the living room, one hand on the light switch.

 

“WH3R3 4R3 YOU GO1NG?” Terezi asked quietly.

 

“Shhhhhhhh…….. Go to sleep, ok 8a8e?” She switched the light off.

 

“OK4Y. COM3 TO B3D.” Terezi closed her eyes and patted the bed beside her. “OR 1’M GONN4 G3T SO LOUD, YOU DON’T 3V3N KNOW.”

 

Vriska rolled her eyes. “Yeah, alright. I’m coming.” She grabbed her pajama pants from the floor and slipped them on, then rolled into bed. “Just shut up and sleep, alright?”

 

“ ‘K4Y,” Terezi answered gamely, nuzzling up against Vriska. They lay there another moment in silence, and Terezi said softly, “SO, P1G3ONS…”

 

Vriska smacked her in the face with a pillow.

 

_________________________________________________________________________

 

         In the morning, it was Vriska who was suffering for their drunken escapades the night before. Her back hurt from half-carrying her roommate, the her bad arm was twinging like nothing else, and to top it all of she had a cosmic hangover. She woke up to the smell of bacon frying and the sound of Terezi singing Pinball Wizard in the kitchen. It was entirely more grating than normal. Vriska squinched her eyes shut, unwilling to confront the light of day and the accompanying nausea she new would smack her square in the face. She fumbled, arm stretched out beside her to find her glasses in the tangle of the bedsheets. When she managed to get them settled on her face, she opened her eyes. The light of the dull, grey morning was still entirely too bright, but the lack of sun was a huge relief.

 

    “YOU GONN4 ST4Y 1N B3D 4LL D4Y?” Terezi asked . She walked into the room and sat down at the foot of the bed, holding a tray with oven mitts on. Or, one oven mitt and one orange and purple mitten. Vriska only owned one oven mitt, and she wasn’t completely sure where the mitten had come from, but with the smell of bacon wafting into the room, she couldn’t seem to care.

 

    “How are you so chipper?” Vriska asked, reaching over and swiping a piece of bacon. “You drank your weight in liquor last night, you should be miserable right now.”

 

    “W3LL, 1’M NOT 4 L1TTL3 B1TCH. UNL1K3 SOM3 P3OPL3 1 KNOW. YOU SHOULD H4V3 H34RD YOU WH1N1ING WH3N 1 GOT UP TH1S MORN1NG.” Vriska smacked her arm, and Terezi retaliated by trying to lick her in the face. “DON’T H1T M3 YOU 4SS, 1 M4D3 YOU BR34KF4ST.”

 

    “What is that, 8 l8s of 8acon?” She stuffed a few more pieces in her mouth.

 

    “JUST TWO. WHY, SHOULD 1 M4K3 MOR3?” Terezi’s mouth was full of bacon as well.

 

          “No, I think we should 8e good with that.  8ut you do know 8acon isn't a 8reakfast all 8y itself, right?”

 

          “OF COURS3 1T 1S,” Terezi argued. “YOU’V3 GOT YOUR S4LT, YOUR M34T, 4ND YOUR K3TCHUP!” She dipped the bacon in ketchup as if to prove a point. Vriska shuddered.

 

          “You're fucking nasty,” she grumbled, but she ate her ketchup-free bacon in grateful silence for a few minutes, letting the pounding in her head slow. When they’d crunched the last few pieces, she spoke up again. “So…….. how much of last night so do you remem8er?” she asked.

 

         “1T’S H4ZY,” Terezi admitted. “SOM3 S1NGING...SOM3 D4NC1NG...SOM3 VOM1T...4M 1 M1SS1NG 4NYTH1NG 1MPORT4NT?”

 

          Vriska shook her head. “Not particularly. You were enraptured with Eminem for a little while. And may8e the U8er driver as well. Which was annoying. I h8 Eminem.”

 

          Terezi rolled her eyes. “YOU’R3 JUST J34LOUS OF MY M4D R4P SK1LLS.”

 

          “You're an em8arassment to rap as a genre, nerd,” Vriska sneered. “Go 8ack to your pseudo-poetry and geek music.”

 

          Terezi pouted. “BUT 1 L1K3 MC L4RS!”

 

          “Of course you do.” Vriska sighed heavily, flopping back on the bed and covering her eyes with one arm.

 

          “WHY 4R3 YOU SUCH 4 W1MP?” Terezi asked, cackling. “YOU DR1NK L1K3 4 F1SH 4NY OTH3R T1ME.”

 

         “It’s the sugar,” Vriska said, groaning. “My 8ody doesn't like when I com8ine sugar with alcohol. I h8 thiiiiiiiis!” She kicked her legs for emphasis. Terezi stood up and started getting dressed. “Where are you gooooooooing?” Vriska whined, staring up at her pitifully.

 

         “1’M COV3R1NG YOUR SH1FT, YOU B1G B4BY,” Terezi answered, throwing on her work tee and leggings that were probably Vriska’s. Normally, Vriska would make at least a cursory complaint about changing in front of her (“We’re not all 8lind!”) and taking her clothes without asking (“What if I wanted to wear those today, 8ut they're on your 8utt instead of mine? What if I stole your clothes?”) but she was too grateful for the kind gesture. Also, those leggings did very nice things for butts.

 

         “You reaaaaaaaally don't have to do that for me,” she said reluctantly as Terezi slipped into a pair of (Vriska’s) kitchen shoes.

 

         “1 KNOW. BUT POOR K4RK4T DO3SN’T N33D YOUR M1S3R4BL3 4SS FUCK1NG UP TH3 MOOD 1N TH3 K1TCH3N. T4K3 AC3T4M1NOPH3N 4ND GO B4CK TO SL33P.”

 

          “Thanks Terezi, I owe you 8ig time,” Vriska answered gratefully, pulling the covers up to her chin.

 

          “CONS1D3R 1T R3P4YM3NT FOR M3 THROW1NG UP, BL4CK1NG OUT, 4ND ST1LL W4K1NG UP F33L1NG B3TT3R TH4N YOU.” Terezi tossed the acetaminophen bottle in Vriska’s direction, who barely managed to catch it.

 

          “Ok, we’re even then. 8ut I wish you wouldn’t throw things at me. You'll give me a 8lack eye one of these days.”

  
          “JUST M34NS 1 THROW B3TTER TH4N YOU C4TCH. TH4T’S S4D, VR1SK4. DON'T 4DM1T TH4T TO 4NYON3 BUT M3, 1T’S 3MB4RR4SS1NG.” With that rude assessment, Terezi walked out the door.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick trigger warning for a brief discussion of alcohol abuse. It starts about two paragraphs in and ends not long after the dialogue.

Vriska spent several miserable hours on the couch with a blue Gatorade and some popsicles watching Maury before she managed to quit feeling sorry for herself. The throbbing slowly faded from behind her eyes, and she managed to stand up without immediately sitting back down. As soon as that happened, she started to feel a teeeeeeeeensy little twinge of guilt. Terezi, who spent the night puking her guts up and probably didn't feel as chipper as she came off that morning. Vriska sighed and looked around. If Terezi was going to cover her shift, she could at least clean up the house. There were empty take out boxes heaped on the coffee table and open bottles of rum and wine lined the windowsill. That's not even speaking of the kitchen, which may have been beyond hope. She should probably find some gloves, honestly.

Two hours, two trashbags, and the entire original Broadway recording of American idiot later the place looked nearly habitable. Vriska carried the bags to the back window, checked to be sure no one was looking, and tossed them into the dumpster below with a satisfying crash. She wiped her hands on her pants and looked around. The laundry was in the wash downstairs, the dishwasher was running (after a few aggressive kicks to the bottom left corner) and Vriska was now contemplated borrowing Equius's vacuum. But she knew that would lead to a sweaty conversation about the importance of taking care of your things and being responsible. Instead, she grabbed the broom and did her best to sweep up most of the crumbs from the kitchen and living room, pushing them out the front door and into the hall for someone who owns a dust pan to take care of. Just as she sat down, finally ready to relax again, her phone rang. 

The caller ID said Kanaya, so unfortunately Vriska couldn't ignore it. She groaned, then hit talk. "Heyyyyyyyy, what's up?" 

"Hello, Vriska." Kanaya sounded funny. Not upset, but...funny.

"What's up?" Vriska repeated, unable to keep a little concern from leaking into her tone.

"Nothing Is Wrong, Exactly," Kanaya hedged. "It Is Just..."

"Just........" Vriska echoed.

"Rose Has Told Me That She Has Joined A Therapeutic Group For People Who Are Afflicted With Alcoholism."

Vriska was surprised. "Really? 8ut she doesn't drink that much, does she?"

Kanaya sounded conflicted. "Not Excessively So, No. But She Does Seem To Use Alcohol As A Coping Mechanism. And Once She Starts To Drink, She Does Not Seem To Know When To Stop." It sounded as though she was fiddling with something. Vriska listened a moment before recognizing the clicking of knitting needles, Kanaya's favorite coping mechanism besides trashy romance novels. 

"That sounds a little 8it like a good thing, Kanaya. Like may8e she's an alcoholic, may8e she's not. 8ut either way, she's trying to 8e 8etter and make her life 8etter." Vriska shifted the phone to her good shoulder and started putting away clean dishes. 

Kanaya laughed softly. "Not Very Long Ago You Would Have Said That Was Stupid And Dramatic, You Know."

"I 8et I would have. 8ut we all grow up. It's hard, and no one understands, 8ut getting 8etter feels pretty good."

"That Is...Very Reassuring, Actually," Kanaya said, sounding surprised. "I Have To Go Pick Rose Up From Her Meeting, But I Will Keep You Updated."

"Sounds good! Give Rosey my 8est, ok?" 

"Absolutely. Goodnight!" And with that, Kanaya was gone.

Vriska stood still for a moment, feeling a bit caught off guard. She'd never had any indication that Rose had a problem, but looking back she could piece it together. Should she have seen it before? Should she have said anything? Vriska pinched the bridge of her nose. These circular thoughts always gave her a headache. It was always hard for her to remember that people aren't as easy to fix as plots in a roleplay. She tried not to linger on the thoughts of what she should or could have done.

Without warning, the front door opened and Terezi came clattering in. "H3Y VR1SK4, HOW 4R3 YOU F33L1NG- W41T!" she sniffed the air dramatically. "DO 1 SM3LL SO4P? D1D YOU W4SH SOM3TH1NG? PL34S3 T3LL M3 1T W4S TH3 SH33TS!"

Vriska snorted. "It was the 8edsheets. All the laundry, actually. And the trash. The dishes. The living room, the kitchen, our 8edroom........I pretty much speed cleaned the whole place. I know, I'm the 8est," she added modestly.

"Y34H YOU 4R3! CL34N SH33TS!" Terezi cheered, throwing an arm around her shoulder and then withdrawing hastily. "OOH! YOU D1DN'T CL34N 3V3RYTH1NG!" Terezi said, pinching her nose.

"What????????" Vriska asked, annoyed. Everything around her was the cleanest it had been in months. "What did I miss?"

"YOU M1SS3D YOU!" Terezi answered, still covering her face. "YOU SM3LL L1K3 A L1QUOR STOR3 GOT 1N 4 F1GHT W1TH 4 PH1LLY CH33S3ST34K 4ND LOST...SO MUCH ON1ON, VR1SK4!" She coughed dramatically.

"Oh it can't 8e thaaaaaaaat 8ad." Vriska sniffed an armpit and winced. It was that bad.

"YOU 4R3 NOT SL33P1NG ON CL34N SH33TS SM3LL1NG L1KE TH4T. GO T4K3 4 SHOW3R, 1'M B3GG1NG YOU!" Terezi gave her a little shove in the direction of the bathroom. "GO ON, GO!"

"I'm going, I'm going, jegus..." Vriska reluctantly headed to the bathroom. She knew she smelled rank, but she was almost too tired to bother with showering. But she had to admit, Terezi was right about putting her dirty body on clean sheets. Sighing, she slipped out of her dirty pjs and into the shower.

The hot water undid knots in Vriska's back that she hadn't realized were there. She deep conditioned her hair for the first time in months, wincing at the thought of what Kanaya would say if she had seen the tangled top knot she'd forced her greasy locks into earlier that afternoon. She tilted her head back and sighed heavily, letting the tension escape like ghosts in the steam. Through the pattering of the water on tile, Vriska thought she heard her phone ringing. "Terezi!" she called. "Could you get that?"

Terezi didn't answer, but a moment or so later she popped her head in the bathroom. "YOU C4LL3D?"

"Yeah, I wanted to ask you to grab my phone, but I guess it's too l8." Vriska pulled the shower curtain shut tighter as the cold air from outside the bathroom snaked its chilly tendrils through the steam. "8e a doll and shut that door? I don't want to 8e a 8lue8erry popsicle." Terezi came in and shut the door behind her. "Not...what I meant." Vriska mumbled, knowing it was too late to argue. She peered around the curtain and saw that Terezi was combing her hair with Vriska's comb.

"WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1NG TH1S W33K3ND?" she asked, in a voice so casual that it had to be fake. 

"I might 8e playing 8efore the Storm. The plan is to 8e as lazy as possi8le and relax for as long as I can 8efore midterms." Vriska stuck her head out, eyeing Terezi suspiciously. "Why????????"

"W3LL..." Terezi trailed off, pretending to focus on her hair. "1'M GO1ING HOM3 TH1S W33K3ND, 4ND MY MOM K33PS ON PESTER1NG M3 TO BR1NG FR13NDS HOM3 L1K3 MY S1ST3R DO3S. 1 M1GHT H4V3 TOLD H3R 1'D BR1NG YOU?"

"Terezi, what the hell!" Vriska groaned. "You know I'm 8ad with parents! Do you really want your mother, the LAWYER, to meet your 8ad influence roomm8? 8ecause that sounds like a horri8le idea to me."

"MY MOM 1SN'T SOM3 K1ND OF F4SC1ST, VR1SK4, C4LM DOWN. 1 4LW4YS F33L B4D L34V1NG YOU H3R3 WH3N 1 GO HOM3. YOU G3T SO MOP3Y."

"I do not," Vriska said mopily. She heard herself and flushed. "Anyway, I have plans."

"H4V1NG 4 D4T3 W1TH 4RC4D14 B4Y 1SN'T PL4NS. 4NYW4Y, 1 4LR34DY F1N1SH3D TH3 G4M3 4ND 1 DON'T TH1NK YOU SHOULD B3 HOM3 4LON3 FOR TH3 3ND1NG." She shuddered.

"Tereziiiiiiii!" Vriska grabbed a bar of soap from the shelf and slung it across the bathroom, missing Terezi's shoulder by inches. "No spoilers!"

Terezi grinned and wiggled her eyebrows. "NO SPO1L3RS 1F YOU COM3 V1S1T MY MOM W1TH M3!" she said, cackling.

"No spoilers or I 8eat you 8loody with a 8ase8all 8at!" Vriska threatened, but she already knew it was over. Terezi would shout every detail of the story as loud as she could even as Vriska tackled her to the ground. She could see the whole thing playing out in her mind.

"SUR3 YOU W1LL. BUT MY MOM M4K3S 4M4Z1NG L4S4GN3, 4ND 1 KNOW YOU H4V3N'T H4D 4 HOM3COOK3D M34L 1N MONTHS." Terezi had set the comb down and was leaning on the sink, facing the shower. Vriska felt uncomfortably like she was being looked not just at, but through.

"Ok, fiiiiiiiine!" she said, throwing her hands in the air. "As long as I can 8ring the leftovers 8ack and freeze them for the next time I feel like eating real food." 

"OK4Y, 1'LL GO C4LL MY MOM!" Terezi said, leaving the room and forgetting to shut the door.

"IT'S FUCKING COLD IN HERE TEREZI!" Vriska called after her. "THAT HAD 8ETTER 8E THE 8EST LASAGNA I'VE EVER HAD, 8UTTMUNCH!"


End file.
